Forward from the author:
Free rhymes, lines. Too many to care about metrics.
This story is anecdotal and not to be taken offensively please. Whatever you read is fruit of fantasy, invention, but yes, it does portray real situations and people.
To appreciate or critic the developers? That is stocastic. I rolled 1d11 -1.
10= I'd unfolded the weapon of sarcasm
0= sympathy close to worshippal
The result was 2.
This means the story will be very aligned in favour of Planeshift and its developers.
I struggle!
Before reading, please put on one of the two videos and listen in background:
1) http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hadxBZWxNrs
2) http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZIk4qTKmKzE
Cope with it, that's part of the stupidity, essential to grasp the essence.
Enjoy!!
Heed the warnings!!-----PrologueI ask thee oh Hadfael,
of Talad's me to tell
the mighty court and sort
built in the Hydlaa Fort.
Tell us.. and begin where
from you like. I'm aware
not of the mysteries
that Planeshift full of is.
Fill my mouth of great deeds
or mischievious, if't needs.
Their dwelling's full of plots...
help me: dangers are lots
and hard to avoid, but if
so you wish, make it brief.
1. DevmanshipMale Ylian came to me
but Diabolus at heart.
A combination he may exhert
of Logic, when you, see:
obtain a positive output
if positive is
only one input
of the two. To this stub
add my martial arts blackbelt tag.
We have ten of them
and are ranks that make you grand.
Such six letters summed, show
The name of a dear friend
such or, he was.
I don't comprehend.
So tell me, Yian friend:
What about this stone,
I found on ground
outside Hydlaa's bound
but that from my pocket was gone?
-Gold ore - said him.
Good friend! Identifies stuff for me.
He would talk about stuff to me.
Monsters? From sight they flee
When his around
sword takes a sound.
Yes together we talk
laugh, eat chalk
(I was a kran).
Sounds like a plan.
How sweet, chalk is.
Tell me its chemical properties please.
I'm not intelligent, don't tease.
But let me tell you of Talad.
Pay heed to me, don't eat salad!
Laanx is NOT the good one
as they tried to fool some
infact she's wicked
and has Talad pricked.
So, I see him depart
with mastery and art
reach the god and nod
show the mortal Fatigue
which for us is now a plague.
He is then crowned Immortal.
As we did in the past
but - Why not we chatter
as this rock we shatter?
-Sorry. The rock is secret.
-Is it? Then I regret.
In the past we've talked about it
as we deemed proper and fit.
-No problem, now just shut up.
And to this I put up.
But one day he bring
me to a spring
and fresh water we drank
and our hands we sunk.
It was then
Talad appeared then,
and told me - Why you
drink water through?
-Water? That's the name of this
liquid! Thanks! My lord, I please.
Talad was angered.
-Tmed, you put at stake,
that I would make
secret the word "water"??
-Oh no - said I
a bit shy.
-Your champion said
this liquid bears a secret name.
I know what water is!!
I trusted him on this.
-This is stupid - said Talad.
Water is common and cheap,
no reason for secrecy.
Realizing what my friend had become,
my heart would break,
but I was a kran
and had none.
Begone.
2. Parable of the Ulbernaut.Having had nothing to do,
my feet on ground were bound by glue.
So I prayed to my Lord, oh Talad.
And he told me about this funny fact,
of which I made a tract:
He had the letter R.
So R, had. Rhad.
R for ravenous
enthusiasm furious.
One day Rhad went
outside his camping tent
to the Ojaveda planes.
Grass does green stains.
See an eternal chase
by an Ulbernaut chasing - a Trepor.
They ran for ages
not aware of mages.
Rhad was looking
and witnessing
their endless struggling
one to live, the other to eat.
It didn't took but a bit
and Rhad cast a stone wall
which the Trepor hit and made a fall.
- Enjoy Ulbernaut: a feast!
But, not happy, the beast
turned to Rhad
which to flee had.
Oh Talad, please tell me the moral.
-Don't feed the beast! - came the voice choral.
3. Hail to the cat!You have visions
of five comsonants.
This is a story hence,
of two ex-friends.
One is Hadfael my muse,
the other one is the son of an excuse.
One day the kittencat
on his desk sat
and walking scrambled the glyphs
his name was so produced. - What a random name! Eh?
