PlaneShift
Fan Area => Roleplaying (Communitive Storywriting) => Topic started by: bloodedIrishman on October 10, 2009, 10:11:00 pm
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Note that this is not random poetry. It is designed with some meaningful critique to aspects of the playerbase. Satire is essentially the use of sarcasm, irony and ridicule to denounce something.The satire posts beginning from 1 and on are told from a speakers voice, between breaths, and no consistency in structure or rhyming is followed.
Satire Introduction, 1-10 are now in the topic
Satire Introduction
An old man rises from a cot, coughing while the cold causes him to shudder. He walks over to the window and closes it, cursing himself for his forgetfulness. He looks about his room and smiles.
An hour later he walks out of his home, a sturdy two room house, built years ago by his dead brother. Running a lined hand through his graying hair, he looks out the door. A large green field stands before his home, as it always did. Tall green trees line the distance, and the clouds lazily extend over the sky. He chuckles, and is once more reminded of the circular nature of things. He remembers his days as a child, wandering the very same field, playing with his brother.
Squinting, he stares intently at the field. He sees a figure walking slowly across it, in the direction of the house. When the figure comes closer, the old man notices the weary expression and hunched back. Calling in a surprisingly loud voice the old man yells, "Get inside you wandering fool!".
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(I enjoyed it :) Nice work on your piece. I do have one thing though.. Would this not fit better in the story writing section of the forum?)
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I've begun a storyline in the roleplay (communitive writing) section and a series of light hearted wisdom pieces. I did not want to overflow it. Thankyou for the compliment, I enjoyed writing it.
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Those who know me, know that i love to tell stories when i am casually mining, at the oja mines of course. I have never given it thought that i should right down my stories [in planeshift] OOC (I guess that i am too tied up with being a writer as it is!) Great story by the way keep the satire bleeding :devil:
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I intend to continously make pieces. In the realm of satire, I am sometimes lacking in ideas.
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Just realised which guild or guild type he was writing poetry about. Very funny hehe
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One.
The Lords of Lolling, LoL (Masters of Move)
Hail traveler, shall I tell you a tale?
There, take a seat,
A windstorm is about, but it is fitting, this gale,
I shall deliver to you a stirring tale, of great feats
Once, in this vast land there was a man,
Born out of cruel oppression,
From his troubles, he had not ran,
His courage had not diminished under this suppression,
He gathered about him men of great intelligence,
Of strength and wisdom,
From that point, he has not been alone since,
Generic sabers and plate armor they did don,
They set upon themselves to become stronger,
To defeat their oppressors,
The hunted to become the hunter,
Days upon days were spent, defeating monsters in a routine,
They echoed their rousing cry,
It has been a long time since I’ve heard it
Ah, yes, I remember it, ever so clearly now!
“We travel about; we dance to music, and are not fearful!”
They became stronger, oh yes, some having one hundred lessons in many skills from great masters of combat!
They now saw their chance to slay their oppressors, their foes,
Gathering together in the plaza, he drew his sword,
Seeing others, with bare armor and minute battle experience
He called for war!
These others were their oppressors, and they thirsted for vengeance,
No matter the octarchal rules,
They etched their stirring cry!
“We travel about; we dance to music, and are not fearful!”
They had defeated all their enemies, those who had oppressed them for so long!
The injustice, the injustice! They cried,
Had been vanquished,
Once more, on the bodies of their oppressors, they cried their motto!
“We travel about; we dance to music, and are not fearful!”
Some have accused them of rank hypocrisy, hah!
How could these champions of the blade,
These heroes of mindless hacking and slashing ever, ever
Be considered hypocritical?
A damnable lie!
They did not draw blades in the plaza to reveal their ignorance
They did not spend hours droning upon a spawned monster to avoid the central aspects of Yliakum life!
No, they drew their blades because they had to!
No, they spent hours droning on a spawned monster because it’s what this is all about!
I consider those who admonish these people based on their words and actions as illogical!
Irrational!
Unreasonable!
Traveler it appears I have talked for hours,
And you are famished from the journey,
Rest in the house while I prepare the meal,
And let the tale simmer in your mind
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I am dissapointed that the victims of my satire do not understand it's meaning or whom it targets.
