PlaneShift
Gameplay => General Discussion => Topic started by: Zeraph on May 27, 2004, 01:32:37 pm
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When is one of the only times Enkidukai jump into the water?
When there fur is on fire!
- Ok, pretty lame, but let?s see if you can make up a better PS related Joke?
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Originally posted by Zeraph
When is one of the only times Enkidukai jump into the water?
When there fur is on fire!
That reminds me of that joke \"When are you allowed to spit at a Turkish woman?\" \"When her mustache is on fire\". The difference is that that one was actually half-funny, since it was implying that Turkish woman have mustaches. Implying that Enkidukais have fur is not even nearly funny, since they do have fur.
p.s. TYPO ALERT!!! \"their fur\", not \"there fur\"
*edit*
And no I don\'t know any PS Jokes, so don\'t ask.
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Ok brace yourselves for lameness...
What is worse than a Nolthrir Elf without water?
A Xacha without a book.
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Originally posted by karakth
Ok brace yourselves for lameness...
What is worse than a Nolthrir Elf without water?
A Xacha without a book.
wow funny
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I think someone should make a chain of jokes started from:
why did Faldrok cross the road?
No, seriously - I\'d like to see that ;)
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Originally posted by Skizzik
Originally posted by Zeraph
When is one of the only times Enkidukai jump into the water?
When there fur is on fire!
That reminds me of that joke \"When are you allowed to spit at a Turkish woman?\" \"When her mustache is on fire\". The difference is that that one was actually half-funny, since it was implying that Turkish woman have mustaches. Implying that Enkidukais have fur is not even nearly funny, since they do have fur.
p.s. TYPO ALERT!!! \"their fur\", not \"there fur\"
*edit*
And no I don\'t know any PS Jokes, so don\'t ask.
Your a nasty piece of work arent you?
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What is the difference between a Kran and a dwarf?
A Kran
Ok this one is taken from a reallife joke
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omg the lameness, please stop before someone gets hurt :P
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Originally posted by elscouta
What is the difference between a Kran and a dwarf?
A dwarf says, \"I mine rocks.\"
While a Kran says, \"Rocks are mine.\"
:( Yeah...
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Yeah, my nose is already bleeding...
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I think it was a good idea. I say proceed.
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Okay, it\'s time to save this thread before things get really bad...
\"Why didn\'t the Kran cross the road?
He\'s still trying to figure the shortest way across!\"
:D
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MEDIC!
Nah that was kinda decent. Not sure how the Kran roleplayers will feel about the implication that theyre stupid lol.
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Based on real jokes I\'ve heard - I\'m not that original :P
A large Enkidukai walks into a bar. He goes up to the bartender and says \"I?ll have a large mug.................................................. of ale please\"
The Bartender replies \"Yeah sure, but what\'s with the big pause?\"
Pause?.paws?you see?ah forget it :P
Two Kran walk into the bar......... :rolleyes: You\'d think one of them would\'ve seen it!
Apologies to you all
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Originally posted by Kada-El
Two Kran walk into the bar......... :rolleyes: You\'d think one of them would\'ve seen it!
ROFL :D
Originally posted by Cirque
Nah that was kinda decent. Not sure how the Kran roleplayers will feel about the implication that theyre stupid lol.
I don\'t mind jokes about Krans being stupid (and they\'re not, it\'s a misinterpretation of their page X( ), as long as the joke is good.
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;) sorry to prolong the grossly unfair racial stereotype but?.
Why did the Kran climb on to the tavern roof?
Because he heard drinks were on the house.
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Unfair racial stereotyping adds an aspect of \"realism\" to the game :evil:
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Kada owns this thread...:) but thats just cuz RedMonk just found it.
Why is it that some fenkis cant become good rogues?
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they are always spotted :D
OMG...thats hilarious
*EHRUM*
Why do dwarves afford having treasurys?
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they always find low prices
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Originally posted by TheRedMonk
Why do dwarves afford having treasurys?
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they always find low prices
This joke is not funny, i liked the jokes about krans more.
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Why did the Dwarf Buy the smaller size?
The poor Dwarf was a little Short (by 2 tria)
Ok, this was a little low, but come on?
Sorry I wasn?t around, only one computer on the internet in the house :( :rolleyes:
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Once there was a huge Kran, who everyone feared. The Kran weilded two large swords, and had a fierce reputation all across Hydlaa.