Discounts are not excused
if in his shop you work.
Bring a bit of cork
to close up the potions bottles.
But he's not an alchemist.
He loves to be wrapped in mist
exactly like Mr Gist.
Oh good cat. Small feline, not enki.
In Talad's slang I may ask: "Ma chi?"
if I don't know what the heck you are.
This vowel-less guy took the crown
like the guy of I spoke of, updown.
But instead to rash, he took a smaller step.
For which our hands we may clap.
A step closer to Talad, a step farer from Hadfael,
but all for a good cause. My muse,
dear Hadfael
was then accused.
The vowelless friend came
and defended him despite blame.
Too bad that since back
of Hadfael he's lost track.
And so this guy and the previous one...
...have gained a crown,
but have lost much more.
4. A matter of vengeance
A matter of vengeance.
No, not revenge,
but the man called Vengeance.
He didn't want anything to avenge
nor to be a paladin or Ranger.
Once again I prayed to Talad and he song:
In the eyes of Venge,
the unsuspected stranger,
had better know the truth
of wrong from right.
'Cuz the eyes of Venge are upon you,
every wrong you do he's gonna see.
When you're in Hydlaa look behind you,
'cuz that's where the Venge's gonna be. [-credit to Chuck Norris]
Not in the sewers, but
he picked a Pack Rat
within his Net
and used it to trap
any image or picture.
Too bad it also trapped
the complaints
of Hydlaa citizens.
But, stood up above,
he needn't care.
The complaints he disposed of
with the almighty Shrug
and calmly drank from a mug.
Lest shall I pay heed,
to a man which fantasy doesn't feed
If shamed to be Ranger,
he'll remain Unsuspected Stranger.
Of suspects I've got my pockets full
and here noone is a fool (except Xillix who's First and rules them)
so I'll get up from my stool
and start to investigate by myself. Cool.
And addressing Venge, totally overwhelmed,
I was overkilled with a line:
...And I will strike down upon thee with great vengence and furious anger! [Ezekiel 25:17]
I yield
and flee
the field.
5. Fallback to the topFew problems or people
have haunted PS, my pal,
since its beginning.
And my head is spinning.
Stalkers, lamers, bugs, pests.
After all, few have finally gone
but to bust them noone is prone
for bitter is dirtying your hands.
Fortunately I'm one who understands.
But one by one the Crowned
have smashed them around
enduring their shriek sound.
They have surpassed all the difficulties.
Someone from the beginning irreprehensible
others acting like their presence is indispensible
and were crowned from the beginning.
Even if my parrot has better wits
every members together well fits.
But of a plain shit
the universe of Plane Shift
hasn't gotten ridden off.
And pay heed, it's not a spinoff.
This shit comes from its Past
and my nerves has put to test.
Noone, even doing their best,
could leave Planeshift to rest
but to come back couldn't lest.
And this problem I will attest.
One day, late spring in May,
In PlaneShift you had no prey
but stones. Don't hear bell tolls
but harvest for a thousand crystals.
A diamond doesn't buy a mug
and having nothing to do, a gig
was started. Amidst nothing you
hear stories pulled out of blue.
The proper word is inedia
or as you wish, "commedia",
but they called it "imagination".
Of real, social, life starvation
human mind plays bad tricks.
Faking to lay bricks
gets called building,
here's where we're meddling.
Now buildable comes a house
but roleplayers not even buy a blouse
or disturb to kill a mouse.
They truly need Doctor House.
Originally, in the middle of Nothing,
welcome came, their imagination.
It was better than nothing.
Now, unable to do the migration
in their pockets they find nothing.
Now, what we can tolerate
is what of no harm cause is immediate
to people or things.
But hearing people crow and cry, I think...
...oh crowned ones, eraticate
this plague much unfortunate
from PlaneShift. A mistake.
Some dirt we all can sweep with a rake.
Of roleplay I've had enough
when I'd kill a Troll tough
with the roll of a die.
Now, we'll all rather die.
6. Nth Parable of TaladOne day Talad incarnated himself,
took shape in the Magic Shop by the shelves
and his fake name started with "Sh".
He then travelled among Hydlaa citizens
to find who was to him loyal
and who with blasphemies
in private cursed his name.
He started his trip to Hydlaa Plaza,
unobserved he went, through
the fork in the forest and then the gate.
