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Messages - Mrokii

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1

Has he tried reaching out to immediate family and real-life friends? People like that might be more sympathetic and better judges of his need.
Yes, he has. And some of them do help him. But Raven has a way of reacting to illogical behaviour that alienates him from people. Part of it is because he naturally notices all kinds of imbalances in peoples' lives (of those he cares deeply about) and very often points these out, in a way to help them. So, all in all, he only has a few friends these days and none of them are rich enough to help him out on his goal.

2
Hello,

I am back after a longer time-out period than I anticipated, due to reasons I don't want to talk about at the moment.

I've never experienced him as somebody with delusions.
Yet he clearly has delusions as indicated on his website? I mean, no offense, but his idea to program a brain/human transcendence computer program is quite obviously a delusion.
If I didn't know that you can't know Raven as good as I do, I would take that as an offense. Raven does have some autistic traits and an extremely analytical mind, and the way he talks is the way he describes what he's doing to change his behaviour. I guess you don't know anybody with autistic traits who can even talk about the differences of their mind, but Raven did talk to me for a long time and to me his explanations sounded logical.

3
To all the people following this threat,

unfortunately I won't be available from Friday, 22nd to Friday 29th, due to a personal trip that couldn't be rescheduled. Therefore I won't be able to visit this forum during the following week, so any questions will be answered with some delay.
For now, thank you all for your input, may it be questions, concerns or good wishes.

4
This campaign would be more believable if it was only raising money for the surgery. As of now, many people who would help are not helping because they are skeptical about the high costs. It would also be much more marketable if people could know they were helping someone who legitimately needed something like a surgery, which could be all he needs, and not the extraneous items added to the campaign.
No offense meant, but I don't understand your arguments, really.

As I have said before, the *main* goal is the surgery, and (assuming he gets the money necessary for the surgery) he will use it for exactly that purpose. If Raven would reach this goal alone, there's a very good chance that this would help draining the mucous from his sinuses. The broken nose seems to be one big reason why the mucous can't drain properly.
Maybe it was a mistake to add all the other items (which might be of secondary importance, once the surgery is done successfully). But you have to understand that Raven has tried to be as straight forward as he could be. He *knows* that a lot of what he's saying and thinking might sound outlandish to others without lengthy explanations, but he is also a perfectionist (and somebody who doesn't ask for help easily, I might add, even if that sounds funny to you) and so he wanted to reveal as much of himself as possible, so people would know who they're dealing with.

It's most unfortunate that it isn't easy to explain how Raven thinks in a few short sentences. I can only say, that I, having talked to him for years extensively, regard him as one of the most logical thinking humans I've ever met. Raven *never* states something he doesn't thoroughly believe in and I've never experienced him as somebody with delusions. Whenever he had told me something that sounded "weird" about him, he always had logical reasons and, if he have the energy, he would be able to explain his arguments in a logical way. But he's a perfectionist to the extremes, and these explanations would take a long time. Unfortunately that isn't possible at the moment. People will have to trust him (or me) or they don't. There's not much else I can do or say at the moment.

5
Thank you very much for all this information, Mrokii. Unfortunately, it again boils down to Raven's subjective assessment, and what we really need is some piece of information from a doctor.
I am sorry that you think that way. I can only say that Raven, at least at the moment, is most probably too exhausted, to go to that other doctor who wrote something about his environmental sensitivities.