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Two.
The Mighty n00b pwner (Griefer)
Good afternoon traveler,
You have risen to the sunshine,
While you eat I will tell you a tale,
Of a Gladiator!
The grand Arena,
Its every floor filled with danger,
But one pit retains the mightiest warriors,
Named the Dlayo Gladiators,
There combatants from across Yliakum came,
Seeking to test their mettle,
There they would find true battle,
Against warriors of equal strength,
Our Gladiator heard of this pit,
And sought it thus,
Coming upon it he saw a flow of fighters,
Seeking engagement with another,
His first day,
He donned his axes, his plate armor, and his battle helm,
And charged thus into the fray,
Attacking any who entered,
Those unawares,
And those alert to the danger,
Novices fell before his blades,
And veterans died beneath his backstabs,
He was honorable!
Friends sought vengeance,
And he was conspicuously gone,
Not hiding, no! But busy,
Daily he came to the pit,
Shouting his cry!
“I freakin pwned your ass!”
And soon the combatants came to know him,
This great Gladiator,
Who spit on corpses and bowed to them,
Shouting his cry!
“I freakin pwned your ass!”
Our Gladiator heard of a rogue camp in the wilds,
And sought it, yet he observed it lacking,
They say; it did not have novices to catch unawares,
And veterans to backstab,
Bah! All lies!
He returned to the pit,
And sought these foes,
Others have said it was a crutch for his pitiful roleplaying!
Yet to this day, I do not know of what they speak,
They simply are denying his obvious greatness,
They cannot see the splendor of his legacy!
The intelligence behind his cry!
“I freakin pwned your ass!”
And once more I hear it in the distance,
It rings in my ears
Traveler you have finished your meal,
It is time then to gather wood,
For the coming meal, and the night,
Grip the axe and I might tell you another on the way
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Three.
The Critics of the Founders (Some critics of Planeshift Devs)
Traveler it is a beautiful day,
The sun shines down and renews us,
Our weary bones strengthened,
Our minds free of worry for the time being
While we journey to the woods,
I’ll tell the tale of a village,
Its history one of domination,
And inhumanity,
It was spawned from cutthroats and villains,
Few in number,
They were focused on evil intents,
And malign designs,
They created a despotic government,
These rogues and sadists,
Creating homes for the homeless,
And food for the hungry,
The houses they built were well structured,
And done with hard work,
Each formed with time and effort,
All for the sake of immorality,
Other men and woman came to live in the village,
And they were dignified and upright citizens,
They were offered free housing,
With food and drink,
The cutthroats charged merely the help of the citizens,
If it would please them,
What vile and twisted manner of extortion!
And soon the upstanding citizens became slaves,
Their slave overseers brutal,
And working the citizens to the bone,
The founders were tyrants!
Bent on annihilation of good!
Some have said that the founders were decent men,
And that they were merely doing good deeds,
Lies, lies, and lies!
They clearly were malicious and cruel!
Certain citizens critiqued the cutthroats,
Calling them lazy and unable to achieve,
That they were liars,
And thieves,
The founders were tyrants!
Bent on annihilation of good!
Some have said that those certain citizens were hypocrites,
For naming problems but no solutions,
For accusing the founders without basis,
Or any worth whatsoever,
The cutthroats expanded the town slowly but surely,
And it grew consistently centered on hard work,
While many citizens still enslaved over their toils,
And the certain citizens created underground resistances,
The founders were tyrants!
Bent on annihilation of good!
Lo! They were brave these certain citizens,
Standing against the tide of evil,
They were the bulwark of righteousness,
And true justice!
Some have said that these certain citizens were the problem themselves,
That their critiques being unfounded only hurt the expansion of the village,
That they simply had the choice to leave if they disagreed,
That they had much handed to them but still found many problems where there were none,
The founders were tyrants!
Bent on annihilation of good!
The cutthroats merely continued their endeavor,
Knowing many people saw it was inherently good,
And based on fine intentions and works,
All the while the resistance lived on,
Some have said that the certain citizens always had the chance to help,
And partake in the village’s flourishing,
As many others did,
What illusion is this?
The founders were tyrants!
Bent on annihilation of good!
