PlaneShift

Fan Area => The Hydlaa Plaza => Topic started by: WiseKran on February 16, 2007, 02:16:10 pm

Title: Google is God, spread the good word.
Post by: WiseKran on February 16, 2007, 02:16:10 pm
The Church of Google

link: www.thechurchofgoogle.org

Proof:
Quote
PROOF #1

Google is all-knowing (Omniscient). She indexes over 9.5 billion WebPages, which is more than any other search engine on the web today. Not only is Google all-knowing, but She also sorts through this vast amount of data using Her patented PageRank method, making said data accessible for us mere mortals.

PROOF #2

Google is everywhere at once (Omnipresent). Google's search engine is virtually everywhere on earth at the same time. Billions of indexed WebPages hosted from every corner of the earth. With the proliferation of Wi-Fi networks, you will eventually be able to access Google from anywhere on earth, truly making Her an omnipresent entity.

PROOF #3

Google answers prayers. One can pray to Google by doing a search for whatever question or problem is plaguing them. As an example, you can quickly find information on alternative cancer treatments, ways to improve your health, new and innovative medical discoveries and generally anything that resembles a typical prayer. Ask Google and She will show you the way, but showing you is all She can do, for you must help yourself from that point on.

PROOF #4

Google is immortal. She cannot be considered a physical being such as ourselves. Her Algorithms are spread out across many servers; if any of which were taken down or damaged, another would undoubtedly take its place. Google can theoretically last forever.

PROOF #5

Google is infinite. The Internet can theoretically grow forever, and Google will forever index its infinite growth.

PROOF #6

Google remembers all. Google caches WebPages regularly and stores them on its massive servers. In fact, by uploading your thoughts and opinions to the internet, you will forever live on in Google's cache, even after you die.

PROOF #7

Google can "do no evil" (Omnibenevolent). Part of Google's corporate philosophy is the belief that a company can make money without being evil.

PROOF #8

Evidence of Google's existence is abundant. There is more evidence for the existence of Google than any other God worshiped today. Extraordinary evidence requires extraordinary proof. If seeing is believing, then surf over to www.google.com and experience for yourself Google's awesome power.

--http://www.thechurchofgoogle.org/Scripture/Proof_Google_Is_God.html



Join the church of google today, and observe the 10 commandments! be saved.


What do you all think?


Title: Re: Google is God, spread the good word.
Post by: dying_inside on February 16, 2007, 02:30:39 pm
I think that rocks.
Title: Re: Google is God, spread the good word.
Post by: bilbous on February 16, 2007, 05:18:41 pm
I think that idle minds make for odd pastimes.

I also think animated sigs are annoying but that is just me, don't change on my account. I think a lot more but it would take too long to post what all I think.
To rephrase:
It seems pretty silly.
Were there many ads on the page? Thank you for sparing us them.
Title: Re: Google is God, spread the good word.
Post by: emeraldfool on February 16, 2007, 05:25:52 pm
...
Why is Google a woman?
Title: Re: Google is God, spread the good word.
Post by: lordraleigh on February 16, 2007, 05:35:04 pm
As a promoter of scientifical rationality against the mysticism and fanaticism that leads people to invent more and more senseless sects and cults like the Heaven's Gate (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Heaven%27s_Gate_%28cult%29) that lead people to commit acts of insanity and to end their own lifes, and as a tireless advocate of agnosticism over leaps of faith, I therefore present my set of evidences against this new and flawed cult:

1 ) Google cares little about your faith, but cares much about profits.

2 ) Google is immortal as long as a huge economical crisis doesn't happen leading Google Corporation to bankruptcy, otherwise it will die along the corporation

3) If Google is a god, the Peoples Republic of China they support is a democracy or they would be sent to hell for killing countless of political prisoners, protesters, workers on strike, etc.

4 ) Google is finite, once the server is filled it will need to expand on another server, but eventually it will occupy so many rooms that will reach its limit.

5 ) Google stores large amounts of information, not all, but a wide system failure may eliminate it promptly.

6 ) Google can't do any evil, ask the insurgents caught by PRC's political police with the aid of Google about it.

7 ) Google exists, but does not improve or act by itself, instead requires human action that is processed leading it to its deeds, therefore Google isn't a manifestation of intelligence.

