PlaneShift
Gameplay => Guilds Forum => Topic started by: Jurrel on January 18, 2007, 01:37:20 am
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Paladins
Smoke filled skies passed over the sands of Ojaveda. Searing heat beat down on the pools of blood that flowed like rivers. Carcasses of fallen prey, limbs sheared from bodies. The hot air was filled with the smell of blood and metal. Enkidukai, Xacha, Ylian, Diaboli, Krans -- people from all races had met there fate in this valley already. Ulbernauts, Tefusangs, Trepors, Consumers, Gobbles and more showed up in throngs to engage in the already consuming madness. Mayhem had consumed the land and confusion and hatred took hold.
Out of this came our story and how we came to be.
In the middle of the valley, seven young soldiers were fighting blindly for their guilds wishes. No purpose, reason or just cause. Blood and sweat soaked, bruised, cut and broken. They looked upon what was happening around them and watched in horror as deaths mounted at their feet. One youngster -- Mamah -- had run head on into an Ulbernaut and tried to take it on by himself. While Shambla and Elareno fought as hard as they could to catch up to him and drive off his impending doom, others made sure nothing lived within their wake.
Shambla and Elareno ended the poor Ulbernauts life but at great cost. Mamah was nearly finished. Shambla, the leader of the group , stumbled forward, having taken the brunt of the battle. Elareno steadied him." We cannot go on like this", Shambla proclaimed. Jurrel helped Rhonja and Bradius carry Mamah to a more comfortable spot. 'Mamah you need to stay near us, don't wander off like that. Death will find you ". Rhonja tried to fight back tears, for she knew it would be a while before Mamah would fight agian.
that was when it all stopped. No movement, no battle sounds. Peace. A calm glowing light fluttered around them and they were not afraid. Talad the majestic god stood before them. Mamah rose, his wounds completely healed and took his place at Jurrels side. All stood in wonder and amazement.
"My children, look around you. Look at what has been done. All of my people and the creatures in this land cry out in so much pain. Order must be restored. You are to follow a new path. The path of the righteous. Valor, bravery, loyalty, honesty and good will be your virtues. Your purpose is to teach a new way of life. A life filled with meaning. You are to be Paladins; my holy knights. Let my love and compassion be your guide. Bring order and peace to my land once more." And with that Talad dissappeared.
The Paladins found themselves in a temple free from harm in a town called Hydlaa. Alll seven of the young soldiers made a pact that day. To bring order , peace and reason into the lifes around them. And so they marched into the world as Paladins.
Ranks
Master at Arms
High Paladin
Paladin
Champion
Knight/Dame
Devout
Squire
Apprentice
Page
The rankings will eventually all have discriptions and qualifications. Rankings will be based on level achievement, trust, honesty and role playing ability. This is a guild of friends. We all get along well. Those wishing to join will have to spend some time getting to know the High Paladins. Two must be in agreement to bring you in. Understand they also have the power to remove you. Please conduct yourself with respect for others, and you will have no problems.
contact Shambla = Shambla@bresnan.net or Jurrel = Titanplus4@comcast.net
We hope to have this page finished by this weekend. Please post replys. We welcome your thoughts. Thanks for your input so far. We will have a revision soon. Be patient, it will be woth the wait. Please say whether you liked the story or not.
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I never saw laanx as that sort of god, he always seemed alot more vengeful, of those who did not respect him as their god.
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Well not vengeful as such but, Interested in him self much more then the land and it's people. Perhaps if you were ordered to spread the word of laanx then yea, that would work.
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Thank you for your input pehaps I should look closer, Thank you for your time. Be well.
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It sounds more like something Talad would do. Just don't bubble hearth on me now <_<
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Seems like Laanx came out at random. Enkidukai, not Enkidukia. Also, when did this take place? There hasn't been any mayhem like you've mentioned, as far as I know. And how are they to bring order to the land? There are hundreds of guilds that do that already.