I guess it doesn't change much, but I want to mention that it isn't necessarily the sinusitis as such that is so exhausting and draining his energy. It is more the long-term clogging of his throat and sinuses that often tie Raven to his bed. He had often told me that he needs many minutes, up to an hour or two, to cough up mucous, just to be able to breath relatively normal. He also has to drink lots of water (far more than one would drink regularly) to not dehydrate. Apparently, his body produces huge amounts of thick mucous, and that makes it very, very difficult for him to breathe.
As I said before, I know exactly how people can wither away who suffer from low oxygen-intake. My father had extreme lung damage (for other reasons), so much so that he needed an apparatus to inhale oxygen 24/7, just to live. And even with that, he withered away, dying more and more each day. And that happened *without* any kind of infection.
I know I probably won't convince you of anything I stated, but so be it. I am absolutely convinced that Ravens' situation is very, very serious and that he does need the help he asks for. It is generally very difficult for him to aks for *any* help, and he would not do it, if the situation weren't life-threatening. That is what I'm convinced of, and I'm not the only one of his (few) friends who's very worried about him. But again, I'm sure that won't convince you. But still, I wanted to express how I feel about his situation as I see it.
Plus, he will soon have to deal with the fact that his land

6
It might help if there was someone coordinating the care and allocation of resources on Raven's behalf like his wife or a social worker? Perhaps people might feel more comfortable donating if that were the case.
There is nobody like that, as far as I know.

It looks like prior to the birth of his daughter, he wasn't complaining about his ills.
Nope, that's not quite true. It's just that his illness/sensitivies seem to have gradually gotten worse, and the infection spreading speeding things up into the wrong direction. Raven, as far as I can say, loves his daughter and does not see her as a burden at all. In fact, Malaika is one of the things that has made him doing this campaign.

7
I am skeptical about his demands too. I find it a bit hard to believe that there is a several years wait time for such a surgery in Canada, especially if it is as vital for his life as he claims.
I can't say much about the medical system in Canada, but Raven said that these kinds of surgery are low priority and therefore are scheduled way behind more "important" surgeries. It basically seems to me that the health system in Canada is not in a very good shape. I just heard from another friend from Canada that she has to wait six months for an appointment with a dentist despite having cavities and pain.

8
Just wondering (and not questioning anyone) why surgery is not covered under the Candian Health Care System.
I *think* the public health care would pay, but that would involve a very long waiting time. Raven believes that he doesn't have that time, due to his long term illness, which has made him weaker and weaker. At the moment he's often too weak to even get out of bed and stays inside for long hours or even days.

9
I know people that are really dying. Not one of them would ask for colloidal silver. The problem here is I do not see proof of medical diagnosis, not in an obvious or implied manner. I do not seek to offend however, I would say try again, but stick to the medical points that have been verified and confirmed by doctors.
The colloidal silver was more like a treatment Raven had tried out, but in the end, if he gets the surgery, it might not even be necessary anymore. The colloidal silver was mostly used to treat the infection and actually helped him somewhat, as it seems.

10
Some would argue that saying "unless you donate money, he will die" is a form of emotional blackmail.
I'm sorry if you see it this way. I won't accuse anybody of not helping out if they don't want or can't. It's their own decision. All I can do is presenting his case as I see it, according to what I know about it.

11
I think he truly does need the surgery. (...) If I had the money and if he would only put the money toward the surgery I would donate.
The surgery is the first goal of this campaign and all the money Raven gets will put towards the surgery. The air purifiers, while important for him, will only be bought if he gets more money.

However, he seems to desperately need psychological counseling. He is not weird, he is abnormal. It is not normal to believe he can create a thinktank website and save the world. It is not normal to model your parenting on cat behavior.
I said he has some traits of autism, among other things, and he has a rather unique style of learning. He has taught all he knows to himsilf in his own way, obviously because he needs a specific style of learning. All of this doesn't make him delusional, imho.

It is not normal to repeatedly go to the ER expecting to be treated for a non-life-threatening illness/injury.
I beg to differ. It is normal to go to the ER if your throat is so clogged that you can hardly get *any* air and afraid to suffocate from mucous that clogs up your respiratory system. The last doctor,that sinus-specialist, took his problems serious and I think he was also the one who did the tests to check if the infection spread to his brain, which seems to be a real danger. But I am no expert, so I can't say if this is the case, or even likely.