8 ) Google won't answer your existencial doubts about afterlife, universe, etc. Only will bring you even more doubts as it will lead you to hundreds of sites defending hundreds of different philosophical, metaphysical and religious points of view. Thus Google isn't the path to truth.
Title: Re: Google is God, spread the good word.
Post by: emeraldfool on February 16, 2007, 05:43:15 pm
Google? Immortal?

One word: Electromagnetic-Pulse (http://tinwiki.org/wiki/Electromagnetic_Pulse_Bomb)
Title: Re: Google is God, spread the good word.
Post by: Idoru on February 16, 2007, 05:43:29 pm
As a promoter of scientifical rationality against the mysticism and fanaticism that leads people to invent more and more senseless sects and cults like the Heaven's Gate (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Heaven%27s_Gate_%28cult%29) that lead people to commit acts of insanity and to end their own lifes, and as a tireless advocate of agnosticism over leaps of faith, I therefore present my set of evidences against this new and flawed cult:

1 ) Google cares little about your faith, but cares much about profits.

2 ) Google is immortal as long as a huge economical crisis doesn't happen leading Google Corporation to bankruptcy, otherwise it will die along the corporation

3) If Google is a god, the Peoples Republic of China they support is a democracy or they would be sent to hell for killing countless of political prisoners, protesters, workers on strike, etc.

4 ) Google is finite, once the server is filled it will need to expand on another server, but eventually it will occupy so many rooms that will reach its limit.

5 ) Google stores large amounts of information, not all, but a wide system failure may eliminate it promptly.

6 ) Google can't do any evil, ask the insurgents caught by PRC's political police with the aid of Google about it.

7 ) Google exists, but does not improve or act by itself, instead requires human action that is processed leading it to its deeds, therefore Google isn't a manifestation of intelligence.

8 ) Google won't answer your existencial doubts about afterlife, universe, etc. Only will bring you even more doubts as it will lead you to hundreds of sites defending hundreds of different philosophical, metaphysical and religious points of view. Thus Google isn't the path to truth.

Several of those certainly make it sound even more like a religion ;)
Title: Re: Google is God, spread the good word.
Post by: lordraleigh on February 16, 2007, 05:46:44 pm
Google? Immortal?

One word: Electromagnetic-Pulse (http://tinwiki.org/wiki/Electromagnetic_Pulse_Bomb)

Amen skeptic brother!  :thumbup:
Title: Re: Google is God, spread the good word.
Post by: bilbous on February 16, 2007, 05:49:02 pm
You might have to blanket the earth with your pulse to ensure you got every last data node or it would survive.
Title: Re: Google is God, spread the good word.
Post by: lordraleigh on February 16, 2007, 05:58:35 pm
There's one thing that can destroy Google for sure.

An Economic Crash like the one of 1929 (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Wall_Street_Crash_of_1929) multiplied tenfold. Or of course, the "Great Satan", Micro$oft  :P
Title: Re: Google is God, spread the good word.
Post by: Annah on February 16, 2007, 06:37:08 pm
What do I think? You need a girl.

:P
Title: Re: Google is God, spread the good word.
Post by: emeraldfool on February 16, 2007, 07:39:07 pm


(He means a real girl, not Google 'herself' :P)


You might have to blanket the earth with your pulse to ensure you got every last data node or it would survive.

How do you mean? Surely completely wiping Google's mainframe destroy the corporation, or at least make the engine so slow (due to every page having to be individually loaded from each individual site) that nobody would use it.
Title: Re: Google is God, spread the good word.
Post by: Kiirani on February 17, 2007, 12:54:46 am
All Hail Google, I love this :)
Title: Re: Google is God, spread the good word.
Post by: neko kyouran on February 17, 2007, 02:49:27 am
I think everyone should eat more muffins.

All hail the muffin man!

He lives on Drury Lane.
Title: Re: Google is God, spread the good word.
Post by: lordraleigh on February 17, 2007, 03:30:48 am
The Google Watch (http://www.google-watch.org/) denies this fanatic religion as nonsense.
Title: Re: Google is God, spread the good word.
Post by: One and only tanner on February 17, 2007, 04:11:54 am
Prase! google with out it id have neaver found planeshift! AND who* the hell would set off a world wide electromagnetic pulse just the prove that its not imortal?!! i mean who!?  ???  ???


Blueberry mufins!
Title: Re: Google is God, spread the good word.
Post by: Kiirani on February 17, 2007, 06:36:37 am
Immortal doesn't necessarily mean invincible. In this case, immortal means that Google won't give up and die of old age, she can live indefinitely given servers to live on.