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Talad and Laanx both had there problems. They were both young and inexperianced they both made mistakes but I have no doubt that Laanxs loved her followers and the people of the land. Like Talad she wanted the people to worship her. I see no proof that she did not like her people. So the beutiful Laanxs it is.
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Laanx wanted to hide herself from people ever since Talad ruined her beauty, and her voice changed and became deaper, which leads people to call her "he." I doubt she would just come out at random and say something like that.
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If you read farther Laanx reemerged and I didnt say what she looked or sounded like. But time heals all wounds. She is still a god and probably in that state was still beutiful to anyone one of us. She is beutiful now and this is still past your reading. Be positive.
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I advise reading the guild story as a guild story, and not necessarily an account of something that "actually happened" in game. Maybe it's true, maybe it isn't - they claim it is. We don't have to agree with their account, but they're allowed to have it.
A question for the guild: Does this mean you're all vegetarian?
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Seems like Laanx came out at random. Enkidukai, not Enkidukia. Also, when did this take place? There hasn't been any mayhem like you've mentioned, as far as I know. And how are they to bring order to the land? There are hundreds of guilds that do that already.
Thank you for spelling correction, Enkidukai . As for when it happened I will cosult with Shambla. I did not see the importance of it. Its not as easy as It looks. And as far as the mayhem, if there was a history already written all of us, then why are we here. There is only mention of gods and people and how they came to be.Whats wrong with using your imagination. Are we not writing our own history everytime we roleplay. The story is not a big stretch. I did not invent new towns or planes. As for the people in the story they exist in the game now. And our past has just been written. Our future will depend on each other. Our being good and kind is true. By showing others kindness ,all will in time be kind. We have faith in our teachings, and so will you my friend.
I advise reading the guild story as a guild story, and not necessarily an account of something that "actually happened" in game. Maybe it's true, maybe it isn't - they claim it is. We don't have to agree with their account, but they're allowed to have it.
A question for the guild: Does this mean you're all vegetarian?
Thank you Zanzibar!! and no im not a vegitarian, however if you are thats cool. I like Ulbers roasting on an open fire. The point is if no one can write a story. Then storys wont happen. O.K. everyone stop role playing. How do you know it happened?
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Seems like Laanx came out at random. Enkidukai, not Enkidukia. Also, when did this take place? There hasn't been any mayhem like you've mentioned, as far as I know. And how are they to bring order to the land? There are hundreds of guilds that do that already.
Well she could explain such mayham gripping the world if she ties her pre-guilds Battle with the rp History Monk did of Darkness escaping into our world? I do believe quite a few people rped a great evil and chaos during that time..
Just a thought...
cheers
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Thank you Anfa, your sweet we have a rivision in progess I think you will like. See you in game, and your site is sweet! \\o//
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OK, seeing as no one else has mentioned it, allow me, as the saying goes, to put the cat among the pigeons:
Paladin (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Paladin) :D
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OK, seeing as no one else has mentioned it, allow me, as the saying goes, to put the cat among the pigeons:
Paladin (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Paladin) :D
I think Jurrel's Paladin falls into the very last line of the wiki, "Fantasy paladins are usually holy warriors, combining both combat and healing abilities." I would add that they are also lawful good and lose abilities should they become unlawful, for ANY reason. For example, if a lake is posted, "No swimming by order of the King!" and there is a person drowning in the lake (yes she broke the law and found herself in trouble), the paladin will not enter the water to save her as it would violate the law. ;D
Araye
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Hey Araye! Your right about Paladins. I think you will appreciate the rewrite. Hopefully there wont be any no swimming signs. :o Hpefully I will see you in game and we can meet. In fact all the players in the story are actve so say " Hi".
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I see paladins in a different way - they are warrior monks, of knightly orders or appearance but having clerical powers. But I think that there can be paladins of any religion or value system. Why not have paladins of death and chaos, for instance?