You don't go to the ER because you can't "breathe well enough to sleep." You go when you can't breathe to the point you think you might literally die of asphyxiation. The ER does not exist to keep you comfortable. It exists to keep you alive.
Raven had times when he barely could get any sleep that lasted longer than only a few short hours. From that I can absolutely understand that he went to the ER because of a severe lack of sleep.

He wasn't near death. He has sleep apnea. It is not going to kill him.
That may sound rude, but that is nothing but an assumption of yours, which may or may not be true.

12
Some more things that worry me are:
In his facebook page, he constantly claims to suffer from a new deadly illness from which he seeks relief (cystic fibrosis etc.) and shares his stories of how doctors think he's nuts. To quote his fb:
Quote
The last time I went to the Burnaby ER, the doctor decided that I had made up my condition because it sounded "too unlikely", and said he was refusing to treat me, told me to stop wasting their time, stop calling ambulances, and told me to see a psychiatrist not a medical doctor, made fun of my shaking in pain, and refused to let me consult another doctor.
Clearly, medical professionals think his sinusitis is no reason to worry and he suffers from psychological problems which make him believe to be dying.
Not quite. There was at least one other doctor, afaik, who took him seriously and who has confirmed his environmental sensitivities. As I said in my last post, I will try to get Raven to get the paper that this doctor wrote. Raven has said that he has to contact the doctor and get that from him.

13
You, ath the very beginning, said that he was going to die. How is that possible from a broken nose and sinusitis? I understand very much that is can be something of great discomfort, but how is that lethal?[/li][/list]
The problem as I understand it is that due to his very long time of being sick, he is extremely powerless (not sure what term would describe it best). At times he has been afraid of suffocating, due to the thick mucous that is clogging up his nose and throat. He had told me a few times that he was afraid he could die while sleeping, as the mucous begins to build up whenever he goes to sleep, which is why he often lacks sleep. Plus, there is the infection that he can't get rid of and (as I understood it) it could eventually spread to his brain, which he has been tested for as well.

All of the "being sick" is very very vague. What symptoms does he actually have? Note that things such as fatigue etc. are probably a sign of psychological problems..
The main symptoms are the sinusitis and the severe clogging up of his throat and sinuses. This gets more severe as soon as he is exposed to dusty air and when a lot of mown grass is around, but there are many other causes he talked about.

The overall notes give the impression of a deep psychological problem, exacerbated by possible chronic sinusitis, such as: He claims to have consciously reprogrammed his brain, wants to change his name to "Raven Singularity", looks to cats for advice on parenting, claims landlord abuse, suffers from MCS etc. (Both are actually indications of a paranoid schizophrenic mind).
These are in part due to his autistic traits, I would say. And the landlord abuse aren't just claims. They could be confirmed by the mother of his child. They had also been to some kind of official agency that deals with rental problems, and the people there confirmed all of his complaints, as far as I know.

Did he consult a psychiatrist about that? It more seems like he is a hypochondriac instead of actually ill.
I can't say anything about that. To me it never sounded so.

And considering he wants to spend an insane sum on air purifiers (which are useless against "chemical" contaminations in a normal home, as the concentration of chemicals in the air is so low they can't be removed, plus the home is far from isolated, making it even more difficult to purify the air)
All I can say is that Raven had tried a cheaper air purifier before which helped a bit, but not enough to make his situation considerably better. Raven had researched the expensive air purifiers for a long time.

, perhaps seeing a psychiatrist about his mental illness might be a more appropriate way to spend all that money?
I seriously doubt that, but I am no expert. All I know is that he has talked about his degrading health for a very long time and that, according to him, he absolutely needs this surgery that should make it easier for him to unclog his sinuses, which should hopefully make the infection go away.

He claims his daughter also suffers from the same illnesses (MCS, ES). That really sounds like he is projecting his mental problems on his daughter, which is a bit worrying, not to mention that this isn't even a real diagnosis. Are there any indications whatsoever his lovely daughter is actually ill?
As far as I know (and as Raven described on the campaign, Malaika showed some similar problems of clogged up throat some time ago, so much so that they had to get her to a hospital to treat her.