They were cruelly forced to labor,
And suppressed of their opinions,
And oppressed to the bitter end,
I cannot bear the cutthroats sins!
It is clear now that the cutthroats were pure evil,
And on a solid foundation critiqued,
And the certain citizens infallible in their criticisms,
That the village is a stain upon the land,
We near the woods,
And you are warned that dangers lurk ahead,
But for now let us taste the fruits of nature,
While we enjoy each others company
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Four.
Demigods; 'The Invincible'! (Godmodders)
Friend we come upon the woods,
A realm of ancient beings,
You will find the terrible here,
And the wondrous,
While we walk through the woods,
I will tell you another tale,
One of ‘the invincible'!
There are those in this world friend,
That are gifted with enormous power,
They are called ‘the invincible’!
By the hand of the Gods they were blessed!
Friend, they are ‘demigods’
They cannot be defeated!
Their defenses are indestructible, as a God!
Their armor cannot be penetrated,
Their defensive skills without flaw,
They themselves are a moving wall of steel!
Friend, they are ‘demigods’
They cannot be defeated!
Their speed is Godlike!
They are very swift over land,
And fast on their toes,
They cannot be hit; no matter the foe!
Friend, they are ‘demigods’
They cannot be defeated!
Their strength is Herculean!
Unbelievably strong; they can crush anyone,
They can lift any boulder,
Push any mountain,
Wield any weapon!
Friend, they are ‘demigods’
They cannot be defeated!
Some have said that they are too scared to fight correctly,
Some have said that these demigods are arrogant,
And a pain to be with,
But I cannot comprehend how they would be so; since their power is clearly real!
Friend, they are ‘demigods’
They cannot be defeated!
Some have titled them ‘godmodders’,
But still; what do they mean?!
They are clearly born with that power,
And they clearly are that strong,
There is no doubt about it!
Friend, they are ‘demigods’
They cannot be defeated!
They come to this land,
And when they fight,
They cannot be beaten,
And thus they earn the undeserved title of ‘godmodder’
Friend; do you doubt my words?
What, you say if the demigod counters every attack it is unreal?
LIES!
What, you say if the demigod has AFTER SITTING AROUND IN TAVERNS THE WHOLE TIME can suddenly defeat anyone, is a load of bull?
LIES!
What, you say if the demigod doesn’t have the stats and skills whatsoever to back up their actions they are full of it?
Firstly, what are ‘stats and skills’ friend?
Oh, you say they are the ACCUMULATION OF A PERSONS FIGHTING EXPERIENCE AND CAPABILITY, THUS IF THEIR STATS AND SKILLS ARE NOT HIGH ENOUGH, ITS UNLIKELY THEY COULD BE AS STRONG AS THEY PRETEND TO BE?
LIES!
Nonetheless friend,
I say these demigods are not ‘godmodders’,
No!
I say they are true fighters, true warriors!
We have passed through the forest for quite some time,
And it grows darker,
And the journey becomes more dangerous,
But yet, sun still shines above us; lighting the path,
Stand close, and let us find a suitable tree
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I am dissapointed that the victims of my satire do not understand it's meaning or whom it targets.
Very entertaining, I must say. Keep up the good work :lol:
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Five.
True Zealots of Dakkru! (Cafeteria Dakkruists)
Friend I believe this is the tree,
Yes, go ahead and begin chopping,
And while you do so,
I will tell you another tale!
Of devoted Dakkru zealots!