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Hello Zanzibar! I like you. :thumbup: Its nice to here from someone who has an open mind. Just because Palladins are lawful that does not mean that they will take everthing to the extreme. And your right to Zanzsibar being good is all a matter of your own perspective. I guess there may be some that seem to be on the dark side depending on your point of view. We are on the side of good. We are helpful and kind. Thank you for your post.
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I see paladins in a different way - they are warrior monks, of knightly orders or appearance but having clerical powers. But I think that there can be paladins of any religion or value system. Why not have paladins of death and chaos, for instance?
*Cough* Alignment *Cough*
I do not recommend copying the "Paladin" concept from D&D but here is a proof of what Zanzibar said
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Paladin_(Dungeons_&_Dragons)#Third_Edition_And_3.5 (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Paladin_(Dungeons_&_Dragons)#Third_Edition_And_3.5)
"Some accessory products have created variant paladins such as the Lawful Evil Paladin of Tyranny, the Chaotic Evil Paladin of Slaughter, and the Chaotic Good Paladin of Freedom (with the base Paladin being called "Paladin of Honor")."
"...championing the extreme "corner" alignments"
"However, issue 310 of Dragon magazine featured a "Paladin" for each alignment (for example, a Neutral Good Sentinel)."
Of course Paladins could also apply as champions of a great cause, ideal or faith instead of *cough* Alignment
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just a little aside:
I was a member of The Paladins back when I first joined ps two years ago but the guild died during the summer of 05 afaik there are only a couple of us still playing
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Lordraleigh hello and thanks for your post the revision of the Paladins story is coming. You will be happy to see that what kind of Paladins we are. And yes Zanzibar is right there are different types. Once agian we are good please take my word on that. Lanser the great! Thank you for chiming in I wasnt aware that there was a Paladin group. Let me set you at ease we are an older group and are very stable. Our charactors are built well and we are involved with RP . Paladins are here to stay and we are almost ready to start.
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For a period, Laanx ruled Kadaikos harshly, giving to the Lemurs inflexible laws and a strict hierarchy. After discovering the delight of ruling his people, the Masked God became greedy for power.
Observing his regular and quiet face, Laanx remembered with nostalgia the time in which he was a beautiful lunar god. He got angry, cursing Talad and all Yliakum, and swore that, since Talad made him an unhappy and jealous being, he must suffer the consequences.
To prevent them from reaching Yliakum, Laanx sent one of his avatars to lead lure them into a cave full of water and game. He returned to study the portal, close to understanding its principle.
Seeing that the creature refused to follow his orders, Laanx became enraged and destroyed the creature by whispering a single word. During the following days, many other Klyros passed through the portal. Each time, Laanx tried to impose his will. Many of them were corrupted, tempted in many ways, or were destroyed or tortured, but none of them yielded to the god's will.
He was sure that Talad would receive him warmly, and he would be able to take advantage of this.
Sorry, Laanx always seemed a bit evil and manipulative to be a god classified as "good" to me. Perhaps if you added a bit more of a crusader attitude... but as the all around good guys that Paladins usually represent, you'd be better off choosing another god.
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Ohh John must I go over this agian. Please go to the history page and start pulling out all the bad things all the Gods did. I know you have nothing better to do than rip apart someone elses work. However if your going to do it please pay attention to the complete history. There are as many good things said about Laanxs as you pulled out bad. You could do the same thing for all the Gods . What are you star magazine.What did Laanxs do to you? I am sorry she was mean to you. Ohh and by the way what I asked is if you liked the story or not. Thanks .
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For a period, Laanx ruled Kadaikos harshly, giving to the Lemurs inflexible laws and a strict hierarchy. After discovering the delight of ruling his people, the Masked God became greedy for power.
Observing his regular and quiet face, Laanx remembered with nostalgia the time in which he was a beautiful lunar god. He got angry, cursing Talad and all Yliakum, and swore that, since Talad made him an unhappy and jealous being, he must suffer the consequences.
To prevent them from reaching Yliakum, Laanx sent one of his avatars to lead lure them into a cave full of water and game. He returned to study the portal, close to understanding its principle.