At least, that's how I interpret it.
Title: Re: Google is God, spread the good word.
Post by: lordraleigh on February 17, 2007, 06:45:34 am
Prase! google with out it id have neaver found planeshift! AND who* the hell would set off a world wide electromagnetic pulse just the prove that its not imortal?!! i mean who!?  ???  ???


Blueberry mufins!

In the Soviet Union, Google is Searched by YOU!!

Another way of destroying Google: A "proletarian revolution"  :P
Title: Re: Google is God, spread the good word.
Post by: One and only tanner on February 17, 2007, 11:16:08 am
or for the pure fun of it u could make a super A.I virus who's only goal is to wipe out google then spiales outa control and sets off a nuke and blows up america ^_^ then the radioactive meterial flys into the atomostfear and comes back to england and mutates us all into mindless freaks bent on eating human flesh and before u know it the human race is gone. and dolfines become the most cleaver speaices on the planet

And the forum needs a spellcheck --__--
Title: Re: Google is God, spread the good word.
Post by: neko kyouran on February 17, 2007, 11:23:20 am
It does,  it's just disabled right now, because we got yelled at from the server owners hosting the forum for using up too much cpu time when it was enabled.  Try Firefox 2.0, it has a built in spell checker.  :)
Title: Re: Google is God, spread the good word.
Post by: One and only tanner on February 17, 2007, 11:24:22 am
iv got firefox just dn witch version but i dout its 2 cos it don't have a spell check

Edit: and once again no one has any idea what the whole point of this thred was in the first place as now we are on about spellchecks :)
Title: Re: Google is God, spread the good word.
Post by: emeraldfool on February 17, 2007, 02:35:29 pm
Prase! google with out it id have neaver found planeshift! AND who* the hell would set off a world wide electromagnetic pulse just the prove that its not imortal?!! i mean who!?  ???  ???


Blueberry mufins!

In the Soviet Union, Google is Searched by YOU!!

Another way of destroying Google: A "proletarian revolution"  :P

Um... Google IS searched by me :P
Title: Re: Google is God, spread the good word.
Post by: Parallo on February 17, 2007, 02:37:48 pm
As it should be. What makes a god? Something that created us and everything else. Wheres the proof of that? Saying that there being evidence of Google's existance is a proof that Google is god is like me saying that I'm god because there is sufficent evidence that I exist.
Title: Re: Google is God, spread the good word.
Post by: neko kyouran on February 17, 2007, 03:05:06 pm
I don't think I exist.  I think I may be a figment of my own imagination.
Title: Re: Google is God, spread the good word.
Post by: Parallo on February 17, 2007, 03:24:35 pm
There is as much chance of you not existing as there is of Google not existing therefore there is as much chance of you being god as Google. That 'proof' is absurd.

Much like these (http://www.godlessgeeks.com/LINKS/GodProof.htm).
Title: Re: Google is God, spread the good word.
Post by: emeraldfool on February 17, 2007, 04:04:55 pm
I don't think I exist.  I think I may be a figment of my own imagination.

It isn't possible to be a figment of your own imagination. That's a paradox. If you were a figment of your own imagination then you wouldn't have an imagination.

Stop trying to make the universe implode Nek...
Title: Re: Google is God, spread the good word.
Post by: One and only tanner on February 17, 2007, 04:33:54 pm
well if google is a god its done more that that other guy who called him/herself god  \\o//
Title: Re: Google is God, spread the good word.
Post by: lordraleigh on February 17, 2007, 05:12:49 pm
There is as much chance of you not existing as there is of Google not existing therefore there is as much chance of you being god as Google. That 'proof' is absurd.

Much like these (http://www.godlessgeeks.com/LINKS/GodProof.htm).

Pray that Datruth won't see this!
Title: Re: Google is God, spread the good word.
Post by: Parallo on February 17, 2007, 05:19:31 pm
Heh, we can only hope :P
Title: Re: Google is God, spread the good word.
Post by: emeraldfool on February 17, 2007, 06:05:39 pm
There is as much chance of you not existing as there is of Google not existing therefore there is as much chance of you being god as Google. That 'proof' is absurd.

Much like these (http://www.godlessgeeks.com/LINKS/GodProof.htm).

Pray that Datruth won't see this!