You know of Dakkru,
Goddess of the Death Realm,
Lady of passing,
And matron of cutthroats,
Overseer of the natural cycle of life and death,
Her followers meant to maintain the cycle,
By supplying her with tribute,
By their justified killing,
Sustaining the natural world,
Master of the Death Realm,
Her gaze watches over the Death Realm,
Her followers meant to pass through,
Read her tomes and grasp the knowledge she hands them,
It is their home,
These are what the true zealots of Dakkru must be
And clearly in our land,
None of her zealots have defiled these guidelines,
Desecrated her revelations,
Or become ignorant to their purpose,
Her followers are all devout to her every word,
Some have said that some zealots have become cafeteria Dakkruists,
Walking along and choosing what they like,
Nitpicking their beliefs,
Randomly choosing their ideals,
As if the faith is for the undecided,
Her followers are all well educated in her teachings,
Some have said that some zealots have become stupidly ignorant of the Lady’s word,
That they take on the façade of Dakkruism,
And make up beliefs and teachings of Dakkru,
And act in a way that is unbefitting to a true fanatic of the faith,
Her followers do not assume the standard of Dakkru as a façade,
Some have said that some zealots disguise themselves as a Dakkruist for no reason,
Lying of their religious disposition and shaming the name,
Wandering around and saying, “May Dakkru always give you a shadow to hide in”
Wearing stupid pendants to show they are followers,
Her followers are not complacent, passive vagabonds who do not bloody their hands,
Some have said that some zealots do not take up the sword when it is their duty,
Becoming peaceful and accepting those who Dakkru calls to be executed,
Not committing sacrifices and bloody tribute,
And not slaughtering Atheists,
And not joining in war with Chaos,
But I disagree,
Faith is clearly for those with ignorant minds, empty hearts, false intentions and lies,
For these ‘some’ that ‘some’ described are this.
That is enough wood
And should last for several days,
Darkness is catching up to us,
And we should hurry out of the forest,
Lest a wild beast find us and make us its dinner
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Six.
Sages (Maxed in all Ways)
Friend darkness has come,
The cold has crept upon us,
Let us hurry out of this forsaken forest,
And huddle together,
While I tell the next tale
You have in your travels,
Met a magician?
Wielders of the arcane arts,
Beholders of supernatural power,
Some born with talent for these arts,
And some without,
There exist a number of magic ways,
And most magicians study one,
For all they could hope for,
Is to master but one alone,
Yet there exist the special few,
They have mastered all the ways of magic,
They are the Sage’s friend!
They spent many years researching tomes,
And ancient books,
In vast libraries and collections,
Learning and developing their mind,
They spent many years practicing the movements,
And training themselves in disciplines,
Growing their own mana pool by training,
They spent many years searching for glyphs,
These glyphs of power,
That would unlock spells through research,
The exhausting searching and finding,
This is what these Sages are!
For how else could they have mastered all Ways of Magic?
Some have said that these Sages did not spend many years researching,
That with the click of a mouse they found their intelligence,
Yet even to this today I think this is gibberish!
Some have said that the Sages did not spend many years practicing,
That their knowledge of magic came through easy routine,
And not exhausting practice,
This is what these Sages are!
For how else could they have mastered all Ways of Magic?
Some have said that the Sages did not spend many years searching for Glyphs
Or finding spells,
That their glyphs were bought in stock from a merchant,
And that their spells also come from the click of a mouse,
This is what these Sages are!
For how else could they have mastered all Ways of Magic?
I have found the critique of these Sages insulting,
That somehow they did not spend their whole lives absorbed in the process of it,
How dare they?
Some have said that the Sages merely went into the trepor pit and gathered progression points,
But I am at a loss to what this means!
Some have said that the Sages merely gathered tria from killing gobbles and selling sed’s to miners,
But I am at a loss to what this means!
Some have said that the Sages wearing Battle Helms and Heavy Armor is probably the most ridiculous thing ever,
But I am at a loss to what this means!
Clearly the Sages are knowledgeable, hard working, and wise magicians whose whole lives were spent to the task of mastering all ways of magic,
Clearly it is entirely possible for a real person to master all the ways of magic within several months by standing in one place,
Friend we have met the treeline,
Look behind us!
Arangma begin to stalk us!
They creep from the treetops!
Flee! Flee! Flee!
Hurry into the fields
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Seven.