Seeing that the creature refused to follow his orders, Laanx became enraged and destroyed the creature by whispering a single word. During the following days, many other Klyros passed through the portal. Each time, Laanx tried to impose his will. Many of them were corrupted, tempted in many ways, or were destroyed or tortured, but none of them yielded to the god's will.
He was sure that Talad would receive him warmly, and he would be able to take advantage of this.
Sorry, Laanx always seemed a bit evil and manipulative to be a god classified as "good" to me. Perhaps if you added a bit more of a crusader attitude... but as the all around good guys that Paladins usually represent, you'd be better off choosing another god.
For Laanx it would probably be the following types of Paladin: "...Lawful Evil Paladin of Tyranny..."
Or perhaps some kind of Inquisition...
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Lordraleighl look at the history. Read about all the gods please dont be disrespectful. We chose a god who loves her people. I am intitaled to my opinion but dont jam yours down my throat. All the gods did terrible things. I did read the entire history so please dont asume that I did not. Talad is the one who caused Laanx to become disfigured in the first place. Having faith in something that others do not believe is hard. Talad did everthing to benifit his own ego. I can only asume that the history did not just end there. It is altogether possible that Laanx continued to heal her broken heart and began to care for her people more. Choosing Talad would be the easy choice based on early history. But at the end of that history he built a temple for himself because he was jealouse of Laanxs. We may still consider Talad but that would be the easiest choice. Give the revision a chance and realize that alot has changed in Planeshift since the history was written. Along with possibly a change in Laanx's heart. The easiest choice is not always the best choice.
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The ranks seem, os say, pointless? I'm seeing a "warrior" "good warrior" "great warrior trend goin here.
http://hydlaa.com/smf/index.php?topic=25003.0
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In answer to the comment about the ranking structure: It was taken from the history of the middle ages, and is original, with the exception that I needed 3 levels of paladin to structure things as i want them to be. Also I was not comfortable with the title of king, so we removed Reeve and King and added 2 levels of Paladin.
In answer to all the digs on jurrels story. We thought that I must be posted in order to star the guild so he posted a first draft outline. It will be revised in full form as soon as I have time to finish the finale draft. This will most likely be some time Friday night.
The you can all dig on me. :) hehehe
*edit*
all the comments are good ones. To the best of my knowlage, i have addressed tham all it the full version, Jurrel did the reasearch and worte the draft. I'm gonna ssstand by him there. however, the rewrite will fill in the hols you all have mentioned i believe. thanks for your intelegent imput. Next its my turn. I hope i diden't leave too juch for you to take apart. :)
[ Please avoid making one post right after the other in the same thread. Just "Modify" your first post to add more information. --Karyuu ]
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Ohh John must I go over this agian. Please go to the history page and start pulling out all the bad things all the Gods did. I know you have nothing better to do than rip apart someone elses work. However if your going to do it please pay attention to the complete history. There are as many good things said about Laanxs as you pulled out bad. You could do the same thing for all the Gods . What are you star magazine.What did Laanxs do to you? I am sorry she was mean to you. Ohh and by the way what I asked is if you liked the story or not. Thanks .
Petty insults won't do you any good ;)
And what I am trying to say to you, and try to wrap your mind around this as it's difficult to get any more direct than I was before, is that your story doesn't fit the settings. Talad generally was a good guy, just was impatient.
Lordraleighl look at the history. Read about all the gods please dont be disrespectful. We chose a god who loves her people. I am intitaled to my opinion but dont jam yours down my throat. All the gods did terrible things. I did read the entire history so please dont asume that I did not. Talad is the one who caused Laanx to become disfigured in the first place. Having faith in something that others do not believe is hard. Talad did everthing to benifit his own ego. I can only asume that the history did not just end there. It is altogether possible that Laanx continued to heal her broken heart and began to care for her people more. Choosing Talad would be the easy choice based on early history. But at the end of that history he built a temple for himself because he was jealouse of Laanxs. We may still consider Talad but that would be the easiest choice. Give the revision a chance and realize that alot has changed in Planeshift since the history was written. Along with possibly a change in Laanx's heart. The easiest choice is not always the best choice.