Haven't seen him in a while... Not since that whole petition thang.
Title: Re: Google is God, spread the good word.
Post by: lordraleigh on February 17, 2007, 09:46:22 pm
As a promoter of scientifical rationality against the mysticism and fanaticism that leads people to invent more and more senseless sects and cults like the Heaven's Gate (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Heaven%27s_Gate_%28cult%29) that lead people to commit acts of insanity and to end their own lifes, and as a tireless advocate of agnosticism over leaps of faith, I therefore present my set of evidences against this new and flawed cult:

1 ) Google cares little about your faith, but cares much about profits.

2 ) Google is immortal as long as a huge economical crisis doesn't happen leading Google Corporation to bankruptcy, otherwise it will die along the corporation

3) If Google is a god, the Peoples Republic of China they support is a democracy or they would be sent to hell for killing countless of political prisoners, protesters, workers on strike, etc.

4 ) Google is finite, once the server is filled it will need to expand on another server, but eventually it will occupy so many rooms that will reach its limit.

5 ) Google stores large amounts of information, not all, but a wide system failure may eliminate it promptly.

6 ) Google can't do any evil, ask the insurgents caught by PRC's political police with the aid of Google about it.

7 ) Google exists, but does not improve or act by itself, instead requires human action that is processed leading it to its deeds, therefore Google isn't a manifestation of intelligence.

8 ) Google won't answer your existencial doubts about afterlife, universe, etc. Only will bring you even more doubts as it will lead you to hundreds of sites defending hundreds of different philosophical, metaphysical and religious points of view. Thus Google isn't the path to truth.

Several of those certainly make it sound even more like a religion ;)

One of them strike me as pretty familiar :P

1) We care little about your faith, but about our profits (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Universal_Church_of_the_Kingdom_of_God)
Title: Re: Google is God, spread the good word.
Post by: Atomica on February 17, 2007, 10:22:27 pm
One of them strike me as pretty familiar :P

1) We care little about your faith, but about our profits (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Universal_Church_of_the_Kingdom_of_God)

Oh Lord, you are baaad
Title: Re: Google is God, spread the good word.
Post by: neko kyouran on February 17, 2007, 11:38:49 pm
I don't think I exist.  I think I may be a figment of my own imagination.

It isn't possible to be a figment of your own imagination. That's a paradox. If you were a figment of your own imagination then you wouldn't have an imagination.

Stop trying to make the universe implode Nek...

I'd like you to meet my friend, Mr. Schrödinger.  He's got a wonderful little cat.

Edit:  I exist, but yet I don't exist, all at the same time.  Maybe.  Sometimes.   :devil:
Title: Re: Google is God, spread the good word.
Post by: bilbous on February 18, 2007, 01:08:01 am
Jees I keep telling you folks .... Grey Blobs is where it's at, if we all believe Google doesn't exist it certainly will cease to exist.
Title: Re: Google is God, spread the good word.
Post by: lordraleigh on February 18, 2007, 02:30:24 am
FACT: Google doesn't exist! It's a conspiracy created to delude us!!!!I It's a disguise for a powerful surveillance system called ECHELON (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/ECHELON)!!!! The CIA and the NSA Controls GOOGLE!!!

annoying scrolling text removed.  --neko.


*Added Note: It didn't annoy me when I put it on preview. I guess it annoys others then  ???
Title: Re: Google is God, spread the good word.
Post by: One and only tanner on February 19, 2007, 12:09:40 am
CIA? THE CIA ARE RETARDS ENLESS THEY ARE READIN THEN THERE GREAT p.s don't hurt me p.s i live in a big white building in america OTHER WISE THERE ARE RETAREDS AND WE ALL KNOW ITS BEEN CONTROLED BY MI5!
Title: Re: Google is God, spread the good word.
Post by: lordraleigh on February 19, 2007, 12:27:23 am
*A M.I.B. laughs somewhere due to what a surveillance system wrongly pointed him as a potential sign of terrorism
Title: Re: Google is God, spread the good word.
Post by: lordraleigh on February 21, 2007, 01:21:26 am
Are you hopeless in your life?

Start your own Religion! (http://uncyclopedia.org/wiki/HowTo:Start_a_Religion)
Title: Re: Google is God, spread the good word.
Post by: One and only tanner on February 22, 2007, 08:06:20 pm
Are you hopeless in your life?

Start your own Religion! (http://uncyclopedia.org/wiki/HowTo:Start_a_Religion)

Ohahahahaa oh god i love it i mite start one