The Labyrinth (a parody) staring Moogie. (Done reformating. Read it again. Now.)

[Pestilence]

*grins*

Very good indeed

Will be checking in

[frostwolf10]

Noooo what have you done with Tataro\'s guild leader!!!
so sad... but must remember that he likes ale.

Keep it up /me collapses from lack of oxygen due to laughing that had been escalating in decibels at a highly unnerving rate while typing...

like all the errors, reminds of the Megaman Battle Network Series. We must avoid R$ at all costs!!!

[Under the moon]

Scene six
~Not even if you had beads!~

"Moon, you ass."

Now, I don't know if Moogie normally uses such language, but I'm absolutely sure it applies here. Along with several other explicative statements I will not replete here, but Moogie does. Just assume you all went deaf for the next, ooh, five minutes. That should give her enough time?.

...

...

...


Let's see how she's doing, shall we"

"...dirty, no good, son of a..."

Um...how about ten minutes? Sound good to you? I thought so. Put your feet up, listen to some music, have a snack, use the restroom. I mean, she can't stay mad forever...can she?


...


...


...



Ok, lets give it another shot.

Moogie sits on the ground, the fur on her back standing straight up, but at least she is quiet. Maybe a little too quiet. The kind of quiet someone has while plotting the severe and painful demise of some poor unsuspecting soul...


Perhaps it is better if I end this tale now before anyone gets hurt.

[frostwolf10]

...aww i wanted to hear the end... *sniff*

[Under the moon]

Scene six- take two-
~Not even if you had beads!~

OK, OK! Doen't kill me! I was only kidding. The tale goes on. Sheesh. You people have no sense of humor. We join Moogie as she sits on the ground in peaceful contemplation. Yes I said peaceful, now shut up.

Moogie looks at the small white Fenki figure in her hand. Uh...I guess she didn't forget about that, did she? Well, anyways, the sound of a very drunken dwarf makes her sit up suddenly.

"Awish Murglie! Hobish munfitre juw walshideiben?"

I said he was drunk, didn't I?

 Moogie- "What did you say, Valbrander?"

"Ish Vahbrangj'r' nosh Valjemnd'er'. Ah doenish nowh eye juall peplsh cansh get iad riih."

"Damnit. I can't understand a word you're saying. Speak proper English."

"I told you to be careful what you 'damnit' for." Valbrandr says in perfect proper English.

Moogie does not fall on her face, but is very close to it.

"Now then, my Lady Moogie, how can I help you? With the proper bribing, I will do anything you wish...anything." The dwarf raises that thing that might be an eyebrow again, and winks with a semblance of an eye. Moogie looks with disgust at the horrible little man.

"What is with all you men? You'd think you never saw a girl before!"

"No then?"

"Of course not!"

"All right. What then?"

"Can you help me get to Xordan's castle."

"Well...as to that, he would not like that much. What have you to offer?"

Moogie goes to check her pockets...before realizing she has no pockets. As if the fenki garb had enough fabric to make pockets. All she has is the white figure, and she is not about to give that up.

"I don't have anything."

"Oh, I think you do." The dwarf nods towards Moogie's skimpy top.

"You pig!"

"No, not that. Look on the strap."

Moogie does. On it is tied a small ring.

"How did that get there? What is it?"

"It is your 'Ring of the Past'. You migrated it, remember? Tell you what. You give me the ring, and I will lead you part of the way out of the Labyrinth, get drunk and lost, and eventually lead us both to our terrible deaths amongst a den of glitching uber-rats."

"That's a bad plan."

"Ok. I'm all out of ideas. What do you suggest?"

"How about; I give you the ring, you help me get to the castle, and just to sweeten the deal, I won't ban you when I get back."

"Um...sounds fair. But no uber-rats? Not even one?"

"No."

"Ok, let's go."

Moogie /trades Valbrandr the ring. The dwarf takes the lead, but they only get a little ways before Moogie has to ask a question.

"Why are you so ugly?"

Blunt and to the point.

"Well, my mesh got a little messed up with the last update. The stupid client mixed up my mesh with a sound file. Either that, or I have a virus. Or maybe this is all a cruel joke by some sadistic writer making up a terribly written parody of a beloved classic Jim Henson movie."

Moogie- "Must be the virus. But wow you're ugly."

Valbrandr- "Well you are no Jennifer Connelly yourself."

Moogie- "I can still ban you."

Valbrandr- "Point taken. I am ugly. No banning?"

Moogie- "As long as you don't say anything 'suggestive' again."

Valbrandr- "Hey, I just thought of something."

Moogie- "What's that?"

Valbrandr- "He left out that 'helping hands' groping scene."

Long pause...

Moogie- "Don't remind him. And you're pushing it."



[[Kudos to anyone who gets the 'beads' reference. And shame on you.]]

[Kiirani]

Lol! Very nice I love the \"RuneScape\" bit...

[Valbrandr]

I finally finished reading the entire thread Moon and all I can say is wow.  Thanks for sending it to me, I could have missed out on it.  Instead of echoing the comments of everyone else about your cleverness, I leave with a mere question:  Why cant I be a handsome Dwarf?  .... Aaa well... atleast you gave a good explanation in the story.  Keep it up man.