The Whisper's Followers (Black Flame followers)
Friend we have left that hellish forest,
And come upon this grassy field,
And while we cross it I’ll carry part of your burden,
And tell you a tale
In this world friend there exist evil beings,
Bent on spreading chaos,
And committed to vice,
They do not befit our good places,
They are the antithesis of the natural order,
The enemies of the gods; Talad, Laanx, Xiosia and Dakkru,
The forsaken of society and civilization,
The mentally insane, the serial killers, the fallen and the lost,
They are sworn to secrecy,
They hide behind cloaks and shadows,
They are adept in combat,
They are spreaders of dissension among the masses,
They are bound by true death to their calling of whispers,
Some have said that certain followers have become obvious,
Calling themselves the whisper’s minions in public,
And claiming their following to the anti-faith,
Because somehow these followers heard of the whisper and publicly spoke of it without being left dead in the street, somehow it’s possible for a person to openly talk about the whisper without reaping the consequences,
But I disagree, for clearly the whisper isn’t strong enough to kill off the fools who don’t understand what they deal with, such as a child dwarf who screams of the whisper in the middle of a city, clearly that is entirely possible,
Some have said that certain followers are idiots in cloaks,
Donning midnight blue flowing cloaks that cover themselves ENTIRELY,
So they are completely unrecognizable and unseen,
Because somehow a person can wear a cloak and be utterly unnoticeable and unrecognizable, somehow a person can hide in shadows and camera zoom over walls and fences to see their targets, somehow a person can hear through thick walls and tavern floors.
But yet, I think that it’s entirely possible for someone TO LITERALLY BE UNSEEN AND UNRECOGNIZABLE IN A FLOWING CAPE, And what does it mean to camera zoom? I do not understand, and clearly ANYONE CAN HEAR THROUGH WALLS AND FLOORS,
Some have said that certain followers rely on their roleplay fighting and have nothing to back them up,
Because somehow a person CAN CREATE A CHARACTER AND TWO WEEKS LATER DEFEAT ANYONE AS A FOLLOWER OF THE WHISPER, because clearly stats and skills have no measure in a persons fighting ability, somehow A GUY WHO JUST SITS IN TAVERNS AND WATCHES PEOPLE WITH 34 MELEE CAN BEAT ANYONE, clearly this is so,
Some have said that certain followers have just roleplayed within their own lame circles, creating alts and recycling the same old stuff,
Because somehow as a follower of the whisper a person doesn’t SPREAD DISSENSION, LIES AND DECEIT AS IT’S ----MEANT TO BE---, because somehow as a follower of the whisper a person can just recycle alts and play with the same people over and over again, still achieving the whispers desires, clearly this is so,
Bah! What lies and nonsense, what is an alt? what circles? clearly you can be a follower of the whisper by wandering around Hydlaa and making alts and playing around with your friends, la-te-da-te-da, clearly this is so,
Some have said that certain followers are unable to realize how being a follower of the whisper means THEY ARE SLAVES, PAWNS, MINIONS AND BOUND TO IT UNTIL DEATH, AS IN, YOU –CANT- LEAVE, -EVER-, AS IN, YOU CANT BE A PRETTY LITTLE NOLTHRIR GIGGLING AROUND
Because somehow a person can follow the whisper on a whim, and do the quests in the sewer and prance around the tunnels and alleyways having fun, because somehow you can be a follower of the whisper for some time then leave and become a defender of Yliakum! clearly this is so,
Once more, I detest these accusations! Clearly a person can become a follower of the whisper as a funny joke, and leave later on for the kicks and giggles,
Truly,
It’s not as if this hypothetical temple is open to people who godmod cloaks, shadows, spying, saboteur, assassination, and roleplay fighting,
Or
Stay in annoying roleplay cliques,
Or
Pretend to be strong when they are a two week old character with nothing to show for the big talk
Clearly,
I find all these nitpicking, baseless words and criticisms unfounded! They are lies!
It appears we’ve crossed the field my friend,
And look we have forgotten how exhausted we are,
We’ll go into my humble home and drink a tea,
And perhaps discuss the current politics
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Who is next? :detective:
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Eight.
Miners
How is your tea?
Well the water’s fresh
But the herbs are days old
It seems I’m running low
And may journey to the market
Still - While we finish our brew
I’ll mention of places
Called the mines
In mineral deposits around the land
There exists what you would call mines
Resources of value are drawn from the source
And sold by the miners for cost
Rewards depend on their skill
An expert miner knows where the ores hide
Where to strike and swing
And which locations are best suited to the task
They are burdened by temperature;
Summer's simmering heat
And winter's chilling cold
Affect the body, supposedly
The work is exhausting:
Tiring any strongman
Intensive: collapsing the weary
Rest is a necessity
Labor drains the body
They need constant nourishment
Many have said that miners don’t need skill to gather minerals:
A Kran fresh off character creation can amass hundreds of platinum ore overnight to pay for his main character's training.