And is the charge of buying air purifiers for her mothers' home actually warranted, given that they are divorced anyway?
As far as I know, yes. Despite them being separated, she seems to still regard him as a friend and would accept him putting an air purifier into their home. Raven told me about this as well.

The "regaining health" section really needs a workover before I am considering giving any money. ... not healing any underlying medical problems. That's basically the same as alternative medicine.
All I can say is that all these were things that Raven tried and which seemed to really help him, reducing the mucous a bit, and thus helping him to regain energy.

He claims he wants help to break free from poverty... That does sound a lot like he just wants money. I don't see either how a chronic sinusitis (which I have as well) prevents him from doing any paid work (even if it is from his home). From the pictures, he looks quite far from wasting away due to his "disease". Is there actually any certification from a doctor that proves he is unfit to work? If not, he really should earn some money on his own to help the funding..
The "break free from poverty" just means that he wants to be healthy enough to start working again. He *only* seeks money for his medical treatments and what he believes will help him to regain his health. As for the "doctor certification" Raven has put something on his Facebook-page and I had asked him about another confirmation. He said, he could get another one from another doctor, which (I think) confirmes his environmental sensitivities. But he has to contact him first, go there and get it. I will ask him if he can get that asap.

Lastly, what is his daughter's weight? She looks a little too heavy, perhaps that is causing some problems for her?
I don't know about that. The video contains scenes that are several months old I think, and so are most of the photos. At the moment I have no really recent information about Malaika.

He claims his "throat is swelling shut" but on his facebook page he listed his diagnosis by his sinus specialist as (...) For those who aren't into medical terms, pharynx: normal means his throat is alright. So that seems to be a paradox. And furthermore, it just says "Hey, you have a broken nose (quite broken) and a chronic sinus infection", but nothing about his condition being lethal.
The lethality (as I see it) comes from his years-/months-long chronic problems that kept his body from gaining energy (I'm sorry I can't describe it better). Raven seems to be in a very weak state, his body just doesn't seem to have enough energy to keep up fighting the infection for much longer.

Lastly: Raven has asked me if you, Donari, are reachable somehow, maybe on IRC. If so, I could give you his nick and he could talk to you directly and answer your questions.

14
I understand you're all concerned about giving the money, but I'd rather you thought about how hard you're making this on Mrokii, especially given we're on a public board. You know, it'd be very cool if y'all would be a little more... sensitive. After all, he might be actually ill. Whether psychosomatic or actually physiologically, he needs treatment, the way I see it.
Thank you for your encouring words. I understand that people want to have proof before they give money and I'm trying as best as I can to explain the situation. But as you said, ultimately, it seems very likely that his condition won't get significantly better (if at all) without the surgery.

I'm very sorry, Mrokii, my current situation doesn't allow me to make online transferences of any kind... But I sure would help, if I could. I couldn't imagine living in a country where I can't pay for the treatments I need.
I understand that, no worries. I didn't expect there to be a wealthy donator to give him lots of money. It was just something I had to try.

And thanks again. I remember you well from some interesting RP. ;-)

15
Also, he is claiming to have had a dissociative personality disorder. I would say that makes it difficult to raise a child with, no?
It didn't make it difficult as long as Raven had enough energy. He needs a lot to control these mental problems and usually is able to. Plus, from what I heard from people around him (including the mother of his child), he is a great father and his daughter loves to be around him.

Also, it just strengthens the claim that perhaps he has an underlying psychosomatic problem for his diseases. Perhaps you can provide us with a proper diagnosis sheet by a doctor, Mrokii?
I'm not sure if there were ever a diagnosis about a psychosomatic causes for his disease. But I will ask Raven about something regarding his physical problems (which he should have, as he had visited quite a few doctors during the last few months.

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