[Under the moon]

[[A short one this time. Don't worry, V, a miracle may happen.]]


Scene seven-
~I'll tell you where to stick it~


Moogie and Valbrand'r' walk a little farther, but a sudden loud voice makes her stumble in surprise. Luckily for her, she does not fall on her face. Unluckily -for the dwarf, anyways- she falls on his. Oh, I suppose you wish to know what that loud voice was, and more importantly...what it said. Very well, as I see no reason to keep it a secret.

"IMPORTANT!"

Moogie- "What?!"

Valbrandr-........

Moogie, getting up- "What did you say Valbrandon?"

Valbrandr- "It's 'DRR', 'DRRRRR', not 'don' or 'der' or whatever! And I said get off my FACE!"

Moogie- "Well sorry. But you startled me."

Valbrandr- "I didn't startle you, they did."

Loud voice- "IMPORTANT!"

The loud voice seems to be coming from a large red stone face stuck on the top of a wall. There seems to be quite a few of them. Their eyes follow Moogie's every move in a very creepy way.

Moogie- "That's very creepy. What is it?"

Loud voice coming from a red stone face stuck on the wall- "IMPORTANT! README FIRST!"

Valbrandr- "Oh those. Those are just stickies. You find a lot of them around PlaneShift. Just ignore them, everyone else does."

[[new update to the is parody. For those of you who did not see the old forums, 'Stickies' all had IMPORTANT in big letters before the topic. Now, back to editing]]

"Hey! I wrote some of those, you know."

"Actually, I didn't. I never paid them much attention either."

Sticky- "IMPORTANT! CRYSTAL BLUE ERRORS!"

Moogie- "Well you should. They are there for a reason."

Sticky- "IMPORTANT! Community Questions: "What Will/Are/Do You...?"

Valbrandr- "Right. I will read them all...well...actually, I'll just pretend I did."

Moogie- "You know, you are very honest."

Sticky- "IMPORT...."

Valbrandr- "Oh shut up. No one is going to read you."

Sticky- "But it's my job. And no one reads me anymore. Just a little? I'll even whisper. Please...please, please, please, PLEASE, please??

Moogie- "Just let it talk. I can't stand to hear a Sticky beg. It's embarrassing."

Sticky, continuing- "...PLEASE, please, please, please..."

Valbrandr- "FINE! Just say it and SHUT UP!"

Sticky, after a pause- "Um...now I forgot what I was going to say..."

Moogie/Valbrandr- .........

Sticky- "Oh yes! Now I remember. Ehhem..."

Sticky, loudly and dramatic-like- "IMPORTANT! All Characters Will Be Wiped in the Near Future."

Valbrandr- "You said you were going to whisper."

Sticky, whispering- "sorry"

Moogie- "I think that one was read too much. I don't know how many 'Wipe' threads I locked. Can we go now?"

Valbrandr- "Might as well. But you stickies be quiet, or Moogie will delete you. Understand?"

All the stickies- ..........

"Good. Let's go, Moogie."

*pink pink pink*

Moogie- "What was that?"

*pink pink pink*

Valbrandr- "Uh oh."

[Ayshe]

Originally posted by Under the moon
...Moon puts his hand over two of the pieces before Moogie can see what they were. She hears them tip over, and when he takes his hand away, the pieces are gone. The book doubles in size...

Which two, I wonder.

I bet that hurts, Moon...

[Under the moon]

[[So you caught that? And yes, it does, very much so. When the time comes, you will know it. =( ]]

Scene eight.
~And me without my flyswatter~

Monketh stands all by himself, watching people come into the thread. He holds out his hand to stop them.

"Sorry citizens, the update to this story is not yet finished, but the writer felt he needed to respond to that last post. I am calling an official intermission. Please move along. Nothing to see here."

He takes down the 'Scene eight ~And me without my flyswatter~' sign for later use.


[[Just out of curiosity, how many of you have rushed out to re-watch the movie 'The Labyrinth'?]]

[Pestilence]

rushed out? Well reading it again if thats what you mean

[derwoodly]

Now this one makes me think Moon is trying to tell us something...  and wasn\'t David Bowie in the Labyrinth?

Moon takes two pieces from a board and considers them for a moment. One is male, the other female. He puts them back down on separate boards that suddenly appear. Other pieces follow the female, but none the male. ?Lotsa things aren?t fair.?

[Moogie]

I thought that too, but can only think it has something to do with his stories, which... *glances around nervously for angry charging Arniguses* ...I still have yet to read. x.x

[Phinehas]

Hahahaha!!!!! This is absolutely brilliant! I totally cracked up when I read about Phinehas! You\'re the best!

[Under the moon]

[[@All> Thank you all so much! I am glad you are enjoying it. We had a huge fireworks party and I haven't slept for 24 hours, so the next installment may be a while whilst I recover.

But Moogie, Derwoodly, and Ayshe are on to something. Ayshe perhaps knows more, having read the first 'Chain of Souls', which the sepparation part has to do with. The peices tipping over and vanishing though, I have yet to write. But the question is...who? That is a secret I will not reveal. You will all just have to wait until it is written. [[as of this edit, still not written, but will be...someday.]]


ps. Arnigus is not in CoS....yet.]]