Many have spoken of miner's resistance to the weather, to the temperature:
For one can garb in full Heavy Armor, a Battle Helmet - while carrying heavy loads of ore, and not faint. One man said to me, "Bro hw ellse can I get my hvy armr///mgic ways up??!?!!" True and truer, my grammatically-retarded friend - how else, how else?
Many have said: most miners ignore the realistic need for rest. As a miner, one can commit many hours of backbreaking labor without the necessity for rest.
Others say: 'why is it miners forget to replenish themselves with food and drink - it is a requirement to live, no less. Why?' They cannot see that a miner posses the innate ability to mine without needing food or drink. No doubt, a gift from the Gods.
Clearly, anyone, with delusional eyes, could see these miners of whom I speak act in a completey logical and in-character manner. For, obviously, they can ignore facts and not roleplay their vocation - because clearly, that's f**** st**id.
Finished already, eh?
Time to restock the fire
And go to bed
Tommorow we'll head to the town
And I'll show you the fine market there
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Choices for the next satire.
A) The Stonehead.
B) People who complain that the good times have gone forever.
C) Talad worshipers.
D) Another PLer guild.
Send me a PM with your vote my devoted readers!
:detective:
ADDED: The votes are in!
The majority of voters chose A) The Stonehead! :sorcerer:
See below!
Good reading kids.
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Do the rockbrain.
I don't do PMS.
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Nine.
The Stonehead (The Stonehead)
Morning friend
Another welcome day
Given to us by our gods
Be grateful
As each day is a blessing
And while you eat
I’ll tell you a tale
Of a tavern
In Gugrontid there exists a place
Called the Stonehead
Carved from rock
And pitted within the fortress
It is the largest business in the city
Well kept by its staff
With fine food and finer drink
It captures a comfortable setting
It should maintain a healthy economy
And a realistic venture at that
Serving food at cost to pay for inventory and workers
And extra tria for the owner
The Stonehead is a stable and sound business!
Centered on fair and economic pricing!
Some have said that the Stonehead is not a business but an oversized bleeding heart
Soaking up nonexistent funds and handing them out to the masses
That it is the largest soup kitchen in the land
That it is unrealistic for the largest business in a city to have no income,
The Stonehead is a stable and sound business!
Centered on fair and economic pricing!
Some have said that the Stonehead is part of a failing economy
That it is ridiculous to believe a benefactor would pay for the tavern
That somehow a Vigesimi would pay from their pocket to support the business
Because somehow, in a place where large amounts of soldiers, miners, wanderers and citizen patrons eat and drink, it is entirely R-E-A-L-I-S-T-I-C for a VIGESIMI to pay for the MASSIVE costs: gaining no income whatsoever
The Stonehead is a stable and sound business!
Centered on fair and economic pricing!
What? You agree with these critics? You say that this so-called business venture sounds like a sham? You say it sounds unrealistic that a business gathering no income could be so large, well kept by a happy staff, high quality food and drink, and actually have a modest atmosphere?
Fool, stop using your mind!
What? You say this Vigesimi has to be the biggest sucker around? You say as a Vigesimi you’d think he would know business and if he were as kind-hearted as he is portrayed, but true to his vocation, that he would have a business with prices that gathered income but did not duty the customers heavily? You say it would be far more realistic if the Vigesimi was using the Stonehead as a cover for underhanded dealings?
Don’t make me laugh!
Finished so quickly?
You must be excited to see the town,
It lies not far from my home,
Along the road west of the fork,
Pick up those leather satchels in the corner,
And follow me
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EDIT: didn't notice later poems. neverrmind :sweatdrop:
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Choices for the next satire.
A) RP Cliques.
B) People who plan every roleplay they do.
C) Talad worshippers.
D) People who recycle alts for all their roleplays.
Send me a PM with your votes my devoted readers!
:detective:
ADDED: The votes are in!
B) People who plan every roleplay they do.
:woot: Stay tuned! This is going to be scathing!
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Ten.
The Acting Troop (Roleplay scripters)
The sun’s out
The road we walk on is paved
And a breeze refreshes us
I’ll tell you; it’s a gorgeous day
I’ll stop my prattling and tell a tale
Have you ever heard of the 'Acting Troop'?
In Hydlaa there are a group of performers
Called the Acting Troop
They present plays and scenes
And assume the role of a character
They are experts at improvisational skills
Able to react to any circumstance
Quick to respond with apt action
And accepting if a plan goes awry
They are masters of plot twists
Of turns in the tales,
These catch the audience unawares
And enrich the storyline
Unfortunately, I am nearly alone in my appraisals!
Others have stated that these actors are terrible at improvisation
Believing these performers are lackluster at facing unknown variables
That without their script they are a poor show
And are below street entertainers in this respect
Friend, you say that if a roleplay is without improvisation, -IT IS NOT ROLEPLAYING AT ALL?- THAT IT IS JUST A WRITTEN STORY, AND -NOT- ROLEPLAY?!
Others have stated that these actors do not follow plot twists
That in fact, these plot twists are lies
Because how could it be a good roleplaying plot twist when it has been planned and rehearsed?
Friend you say that plot twists should surprise everyone involved? And what in Talad’s name are roleplays?
Evidently these actors are far underrated
Simply because they plan out all their scenes
That does not make the plays pointless
Does it?
Honestly, it cannot be that in these situations where anything can go one way or another that a character is truly developed.
It is not as if a planned roleplay stymies a characters growth.
What? You say planning all the roleplays is Ulbernaut excrement? You say it's a trepor turd in every real roleplayer's face?
That is all I have to say of them: For they tell a good story friend.
What? You say it doesn't matter if it's a good story or not? You say they should take that crap elsewhere?
You say a roleplayer assumes the role of a character; and develops that characters identity, through any situation, without fully strategizing it OOCly?
Haha! This argument is going nowhere, for your reasoning has no place in this aspect of Yliakum life.
My tale did not siphon off enough time
And we have a ways to go
Shoulder your pack
And we'll quicken our pace
For our safety
As I have heard bandits roam these days
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I have been given requests for topics to satirize, so if you have one send it in.
The satires will resume soon.
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Eleven.
Godmodding, I never knew
My new friend
Have I yet to tell you
of an odd encounter
chanced in Kada-El's tavern
of Hydlaa?
No?
Well,
it went like this...
That day, I happened to pass the Smithy of Harnquist. There, I noticed a cloaked figure, reading the message board. Walking through, I journeyed to the Kada-el's Tavern; to quench my thirst. There, inside of the tavern common room, sipping a beer, aside the bartender, the cloaked figure entered from behind my back, and proffered his hand for a shake.
Laughing, I told him to take his hand and shove it in the bed sheets he was wearing. Successively, he threw a poster of, presumably, me, though I must say it was not fitting in its description of my sumptuous attire nor my sexy attributes, at me. Later I learned it was offering bounty for my head - and had been posted to the Hydlaa Message Board.
Then, in the same set of motion, he began to cast a spell of Dark Way. Now, I remind you, this is inside of Kada-el's, where Allelia serves drinks. This is also next to a Guard Tower - and a High Officer in the Hydlaa Guard, Jefecra.
I then stepped into OOC mode and reminded him I do not fight inside of the cities, especially not Kada-el's. Following this statement, the cloaked figure told me the wanted poster was sanctioned. I responded: no player-made wanted poster was sanctioned, and any fighting within the city is also illegal. The person then named me a godmodder and left.
Truly, you, cloaked figure, had revealed me the truth. To fight inside of the largest establishment of business in a city, next to towers and guards, is certainly not foolish or out-of-character fighting. In actuality, to not fight inside of Kada-el's would be godmodding. Thankyou, thankyou, thankyou.
And that is the tale
Short though it may be
It tells of a delusional dolt
and a sexy mocker
(You have to check the conversation pertaining to this. It is hilarious. ;D )
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Self confessed, I the 'cloaked figure'. Notable Irony stems from character inconsistency. "Kull" A law disregarding character relying on the 'law' in selfish selection of his predicament. "Godmoddish" as I'll define it.
