PlaneShift

Fan Area => Roleplaying (Communitive Storywriting) => Poetry, Comedy, and other. => Topic started by: Kahlisi on March 22, 2003, 11:06:31 pm

Title: Poetry - A Berserker Am I
Post by: Kahlisi on March 22, 2003, 11:06:31 pm

A Berserker Am I

My coiled rage
Leapt toward the sky,
Against all sanity
Ones thoughts defy.
A Berserker,
Impious, am I.

Sick serrated blade
Flew askant my sigh,
Never in crimson
Worlds should one cry.
A Berserker,
Thirsty, am I.

Only the Gods
Can hear my plea,
Hungry solitude
Amidst such hot debris.
A Berserker
Is what I be.

From intense cravings
Can a soul flee?
These soiled hands
Cannot rest by bent knee.
A Berserker
Is what I be.

Lewd tunes harken
Those around me die.
With demonic blood
Shall fair wrath supply.
A Berserker,
Insatiable, am I.

Life sat ahead
And Death behind, awry;
How long can
This Fate I deny?
A Berserker,
Mortal, am I.

- Kahlisidryn \"Kahlisi\" Seirpo
Bard

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Post by: Ravenmaster on March 24, 2003, 03:05:30 pm

Once again, another beautiful job, Khalisi.  Stanzas 3 and 4 end strangely though. Is what I be. It doesn\'t sound right with the rest of it.

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Post by: Kahlisi on March 24, 2003, 03:18:45 pm

Raven...  It\'s \"Kahlisi\", not \"Khalisi\".   ;)

As for the \"Is what I be.\" part of Stanzas 3 and 4, I wanted to change the rhyming scheme so the poem would not get tired.  Secondly, it illustrates a sort of lack in thinking on the Berserker\'s part - that is, after all, what they do in their rage (not think).  Incoherent speech, etc...  :))

If you look at the \"A Berserker (enter spare word) am I.\" and \"A Berserker is what I be.\"  They are technically both a bit Yoda-ish in sentence structure.  It is not just the third and fourth stanzas.

My poetry runs incredibly deeper than most can initially see, which is why I recommend reading poetry - not just mine - more than once, picking it apart bit by bit to see the meaning.

I am glad you liked it though and were not too frightened to admit something you thought was off!  Thanks again.

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Post by: Ravenmaster on March 24, 2003, 03:35:15 pm

Quote

Originally posted by Kahlisi
Raven...  It\'s \"Kahlisi\", not \"Khalisi\".   ;)

Sorry, I was probably just typing fast.

Quote

Originally posted by Kahlisi
If you look at the \"A Berserker (enter spare word) am I.\" and \"A Berserker is what I be.\"  They are technically both a bit Yoda-ish in sentence structure.  It is not just the third and fourth stanzas.

yes, sort of like Yoda, but he would have just said A Berserker I be.  The \"is what\" just doesn\'t sound right to me.

Quote

Originally posted by Kahlisi
My poetry runs incredibly deeper than most can initially see, which is why I recommend reading poetry - not just mine - more than once, picking it apart bit by bit to see the meaning.

Introduction to Poetry
 
I ask them to take a poem
and hold it up to the light
like a color slide

or press an ear against its hive.

I say drop a mouse into a poem
and watch him probe his way out,

or walk inside the poem\'s room
and feel the walls for a light switch.

I want them to waterski
across the surface of a poem
waving at the author\'s name on the shore.

But all they want to do
is tie the poem to a chair with rope
and torture a confession out of it.

They begin beating it with a hose
to find out what it really means.

-Billy Collins

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Post by: Ravenmaster on March 24, 2003, 07:25:29 pm

Kahlisi, you\'re a member now!!! Good job!

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Post by: Kahlisi on March 24, 2003, 07:56:26 pm

Yesh, I justa gotz prozmoted tidayh cuz i h4V3 1337 \\/\\/r1t1|\\|G skylz,,,......,./  c0\\/\\/ER b3pH0R3 /\\/\\e d00dz!!!!!!! i m Inv3nC4bel

Heehee, thanks for noticing, Raven.  And now I shall have fun writing abusive NPC Dialogue, insanely hard quests, useless skills, and items forged of pop-cycle sticks so they\'re easily flammable; for PlaneShift.   :D

All joking aside, however.  It is a great honor to be brought aboard with such talented individuals and I cannot wait to begin working with them to make PlaneShift everything it can be.  I have many dreams, ideas, and goodies brewing about in this head that I would love to see implimented and used for fun.  Thankfully, the leaders of the PS Project feel I am talented enough to do so.  I will not let them - or this community - down.  *steps away from the podium*

(EDIT: Yes, I am part of the Settings Department.)

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Post by: Kiern on March 24, 2003, 09:10:28 pm

good job Kahlisi, you must be really good to get them to bother to notice you :P

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Post by: Ravenmaster on March 25, 2003, 04:40:36 pm

You must have read her stuff, Kiern.  It\'s awesome.  I love you Kahlisi!

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Post by: ehrnum on May 02, 2003, 12:06:53 am

che figata!!!!!!!!!!!1


cooollll

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Post by: chrischoo on May 03, 2003, 12:54:40 am

Congratulations Kahlisi it\'s great to know that you\'re now part of the PS team! Your poetic ability is unmatched in the Planeshift realm 8) PS is pretty much a visual thing now but with your help I think we\'re all looking forward to more solid content.