Just because someone goes against your opinion doesn't mean they're jamming it down your throat. You really must learn what constructive criticism is.
Now, for my overall opinion, which is going to be a bit more blunt now as you irritate me, the story is unimaginitive, the ranks are pointless AND unimaginitive, and the guild is unimaginitive. It's something we've all seen before, and frankly, bores me. You see, that was unconstructive criticism, learn the difference.
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/me reads over the thread.
Hmm. Of to a fair start. Most tend to listen to others though and not tell them how their god behaves without evidence. You had potential. You could've been good if you took criticism on board. Your fair start seems to be gone now. That is, untill you start to listen.
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I only mentioned the original Paladins Guild to show that it is not the first time we've had Paladins in PS
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Ahh ok I see. Like I stated before this is a rough draft. The revision is coming soon. I wouldnt know if there has been a guild like this before because I arrived six weeks ago. As long as I have been here I have seen peoples history and storys get ripped apart. Mostly all for the same reason. Its not in the history or its unimaginative. Does the history in Planeshift stand still? If I use my imagination Im wrong. If I stay with history Im unimaginative. The rankings do have a pupose. I agree there are to many Paladin positions that will probably change. I also stated that we were considering changing the god. If we did change the god would we be more like everyone else. Would that be unimaginative? Is it possible that Laanxs embrasses the people that worship her?
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Lord Paladin
High Paladin
Paladin
Lord
Baron/Baroness
Knight/Dame
Squire
Page
Peasant
I'm not sure these ranks are proper for a Paladin Guild. Why? Because these ranks barely refer to the lawful, good nature of Paladins, rather to a lordship hierarchy. If it's a Paladin guild, it should be composed of Paladins and those striving to become such, not mainly Peasants and Lords, and the other non-Paladin ranks that outweight.
I wouldn't join your guild, seeing that I would be called a peasant by people who should treat me with honor and goodness. I'd admit being called recruit, Page and Squire, not a peasant. Plus, I would be demotivated also by the high hierarchic rank it takes to be a Paladin. One would think it would take much effort to become a true Paladin. However climbing in hierarchic level, and nobility level as it seems, doesn't seem to fit. Paladins can be charismatic leaders, or charismatic lone fighters. All they need to be is heroic, not go around commanding others at their whims.
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I do need to learn to take critisism better. Understand this is a first for me. I understand there are things wrong with the story and rankings. It is still the first draft. I posted it to find out if people liked the story or not and why. I am listening to all that you have all said. There dicussions going on with all the players within our group to decide what to do. It is not all up to me.
*edit*
Thank you Sangwa! That you make a great point. We should have one Paladin not three and if peasant is offensive that can be changed. How could we make rankings work. Any suggestions? By the way you guys win the group has decided to change to Taled. We decided if we wanted to keep Paladin and be sucessful we would have to change. I do listen to all your points, however I do not make the decisions by myself . What a relief. :woot:
[ Please avoid making one post right after the other in the same thread. Just "Modify" your first post to add more information. --Karyuu ]
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@Jurrel, I raise my visor to you. You have taken a lot of criticism and suggestions the "community" has offered and continued to improve your original idea instead of just arguing and defending the original concept as typically happens in these threads. We could all learn a lot from you.
And I too agree with Zanzi that a paladin's definition is only limited by the creativity of the player. I defined it based on Jurrel's desire to have a LG Paladin. But I see no reason there could not be an order of Black Flame Paladins too.
I look forward to meeting this guild in game and also look forward to rev. 2!
Araye Bayebes
The Enlightened
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Hello all the rewrite is posted ! Go see it. Posted by Shambla i will still reply though your comments are welcome. Be well, and see you all in game. :whistling: