« previous next »
Pages: [1] 2

Author Topic: a scrawl on a wall  (Read 3486 times)

steuben

  • Veteran
  • *
  • Posts: 1834
    • View Profile
    • Myspace
a scrawl on a wall
« on: October 22, 2006, 01:40:30 am »
the demon did not call us,
we came.
the demon bid us go,
we stayed.
he promised us death,
we fought for life.
through fire, we stood by him.
into hell, we followed him.
we were his because.
because,
because...
we were his because,
behind us there were
those who should not be
what we were.
« Last Edit: October 22, 2006, 01:44:03 am by steuben »
Logged
may laanx frighten the shadow from my path.
hardly because the shadow built the lexx.
the shadow will frighten laanx from my path.

Kalika

  • Hydlaa Notable
  • *
  • Posts: 551
    • View Profile
Re: a scrawl on a wall
« Reply #1 on: October 22, 2006, 01:42:05 am »
o_0 oooo
Logged

'she lies with her arms flung out as if to embrace the whole hyancinth-scented, watermelon-colored world.'

Phinehas

  • Guest
Re: a scrawl on a wall
« Reply #2 on: October 22, 2006, 02:54:00 am »
My brain hurts now. What have you done!
Logged

Kalika

  • Hydlaa Notable
  • *
  • Posts: 551
    • View Profile
Re: a scrawl on a wall
« Reply #3 on: October 22, 2006, 02:55:02 am »
 ::)

steuben...pat yourself on the backk
you got phineases brain to hurt :D :D
Logged

'she lies with her arms flung out as if to embrace the whole hyancinth-scented, watermelon-colored world.'

Phinehas

  • Guest
Re: a scrawl on a wall
« Reply #4 on: October 22, 2006, 03:00:17 am »
Quote from: steuben on October 22, 2006, 01:40:30 am
we were his because,
behind us there were
those who should not be
what we were.
It's that part. It hurts...
Logged

Kalika

  • Hydlaa Notable
  • *
  • Posts: 551
    • View Profile
Re: a scrawl on a wall
« Reply #5 on: October 22, 2006, 03:04:20 am »
 :innocent:

picky picky picky...
Logged

'she lies with her arms flung out as if to embrace the whole hyancinth-scented, watermelon-colored world.'

Phinehas

  • Guest
Re: a scrawl on a wall
« Reply #6 on: October 22, 2006, 03:06:07 am »
No, I mean it hurts to think about it. To try and figure out what the heck it's s'posed to mean. *bangs head on keyboard*

Ok, we should really stop spamming up poor Steuby's thread.
Logged

Mariana

  • Hydlaa Resident
  • *
  • Posts: 54
    • View Profile
Re: a scrawl on a wall
« Reply #7 on: October 22, 2006, 03:17:37 am »
'behind us' makes me think they were protecting some people from being haunted by this demon
Logged

steuben

  • Veteran
  • *
  • Posts: 1834
    • View Profile
    • Myspace
Re: a scrawl on a wall
« Reply #8 on: October 22, 2006, 03:05:08 pm »
no, no. by all means discuss.
Logged
may laanx frighten the shadow from my path.
hardly because the shadow built the lexx.
the shadow will frighten laanx from my path.

zanzibar

  • Forum Legend
  • *
  • Posts: 6523
    • View Profile
Re: a scrawl on a wall
« Reply #9 on: October 23, 2006, 04:03:25 pm »
Inherent irony.  The meaning of the poem is the meaning you take from it, DESPITE the intention of the author.

"we were his because,
behind us there were
those who should not be
what we were."

To me, this implies that these people left the rest of humanity for fear that their presence would hurt others if they had stayed.
Logged
Quote from: Raa
Immaturity is FTW.

Under the moon

  • Forum Addict
  • *
  • Posts: 2335
  • Writer extraordinaire.
    • View Profile
Re: a scrawl on a wall
« Reply #10 on: October 23, 2006, 09:56:22 pm »
the demon did not call us,
we came.

*A force of evil always draws the heroes to call. Or is it the demon in our own hearts that makes us follow this man?

the demon bid us go,
we stayed.

*Bids and orders fall on deaf ears when there is something to protect.

he promised us death,
we fought for life.

*The lives not ours, but those left behind.

through fire, we stood by him.

*Though it burns, the fire can not be left to spread.

into hell, we followed him.

*As that is where all battles lead.

we were his because.
because,
because...
we were his because,
behind us there were
those who should not be
what we were.

*And our children should not have to fight. We follow you, our Lord, our demon of the bloodied fields. Show us how to save them from our fate. Show us the demons that we, to, must become.
« Last Edit: October 23, 2006, 10:01:39 pm by Under the moon »
Logged

zanzibar

  • Forum Legend
  • *
  • Posts: 6523
    • View Profile
Re: a scrawl on a wall
« Reply #11 on: October 23, 2006, 10:08:20 pm »
the demon did not call us,
we came.

* we were called to the demon because of our nature

the demon bid us go,
we stayed.

* we were not made to stay, we stayed because of our nature

he promised us death,
we fought for life.

* death and life are not necessarily contradictions; death can mean suffering and pain, or it can mean the end of the self, perhaps resulting in rebirth and therefore new life or a new existence

through fire, we stood by him.
into hell, we followed him.

* fire can mean a process of purification or a common struggle

we were his because.
because,
because...
we were his because,
behind us there were
those who should not be
what we were.

* ambiguous, but implies a driving purpose to the endeavor; the endeavor does not justify itself, something is accomplished by it

« Last Edit: October 23, 2006, 10:50:45 pm by zanzibar »
Logged
Quote from: Raa
Immaturity is FTW.

Akaye

  • Hydlaa Citizen
  • *
  • Posts: 270
  • Thread head that loves Strawberries <3
    • View Profile
Re: a scrawl on a wall
« Reply #12 on: October 23, 2006, 10:34:58 pm »
That poem is really deep and I really, really like it. I felt compelled to understand and work out in my head what this poem's meaning was. I mean there are so many possibilities. The end is excellent because I received goosebumps from those last four short yet unnerving written sentences. I can only guess in my head what I might think this poem is trying to communicate  but truly it will hold different meanings for everyone. For some, like myself it holds many messages and meanings. This is a wonderful piece of work and I applaud you Steuben for coming up with this mind twister. It was a treat.
Logged
Zorbels: PS character
Links for Newbies:Players Guide RP Guide PS Settings

Under the moon

  • Forum Addict
  • *
  • Posts: 2335
  • Writer extraordinaire.
    • View Profile
Re: a scrawl on a wall
« Reply #13 on: October 26, 2006, 07:18:23 pm »
*bows, being right "for the most part"*

You folks must not have read steuben's other stories.

The explination in plain, as I see it:

The 'demon' is not an evil, but the nickname of a leader in battles. Let's call him Steuben. The land is torn and the people are without hope. They turn to the Demon to lead them in battle after battle to win peace. Soldiers will follow a good leader to whatever he takes them. In the end, they are fighting for him, because they see themselves as -his- men. They are also fighting for those they left behind, so that their children do not have to "be what we were". That being hopeless and stricken by terrible times.

The poem is not about defeating a demon of great evil. it is about finding hope for the people at the loss of yourself.
Logged

Kixie

  • Veteran
  • *
  • Posts: 1868
  • I chase the moon, liquour, cars and women.
    • View Profile
Re: a scrawl on a wall
« Reply #14 on: October 26, 2006, 08:02:46 pm »
This is my take on the entire poem. It's very abstract, but I decided there had to be a seperate allegorical reference that could be made, because as many have said here "A poem is what you interpret". This is what I have made out of the whole thing:

The demon is simply cowardice.

Cowardice wants us to go, but instead we stay. He tells us we will die if we stay, but we fight instead even if it endangers ourselves. Through many trials he is always near us. Into the pits of hell itself, he is our companion. We are his because. Because we are who we are, he is cowardice. Perhaps if we were cowardice, he would be justice and bravery instead. A logic perhaps, but still a logic flawed. Behind us there are those just like us, and they shouldn’t fight. That is why we fight, that is why we are who we are.
Logged
Pages: [1] 2
« previous next »