The law in relation to citizen arrest is an uncodified doctrine within the substantive law of the Octarchy. In light of the circumstance a tussle would alert the guards much towards my favour to effect the arrest. Arguably on a balance, conducts are justified to a reasonable man. But hey, illegality hasn't stopped you from doing anything illegal hasn't it? Robbery and murder? It's never about the Law, just you, Kull Rhundin the Selfish.
Kull's inconsistent RP worries me. He however has the selective rights which i don't deny, though I'm confident none of us here would be quite keen on RPing with a player with such selfish selectivity. Getting Robbed with no future prospect of equitable remedies? Hardly sounds appealing.
Don't RP a baddie if you can't take the heat. Cry more. ;)
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I don't fight anywhere in the cities except for sewers, the Laanx dungeon, the Arena and on special occasions an alleyway or the secluded halls of the temple. Otherwise because NPC guards cant apprehend or attend to fights, and because GM guards are barely around, fighting in any place with guards at duty is foolish and I just don't do it. It also includes being branded with not knowing the RP rules. Being able to take the heat isn't the issue, you can find me and fight me anywhere except the cities. That's about it. Selfish? No. I don't antagonize or harass inside the city to my selfish advantage. I also didn't have Kull use the law to defend himself, at the moment you wanted to fight in the tavern I went 'OOC' and said no, it was no longer 'IC' for me.
You can ask me if we can fight outside the city and that's cool with me. Sure it's annoying to have someone say no when you want to attack them, but I explained myself and that's it.
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Essentially, it's your reasoning so don't bring "the law" into the context.
Effectively your reply made the whole rant laughably contradicting.
"I also didn't have Kull use the law to defend himself, at the moment you wanted to fight in the tavern I went 'OOC' and said no, it was no longer 'IC' for me."
You cited IC reasons however.
"I said any player made wanted poster was not sanctioned and any fighting within the city was illegal. He then called me a godmodder and left."
I'm lacking any confidence in future dealings with you. So would it be for other players.
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Essentially, it's your reasoning so don't bring "the law" into the context.
Fact is, the law can't even be enforced by the lawmakers currently in the game, so as players we use reasoning to work around this.
Effectively your reply made the whole rant laughably contradicting.
No.
I'm lacking any confidence in future dealings with you. So would it be for other players.
I honestly don't care if one person likes me and doesn't want to roleplay with me. Because the game is the way it is, with mechanics so limited and opinions on it so diverse, every time people roleplay together there are and always will be arguments about what is right and what is not. I told you I don't fight in the cities (except under the special circumstances) and that's it.
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Siding with Vilthis here.
'Nuff said.
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Now, I'm not one to take sides, but Akaiddo and V-something-or-other are wrong.
But to show my lack of bias in this argument I will say that bloodedIrishman is a giant poopface.
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Two punks in the same forum. H-oly sh*t, didn`t see that as a possib ility. Vilthis, I call that reasoning that would be a impossible situation, and then realizing its not. Akaiddo, note that you bitch on every topic. Perriwinkle, your still `mah hero.
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Akaiddo, note that you bitch on every topic.
Name calling on a basis of people for agreeing with you? You don't have to advertise your degree of immaturity, your forum signature does more than enough to exemplify that. Everyone has a right to disagree, it's something we an agree on at some level of understanding.
Vilthis, I call that reasoning that would be a impossible situation, and then realizing its not.
Reasoning that it was an impossible situation and realising it was not implies you're wrong. You know it when you taste futility in your lips. Fundamentally, the point commonly agreed by people is - Stop being so obnoxious or "poop face" in Overtherainbow's analogy.
Above all, this statement was most disheartening to hear.
I honestly don't care if one person likes me and doesn't want to roleplay with me.
Because the point of this response was never to aggravate OOC relations. And prominent "Evil" Roleplayers (Rigwyn and his exposition) always has urged a strong emphasis on a friendly OOC relations.
Where did this version of bloodedIrishman went who emphasises the community effort to improve our play here? I'm struggling to come to grips with the angry, rude and hypocritical person whom i formerly admired for this post.
http://www.hydlaaplaza.com/smf/index.php?topic=36558.0
I'm ashamed it has come to this and I apologise. I know there is little else I could remedy but await for a change of heart.
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Oh my god.
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Super cool story, bro.
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This is a cornerstone of my Planeshift legacy. Awwwwww yeaaaaah.