And without any debate,
the guards let him inside
and he walked around the side,
observing his loved people
and their daily cripple.
Laanx they worshipped by virtue.
On the square, Hers was the statue.
Talad had no problem in this nor was sad
but wished to see what in his name was said.
Answers he could find in a tavern
where many folks were debating
and there he found one of his priests
by the name of Tmed called.
He was arguing against everyone
shamed by every but noone
and this despite his cause
defending and pleading because
he could bring reason behind his words.
While they chattered about steathing swords
in the tavern, which is peaceful,
the language got colourful.
The priest, given powers, could cast
people away or silence them with a blast.
People would then bring respect
not by virtue but as a pact.
But, in silence the swift incarnation
could see and make resolution
that Tmed was the only honest
of them and truly earnest.
So Talad tried to besmirch his own name
and say of himself possible blames.
But the kran could respond to all
the accuses and for nothing did fall.
In all of this, always kind, never superb,
even if Tmed had only inferiors around him.
This "Sh" Klyros then began inquiring
the kran in the secret and intriguing
language that the others couldn't understand.
Only the two could comprehend.
He befriended the kran faking ignorance.
The situation got progressively less tense.
He tried to fool the priest into blasphemizing
the God, but he was truly loyal and insisting.
At this, Talad could laugh at Tmed's ignorance
but happy of his loyalty and diligence.
But Gods, as we know them, are lesser
beings who inhabit a world that is bigger
than ours and they have their superiors.
My example could be Vodul, yours?
This kran, one called simply "God" then told
of Talad's treachery very old.
And last laughter fragorous
belonged to Tmed the righteous.
But some wicked person
Took Tmed's papers and and changed
his name and anagraphical version.
For him, nothing else was arranged.
And thus now no longer does he exist,
to talk about him no reason to persist.
7. Who wages more? Be careful pal.Sometimes you find two men
pulling a rope. But count to ten
and some has won. But if one exaggerates
and pulls too much, the rope breaks...
and everyone has then lost!
This has happened, for most.
A sword fighter in the arena,
relying on the Power of the Levels...
and the beggar downtown,
which, in front of Harnquist
and in the tavern, pleaded
in favour of Imagination, Stories and Wits.
And they made a great noise!
Noone in the square could relax.
They made more noise than collectors of tax.
So loud was their proud voice.
One said - You are no match for my sword!!
I am powerful, you are weak and useless!!
The other -You are dumb and such your word!!
Your brain is truly helpless!!
Suddenly a powerful warrior appeared.
Truly, it was Vengeance! And this could be heared
- NO! You are BOTH the most useless
ugliest, dumbest and helpless
creatures on Yliakum.
And with all the racket you're doing,
not even Talad, nor Laanx could rest
comfortable for a second, to the point
they cast aside their millenary quarrel
and agreed upon the fact YOU both
are the worst thing ever existed.
Of your excreted words, I don't comprehend
a damn. Of this babbling, not a word I understand.
I am more concrete and don't think this
discussion made any sense to a sane mind.
Then again, even if it did, the disgraceful means
of expressing give you the highest dishonor.
I am sore and will dispose of you
the way you deserve. Enter the Death Realm,
more suitable a place for yourselves.
You'll render it even more desolate
and a constant pain for the ears and eyesore. -
...And he struck down upon them with extreme Vengeance and furious anger!!!
Nothing but cinder remained of them on the Plaza floor.
Hands were clapped.
May Vengeance be praised!
A good point he raised
and demonstrated the true worth
doesn't reside in the arena room to the north
or in your chldish fantasy or adverse.
First, it resides in your manners!
Everyone then started to live as intended
with no position to be overdefended
but an equilibrium of fantasy and concrete.
8. A phoenix will rise!This guy's first name
coincides with my third name.
And probably three times
I have of his age.
Always calm, he doesn't enrage.
But always badly he was treated
and none intelligence credited.
Even of opinable seriousness,
One thing enough I'll never stress:
The mint on the second level
couldn't produce coins enough
to ever pay a fair price rough
for how much he's actually clever.
I was young and had his same zeal
but life lessons to it put a seal
and now all of it I lost.
Thing to avoid to every cost
is the flame of enthusiasm: like a candle
burns you out. May this come handle!
Senior strategists crave youth,
young strategists crave seniority.
But if vengeful warriors struck you or banish,
outlive them and see their objections vanish.
Ha ha ha! Yes, people!
A fire bird will rise, but not on top of Hydlaa streets.
It'll go wherever it likes, free by heart, bound by spirit.
During chain slavery you learnt skills.
Now they are yours and you're a diamond.
Which splendour everyone thrills.
Empty the canvas, draw from scratches.
Every bit of fantasy matches
and far horizons your vision reaches.
9. Argh! a Ghost! Luke'sI close my eyes.
Argh! a Ghost!
I see the white man.
A white man I see,
or is it the effect of the LSD?
And while I see a white man,
a man in white I see.
[Note for pricks: LSD stands for Liquid Stone Diamond (krans love it)]
10. New clothesGolden hair, silver eyes, bronze skin
she was the prettiest of the Dermorian kin.
Such a beauty, with some nerve
you'd claim exquisite cloth didn't deserve.
But she was poor and couldn't afford
anything but rags. But only a word with,
someone of cash would give her plenty.
They promised millions... how, you ask?
All for a simple but special naughty task.
Disgusted, she was a woman of good costumes!
But those couldn't buy her even the food.
Of her, Laanx would make fun
because everyday she to work had to run.
Horrible people this world inhabit
and very sick have an habit.
They kill for cash
they steal rash.
Friends would quarrel for a price
of the auction of a glyph of ice.
And so the former friendship
is sunken like a ship.
Three months she ate only half
and this sacrifice on behalf
for new clothes to save enough.
She ate half but work got twice
as fatiguous. What sad a price!
She reached the clothes shop
with twelve trias. What a flop!
The merchant demanded
twelve... millions.
- Are you kidding? - she said.
-Truly not. The economy soared.
Even the bum down the street
three million had in his pocket fit.
-But my months of sacrifice?
-This society, them does not prize.
The Jester Fool step down
from the throne and headed to town.
Everywhere all the cash was removed
and perfect balance restored.
I think that's Commendable.
Everything went back to normal in two weeks.
11. A game at nightKerol was sent at night
and truly had a sight
of terror and fright.
Three people cause disaster might.
They had a dinner,
and played a game, the winner
should be the Benign
while the loser
should be Good Sources.
Benign acted as a girl pathetic,
Good Sources as some person apathetic
everyone using nicknames
to keep secret their names.
Except Kerol had nothing to hide
and at sunlight he may stride.
In vain he tried his hostess
to reveal her name, no success.
They made sure their secrets were steel-plated
Good Sources even had his nickname translated.
- As you may have understood -
said Good Sources grabbing his hood
-... you've been poisoned. Only I
have the antidote. One of you is a spy
and trapped you I have, this way lame.
Do as I say, now let's play a game. -
Benign dropped her mask
and ran for the antidote flask.
But Good Sources cast a spell
and the flask was surrounded by a cell
of energy, darkness and fire.
Then the girl started to delire.
- You better do what I say:
to survive there's no other way-
The first test was a magic quiz.
Benign filled it in blitz,
while Kerol was too ignorant.
From expectations, differently it went.
-The spy is very skilled at magic. -
For the girl, this sounded tragic.
Of second test Kerol was content
as it concerned the management of an event.
A company of actors was brought and had to wage,
the murder of the Octarch they had to stage.
But imprevists killed Kerol performance
which plan couldn't resist the slightest nuisance.
Differently went for the girl who won
having everything under control and so on.
- Of the spy I search, the plans can resist
absolutely any sort of imprevist.
Thus Kerol can't be. Doesn't match the description.
Of the spies he's a leader if I've got recolletion. -
Frustrated for the failed tests, the girl cursed.
- The spy I search is polite, not stupid or wicked.
Now I have enough proof. Benign is the spy.
She will die under this black sky.
I looked for a great leader and skilled man
and I wonder if to match this, Kerol ever can.
Of possibilities we have two:
either the spy is Kerol, you,
but they chose a complete inept
as the leader of the spies' sect
or Benign is my target.-
Concluding with this sarcastical comment,
to Good Source the truth was more than evident
In vain the girl protested...
and hereby the horrors cannot be attested.
_______________
Attersson loves you all! (except flamers or people who can't take jokes)
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- continued to plead in desperation.