But one day, a small dwarf went up to the Kran and began making fun of the Kran\'s intelligence, which to be fair was slightly lower than average. The Kran took no notice of him, thinking it best that he ignored the small annoying dwarf.
This went on for several days, until finally the Kran could take it no more. \"That\'s it!!!\" he shouted, \"I\'m going to squish you to the seventh level!!!\"
\"Sorry man,\" the Dwarf was quick to reply, \"...Fighting won\'t be implemented until Crystal Blue.\"
And the dwarf was safe forever :)
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What\'s more dangerous than an Enkidukai running with an open flame?
A Kran at an alchemist bench.
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Heh thats not bad.
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Whats more difficult than determining Laanx\'s gender?
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Getting drunk enough to make her look hot again.
(dont hit me talad!) o.o
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I think that Karakth?s joke is best funniest one! LoL! Lets see:
* Thinks of a joke * ??? 20 mins later ??. * Still thinking of a joke * ......................... :D
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Hydlaa Post - May 28, 2004
Hydlaa, Yliakum (Reuters) -- A tragic fire has destroyed the personal library of of one large blue Kran.
Both of his books have been lost.
The Kran is reportedly devastated - apparently, he had not finished colouring the second one.
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A Kran went to see a healer to get the results of his brain checkup. The doctor said: \"Mr. Kran, I have some bad news for you. First, we have discovered that your brain has two sides: the left side and the right side.\"
The Kran interrupted, \"Well, that\'s normal, isn\'t it? I thought everybody had two sides to their brain?\"
The healer replied, \"That\'s true, Mr. Kran. But your brain is very unusual because on the left side there isn\'t anything right, while on the right side there isn\'t anything left.\"
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Originally posted by Levski
Hydlaa Post - May 28, 2004
Hydlaa, Yliakum (Reuters) -- A tragic fire has destroyed the personal library of of one large blue Kran.
Both of his books have been lost.
The Kran is reportedly devastated - apparently, he had not finished colouring the second one.
ROFL!! This joke is teh winz!!! :D
And Kada, I almost posted a joke like the Kran + Bar one, but I couldn\'t make it sound funny enough... :P
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Good jokes Levski! :D
A ventriloquist (a person who holds a puppet and gives it a voice) was having a show and he was telling Kran joke after Kran joke, all the time reminding his audience about how stupid Krans are.
So finally a Kran stood up in the audience and shouted
\"HEY! who do you think you are to come here and judge me? Krans are not as stupid!\"
So the artist responded \"Relax friend. These are just jokes, nothing serious\"
The the Kran said \"Shut up! Im not talking to you! Im talking to that small guy sitting on your knees\"
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Harhar... bad times for Krans... :D
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How can you upset a Kran ?
Put him in a circular room and tell him there is a crystal in a corner.
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Sorry, that\'s all I had...
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Originally posted by Yann
How can you upset a Kran ?
Put him in a circular room and tell him there is a crystal in a corner.
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Sorry, that\'s all I had...
hahah, I Like it, it might be a lameass thread, but there are some good jokes :D And some really really bad ones :P
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Heh, the first few jokes, made my eyes want to bleed (after a meaningful talk, they decided to be nice to me).. then they improved, the first one to earn a smile being karakth, then levski stole the show. I\'d heard that one before RedMonk, but about a blonde, if I can think of anything witty enough, I\'ll add my 2 cents worth..
I\'m not very well versed in planeshift lore.
OT: anyone here play PristonTale, I\'m just trying to get some of that cool armor with a cape, 10 levels to go.. 22 ugh. I needed some combat, crystals annoy me after extended periods.
kudos to the jokesters.
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A Kran walks into a Bar,
The bartender says, ?Ware do you get your hair cut??
The Kran replies, ?At Gray-Clips?
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Originally posted by Zeraph
A Kran walks into a Bar,
The bartender says, ?Ware do you get your hair cut??
The Kran replies, ?At Gray-Clips?
And were back to page one :P
hehe all these kran jokes remind me alot of blonde jokes.
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What do you call an Xacha that falls for a Kran\'s trick?
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Stupid! :D
Pardon that...
*locks his jokes back up in their cage*
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an enki walks into a bar and sits next to a klyros
the klyros constantly pokes the enki and says \"zap\"
the enki then says \"you do that one more time and i will give you the worst beating in your life\"
the klyros stares at him for a moment then pokes him again and says \"zap\"
the enki then swings his club and hits the klyros between the legs
the klyros then says \"theres nothing there\"
the enki is puzzled and askes \"then how do you reproduce?\"
the klyros then stares at him for a few moments then pokes him and says \"zap\"
(klyros was the only thing i could think of for an alien sorry :P)
a ylian walks into a bar and sees a kran fishing around for something in his cup
the ylian goes over to him and askes \"what are you doing?\"
the kran replies \"the bartender said there is something in the water that seems to make krans stupid\"
omg i am lame :P
EDIT: ooh i got another one!
why did laanx go see michael jackson?
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because there are no mirrors in yliakum
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What\'s the difference between a wagon full of dead ylians and a wagon full of dead krans?
You can\'t unload the wagon full of dead krans with a pitchfork.
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What do you do when a kran throws a pin at you?
Run away! Its got a grenade in its mouth!
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Whats the easiest race to beat in arm wrestling?
Dwarves; because during the match, their booster seat tends to slide off the stack of phone books.
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Ah! Thank you for the praise!
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A Kran went with his Ylian friend to see a litter of pterosaurs.
On returning home, the Kran breathlessly informed his mother that there were two boy pterosaurs and two girl pterosaurs.
\"How did you know?\" his mother asked.
\"My friend picked them up and looked underneath,\" he replied.
\"I think it\'s printed on the bottom.\"
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HAHAHAHA!!!! Olig\'s and Levski\'s jokes were really funny. Most of the others I have heard with blonds, or any other stereotypical person/place/thing out there.
And Drak, I told you the answer to that through IRC. =.= Although, the most obvious answer for people in their right mind would be to get to the sugar refinery. Duh! I am an addict. =.=
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Whats the proudest moment of a young kran\'s life? Saying the word spelled in their alphabet soup. Whats the sad part? No one has the heart to tell them its really spagettios.
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Originally posted by Syzerian
an enki walks into a bar and sits next to a klyros
the klyros constantly pokes the enki and says \"zap\"
the enki then says \"you do that one more time and i will give you the worst beating in your life\"
the klyros stares at him for a moment then pokes him again and says \"zap\"
the enki then swings his club and hits the klyros between the legs
the klyros then says \"theres nothing there\"
the enki is puzzled and askes \"then how do you reproduce?\"
the klyros then stares at him for a few moments then pokes him and says \"zap\"
Lol! Looks like someone\'s still in his sex, pee and pooh phase. ;)
Originally posted by Cirque
Your a nasty piece of work arent you?
Where do you think Zeraph got that joke from? And seeing from this thread I\'m not the only one who didn\'t think that the burning enkidukai joke was funny.
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A Ylians walks into a tavern and sees a Xacha leaning against the wall. He walks up to the Xacha and says, \"Greetings. Would you care to hear a jest about a Kran?\" the Xacha replies, \"Are you sure you want to do that? The barkeep is a Kran, there are two Krans sitting at the bar, a troupe of three Kran bards, and couple of Krans sitting at a table... it might not be a wise move on your part.\" The Ylians pauses for a moment and answers \"I guess you\'re right... I wouldn\'t want to have to explain the joke eight times.\"
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My jokes are lame because I only spent 20 seconds tops on them?
Ok, I modified this joke from one I knew:
A Kran & an Elf were practicing Archery in the woods.
The Kran accidentally shoots the Elf in the foot with an arrow.
The Elf is knocked unconscious from hitting his head on a rock.
The Kran shouts, ?I think I killed my friend! What do I do??
Someone replies, ?First you have to make sure he is dead.?
*THUD*
?Ok, did that, what?s next??
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LOL these last 2 were good ! :D
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A Kran is sitting in a field, trying to row a boat through the corn. After a while, another Kran comes by in his cart. He stops and gets down on the road, looking at the obviously confused thing in the boat. \"What\'re you doing out there?\" the Kran with the cart asks. The Kran in the boat simply replies \"I\'m rowing my boat.\" The other Kran just shakes his head and gets up in his cart. \"You know, it\'s Kran\'s like you who give the rest of us a bad reputation,\" and he starts driving away, shouting back at the Kran in the boat, \"And if I could swim, I would have come out there and beat you up for it!\"
Bad... :) But it was worth a try.
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Whats the easiest race to beat in arm wrestling?
Dwarves; because during the match, their booster seat tends to slide off the stack of phone books.
lol
i laughed so hard when i heard this!
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rofl, the jokes are getting slightly less lamer as people start noticing the thread :P
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nah, just old blonde jokes rip-offs. :(
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imo, they\'re getting better, even though they\'re ripoffs :P
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Originally posted by lynx_lupo
nah, just old blonde jokes rip-offs. :(
Some were not, especially the arm-wrestling one. :D
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During the fabled meeting between Galeran and Laanx, Laanx told Galeran that he would answer any questions he may have.
Galeran thought for a while and finally asked, \"To you great Laanx what is a million years?\"
To which Laanx replied, \"To me a million years is but a second.\"
This brought another question to Galeran\'s mind. He asked, \"To you great Laanx what is a million circles?\"
To which Laanx replied, \"To me a million circles is but a single tria.\"
Galeran amazed by this thought finally asked, \"Oh great Laanx could I bother you for a tria?\"
\"In a second.\" was the deity?s reply.
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how do u stop a dwarf from drowning?
take your foot off it\'s head.
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How does a dwarf wipe it\'s arse?
Answer: He runs in the grass.
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Originally posted by Yann
How does a dwarf wipe it\'s arse?
Answer: He runs in the grass.
Hehe :D Great :)
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How do dwarfs fight dirty?
By punching up onto your shins!
Why did the klyros cross the road?
It was a couch potato and had gained some pounds.
How do krans fight dirty?
In a mud puddle.
How do you beat a ynnwn in a fight?
Give it a sword!
How do you make a enkidukai forfeit a chess match?
Give them a water bed as a prize!
How does a dermorian fight dirty?
Flip the light switch.
How does a lemur fight dirty and win?
How can a lemur NOT fight dirty and win?
What happens if you drop a coin in a crowd of ynnwn?
You start a global disaster warning.
Who\'s the richest and dumbest ynnwn?
The one who picked up the coin.
What would happen if a kran and a klyros had a baby?
Eww! That\'s kros!
How do you drown an undrowning kran?
Show it a tasty piece of rock candy.
How do you get a diaboli into a church?
Tell them there is a large social banquet taking place.
How do you keep your klyros happy?
Shake some food into their tank.
Ok, that\'s enough lame made-up jokes for now. Cheerio.
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Planeshift races banned from water park! Read all about it!
Its true! Managers at a local water park have prohibited most Planeshift races from even stepping past the entrance. Although the park\'s populas was mainly of Ylians, less common races have been banned for constant complaints and casualties in the area. \"We\'ve had enough!\" cries Redwolf, a water park employee, \"I am sick of cleaning all the Klyros crap from the pools!\"
Apart from the klyros making themselves \"at home\" around the pools, Lemurs and Xachas have also been banned for bringing several lawsuits against the park. Apparently, there was not enough suntan lotion for them, resulting in serious injuries and dark skin. \"It was costing us thousands!\" claims Burt the owner, \"Those people should stay out of the sun!\"
Oddly enough, Dermorians and Nolthrirs are also banned from the park. Their pointy ears scared off customers as they were easily mistakened for sharks skimming the water.
Sadly, Krans have also been banned despite their plees to continue their favorite activity; innertubing. \"We just had too many Krans clogging up the water slides and scratching open the sides\" says lifeguard Pizzaface, \"But no one can forget the Crugtor case.\" The Crugtor case, of course, was the accident of one particular Kran whom dissolved in the heavy chlorine after hours of trying to smell the scratch-n-sniff sticker at the bottom of the pool.
\"We want to create a kid-safe environment,\" says Burt, \"which is why the Diabolis are gone too.\" Diabolis are extreme socialists and party goers. Many of them have already been kicked out for smuggling booze and herbs into the park. They are also banned for insisting on playing thier favorite pool game; \"Bobbing for Diabolis\".
\"The dwarves were the worst of them all!\" claims Redwolf. Other employees, including Burt, all agreed on the dwarf problem. \"It was just too disgusting to handle anymore. We had to let them go,\" say Burt, \"We\'ve spent hours trying to clean out all the hair that clogged the filters in our kiddy pools! Nothing we\'ve tried has gotten rid of the mess!\" \"I admit, we will miss tossing them into the pools,\" says Pizzaface, \"but its a sacrifice we at the water park are willing to make.\"
The water park is now an exclusive attraction to Ylians and Ynnwns only. Many officials agree that the park has never been better. Enkidukais are surprisingly still allowed into the park, but thats only because they\'d rather stay away from the water and go to Nipper\'s Shoelace Heaven and Fishbar, located just down the street.
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A PS player to a game developer:
\"When will CB be released?\"
The Developer: \"Within 6 months\".
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Originally posted by Toadhead
A PS player to a game developer:
\"When will CB be released?\"
The Developer: \"Within 6 months\".
Lol best joke ever!
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(http://us.mms.com/us/news/images/m_dot.gif) Why did the Kran get fired from his job @ the M&Ms Factory?
He kept removing the ones with the ?w? s on them?.
:diamond: Ok, well just trying to keep this going?
Here is one I found & modified:
There once was a Kran scientist who studied frogs.
One day, the Kran put the frog on the ground and told it to jump. The frog jumped four feet.
So the Kran wrote in his notebook, \"frog with four feet, jumps four feet.\"
So the Kran cut off one of one of the frogs legs. The Kran told the frog to jump.
Frog jumped three feet.
So the Kran wrote in his note book, \"frog with three feet, jumps three feet.\"
So the Kran cut of another leg. He told the frog to jump. The frog jumped two feet.
So the Kran wrote in his notebook \"frog with two feet, jumps two feet.\"
The Kran cut off one more leg. He told the frog to jump. Frog jumped one foot.
So the Kran wrote in his notebook, \"frog with one foot, jumps one foot.\"
So the Kran cut off his last leg. \"He said, \"Frog jump. Frog jump. FROG JUMP!\"
So the Kran wrote in his notebook, \"Frog with no feet, goes deaf.\"
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ROTF!!!!!! some of these jokes are realy good. i feel sorry for the krans.
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2 krylos are learning a book called the Bible (a fairy tale) there names are Mary and Willam
Mary can\'t stand Sunday school, but her brother William doesn\'t have a problem with it. So one day in Sunday school, Mary thinks, \"The hell with it,\" and decides to go to sleep. The teacher sees this and asks Mary a question to keep her awake.
\"Mary, who created the heavens and the earth in this fairy tale?\"
William, who is sitting behind Mary, pokes her in the butt with his pencil. Mary wakes up and shouts, \"God almighty!\"
And the teacher says, \"Yes. That\'s correct, Mary.\"
Mary goes back to sleep and the teacher asks her another question.
\"Who died on the cross for our sins again acording to the fairy tale?\"
William pokes Mary again. She wakes up and shouts, \"Jesus Christ!\"
Once again, she goes back to sleep. This time the teacher asks, \"Mary, what was the first thing Eve said to Adam when they had there third son?\"
William pokes her again. Mary wakes up and shouts, \"If you don\'t stop poking me with that thing, I\'m gonna break it off!\"
(OK its adaped from a real joke but it still works :P
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A Kran named Bob had a near death experience.
The other day he went horseback riding. Everything was going fine until the horse started bouncing out of control. He tried with all his might to hang on, but was thrown off.
Just when things could not possibly get worse, his foot got caught in the stirrup. When this happened, he fell head-first to the ground.His head continued to bounce harder as the horse did not stop or even slow down.
Just as he was giving up hope and losing consciousness, the Wal-Mart manager happened to walk by and unplug it. :D
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U should collect all these jokes and put them in an in game joke book.
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A Xacha is experimenting in his laboratory with one trained spider.
He cut one leg to the spider, and say him:
\"Spider, walk!\" and the spider walk. The Xacha write in his notebook \"The spiders can walk with 7 legs\".
Then, he cut another leg and say him:
\"Spider, walk!\" and the spider walk. The Xacha write in his notebook \"The spiders can walk with 6 legs\".
He do it with all the spider legs, and finally the Xacha cut his last leg. He say, again:
\"Spider, walk!\" but obviously the spider can\'t. The Xacha write in his notebook: \"Big discovery: When the spiders haven\'t got legs, they become deaf!\".
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( Adapted from the \"how many Usenet users does it take to change a lightbulb?\" )
How many PS forum members does it take to change a lightbulb?
1 to change the lightbulb and start a lightbulb changing guild.
7 newbies to join the lightbulb changing guild.
4 to say \"good luck\" to the guild.
12 to flame the guild because it is not planeshift related.
15 to random spam the thread.
6 evil-aligned members to declare war to the the lightbulb changers because they are good-aligned.
14 to discuss whether changing lightbulbs is lawful good or neutral good.
3 Cabalis to say \'We will pwn you\'
25 to correct all the spelling errors in the thread.
12 to flame those who use 1337 speak.
12 to create a adept of neons guild.
26 to take part in a flame war between the lightbulb changers and the adept of neons.
18 to post pictures that show neons are superior to lightbulbs.
4 to start threads about how this lightbulb stuff is stupid and should be deleted.
2 to say this is funny but should be moved to Hydlaa.
18 to spam the new thread.
1 moderator to delete everything.
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Why doesn\'t CVS work when elscouta has used it?
Because he/she/it locked the whole thing
:rolleyes:
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that\'s not funny ... ;(
and i\'m a \"he\"
(Note: Someone knows what could have caused this lock? I know this is *really* the wrong place but as Androgos seems to hunt me even here...)
Edit: yipee :)
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Lock is gone now
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Stumbled on this post as I was browsing through the forums...here are a few of my (lame) jokes:
Q: What is a Kran\'s favourite type of music?
A: Hard Rock!
Q: What is a Diaboli\'s favourite food?
A: Devilled Eggs.
Q: What is the most common name used for female Dwarves?
A: Minnie.
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How do you confuse a kran?
Put them in a room full of shovels and tell them to take their pick.
P.S. Yes i am a kran. This joke is about any kran not in the blitzers.
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Why do all the other races of Hydlaa tell jokes about Krans?
Because they can understand them
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Two dwarves walk out of the pub.....it could happen.
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Two Kran walk into the bar......... You\'d think one of them would\'ve seen it!
Nonononono!!!
It\'s two Kran walk into a bar, you\'d have thought the second one would have noticed, and as for that Skizzik guy, who Cirque called a \"nasty piece of work\" i couldn\'t agree more Cirque, i couldn\'t agree more! :D
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no mines a different joke 2 dwarves walk OUT of a bar .....it could happen the joke is that dwarves a drunks and they dont leave the pub
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At school, a boy is told by a classmate that most adults are hiding at least one dark secret, and that this makes it very easy to blackmail them by saying, ?I know the whole truth? -- even when you don\'t know anything.
The boy decides to go home and try it out. As he is greeted by his mother at the front door he says, ?I know the whole truth.? His mother quickly hands him 40trias and says, ?Just don\'t tell your father.?
Quite pleased, the boy waits for his father to get home from work, and greets him with, ?I know the whole truth.? The father promptly hands him 80trias and says, ?Please don\'t say a word to your mother.?
Very pleased, the boy is on his way to school the next day, when the shadowy figure of the mailman appears at his front door. The boy greets him by saying, ?I know the whole truth.? The mailman drops the mail, opens his arms and says, ?Then come give your FATHER a big hug.?
Ok, & my little sister wanted me to put this one on:
Q: Why didn?t the skeleton cross the road?
A: Because he didn?t have the guts for it?
Btw: thoughs jokes are great lol! I like the light bulb guild one :D
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lol half of these are blonde/irish ripoff jokes but theyre still funny anyhow
keep em coming!
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Ok, one day a bunch of regular Kran fell off a cliff, 20 died.
When they got to the afterlife, they get granted one wish.
First three Kran go by and ask to be made smarter. The Kran at the end breaks out laughing.
The tenth Kran makes his wish to be smarter and the last Kran laughs even harder.
The 19th Kran makes his wish to be smarter, and the last Kran has nearly pissed himself laughing.
Finally, the last Kran steps up, through forced seriousness in his state of hysterics, and says
\"Make \'em all stupid again!\"
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A man walks into a bar, absolutely infuriated. He grabs a seat and hunches over. The bartender leans over, sayin \"What can I get\'ya\". The man orders a beer. As the bartender gives him the beer he asks him why he\'s in such a mood. The man replies saying \" Kran are jerks man, i got beatin\' up again!\" Suddenly, a being who the Ylian couldn\'t see in the back stood up. \"HEY BUDDY, I TAKE OFFENCE TO THAT!\" The man sitting down scowels and says \"What? Are you a Kran?\" The man replies \"NO, IM A JERK\".
(Joke adjusted because of swear mask; substitute jerk with @$$hole.)
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Kran1 and Kran2 were both patients in a mental hospital. One day while they were walking past the hospital swimming pool, Kran1 suddenly jumped into the deep end. Kran1 sank to the bottom of the pool and stayed there. Kran2 promptly jumped in to save Kran1. Kran2 swam to the bottom and pulled Kran1 out. When the hospital director became aware of Kran2\'s heroic act he immediately ordered that Kran2 be discharged from the hospital because she now considered Kran2 to be mentally stable. The director went to Kran2 and said, \"I have some good news and some bad news. The good news is that you\'re being discharged because you responded so rationally to a crisis by jumping in the pool to save the life of another patient. Your action displays sound mindedness. The bad news is that Kran1, the patient you saved, hung himself in the bathroom with his bathrobe belt right after you saved Kran1. I am so sorry, but he\'s dead.\" Kran2 replied, \"He didn\'t hang himself. I put him there to dry. How soon can I go home?\"
*sigh* Yes, these are rather Anti-Kran... but i thought you might enjoy them all the same :D
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One day, a Kran was putting together a puzzle. He was really stumped and very frustrated, so He decided to ask a friend for help.
He was about to say, \'\'It\'s supposed to be a tiger!\'\'
But just then his friend said, \"Put the Frosted Flakes back in the box!\'\' 8)
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HAHAHA! thats a good one!
I like mine though. The first one is lame unfortunately the last is the best.
Got another one though.
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One day a young Kran was pulling his wagon about the country-side.
He came to a pile of mud and his wagon got stuck.
\"Son of a bitch!\" Exclaimed the young Kran.
A old wise Ylian who was studying nearby heard the exclamation, and went to see who said it.
\"Better look out, Laanx and Talad are everywhere, listening to everything you say,\"
The young Kran stopped tugging on the wagon. Enthralled by this sentence, he asked;
\"So they are in the trees?\"
\"Aye, lad.\"
\"In the rocks?\"
\"Those too.\"
\"They are even in my wagon?!\"
\"Yes, young Kran, they are even in your wagon,\"
The young Kran has had enough and just wants his wagon out of the mud.
\"Well tell them to get their asses out and push we\'re stuck!\"
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Three friends die and go to the AfterLife. The first guy gets bound to one of the ugliest girls there.
\'\'Why?\'\' he asks.
Talad replies, \'\'When you were nine you killed a bird with a stone.\'\' The same happens to the second guy. He asks \"why?\".
Talad replies, \'\'When you were nine you killed a bird with a stone.\'\' The third guy laughs at his friends and says, \'\'I?m glad I didn\'t do anything like that.\'\' He gets bound to the prettiest girl in there. The other two guys ask, \'\'Why?\'\'
\'\'Because when she was nine she killed two birds with one stone.\'\' :D
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The best joke:
CB will be released soon
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Originally posted by BeastOfC
The best joke:
CB will be released soon
That\'s the best one i ever heard hehe
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CTRL + ALT + DELETE
Running...
Kranbash.exe
------------------End Process
/run Make_Fun_of_Enkidukai.rtf
How did the Enkidukai take first prize at the bird show?
He just opened the cage and took it, nitwit.
Who does an Enkidukai visit if his tail is hacked off in battle?
A retailer, of course.
Cars run on gas. Some trains run on steam. Golf carts run on electricity. What do Enkidukai run on?
Their paws. What were you thinking?
***WARNING: LAME.wm.src Virus Detected.***
Norton AntiVirus has detected a lame joke attempting to install itself on your computer. Scroll down to proceed as normal.
What do you call the Enkidukai who swallowed a duck?
A duck filled fatty puss.
That not bad enough for you?
Disclaimer: EXTREME LAMENESS. Not for women who may be pregnant, or those who have had recent heart trauma.
If ten Enkidukai are in a boat, and one jumps off, how many are left?
None... the rest were all copy cats!!
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***WARNING!:
Original Joke that may contain LAME.wm.src Virus Detected.***
Would you like to open this file anyway?
Joke:
A Kran walked into a crowBar,
@ least that?s what the friend of the dwarf holding the crowbar told him?
:D
/run Joke_to_PS_Covertion_Script.exe??????
??????????????????????????????????????????????.
Malamute x Pointer = Moot Point, favorites of lawyers but ... it doesn\'t seem to matter.
Bull Terrier x $hitzu = Bull$hitzu, a gregarious but unreliable breed.
Pointer x Setter = Poinsetter, a traditional Christmas pet in Yliakum.
Kerry Blue Terrier x Skye Terrier = Blue Skye, a dog for visionaries & thoughts of the Azure Way.
Great Pyrenees x Dachshund = Pyradachs, a puzzling breed favored by Talad somewhat.
Pekingnese x Lhasa Apso = Peekasso, an abstract dog, something they would draw in the Art Forum...
Labrador Retriever x Curly Coated Retriever = Lab Coat Retriever, the choice of researching Zatcha.
Newfoundland x Basset Hound = Newfound Asset Hound, a dog for Financial Advisors, & Traders.
Terrier x Bulldog = Terribull, a dog that makes awful mistakes, usually attaches it?s self to lame jokes.
Bloodhound x Labrador = Blabador, a dog that barks incessantly.
Collie x Malamute = Commute, a dog that travels with you every day.
Deerhound x Terrier = Derriere, a dog that\'s true to the end.
!ERROR: This Program has caused an Illegal Error & must be closed,
Would you like to send an Error Report?
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A Kran comes into the Hydlaa tavern with a brand new helmet, showing it proudly to the others. Everybody is amazed about how robust it is, and asks were he bought it. The other day the same Kran enters the Tavern but this time without the helmet but with a hat on is head. ?Where?s your helmet?? asks someone. The Kran replies: ?I use a hat now because I found out that a normal hat is far more robust than a helmet for I dropped both from the dungeon exit tower, and the hat stayed intact.?
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*chuckles*
*sigh* kran are just so EASY to make fun of :P
I think we should also start a quotes thread. Anyone with aineko\'s chat log could help out. Just go through and find any funny qoutes from the game :)
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Zeraph you must be an Enki as well, for you, too, are a copy cat!!
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Enki blood proudly flows through my Veins!
:] Oh, I also have some White Tiger in me to, good for Animal Trainning:
(http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v122/Zeraph/Zph.jpg)
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What do you call PvP between to Enki?
- a catfight :D
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Q:How do you confuse somone new?
A:Tell them \"j\" is crouch:P
Q:Why did the stonebreaker cross the road?
A:It didn\'t they don\'t exist yet!:D
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Originally posted by FESFES
Q:Why did the stonebreaker cross the road?
A:It didn\'t they don\'t exist yet!:D
Stonebreakers exist, i\'m pretty sure about it for i\'m a stonebreaker myself. Roads do exist too :D
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He meant Hammerwielder...
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No-Name Snake is the tenderest snake you can buy? 8)
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(http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v122/Zeraph/twins.jpg)
(http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v122/Zeraph/twinsBack.jpg)
\"Siamese Conjoined Twins\"
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Originally posted by BeastOfC
The best joke:
CB will be released soon
DAMNIT, they had me fooled with all of this testing. :(
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a man walks into a bar and see a kran with a parrot on his shoulder. Amazed he asks \"were did u get such a marvelous pet\" the parrot replies \"he\'s not\"
thats all i had
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I hereby propose the first dirty PS joke: Enjoy.
A stonebreaker, A ylian and a Kran (yes a kran, the joke involves a kran so what, keep reading :P) walk into Kada\'s Tavern. They all greet kada with warm smiles on thier faces. \"How was the day?\" Kada exclaims to the new patrons. \"Great\" said the Ylian, \"I killed 3 trepor today!\" \"Thats quite a haul there mighty warrior.\" Kada said softly to the ylian \"Why don\'t I fix you an ale on the house.\" \"Don\'t be so quick to poor him ale M\'lady.\" said the kran slowely stuttering his words (Aw shuddup the kran don\'t speak good, thats not the joke here :P) \"I bested 24 good men today in duels at the Arena. They fought bravely but I prevailed due to my great physique.\" \"My! That is a great achievement\" Kada said with excitement. \"Here, take these ale and I\'ll send a fenki to give you a nice long bath\" \"Thank you M\'lady, I am much obliged to you.\" \"Aw you two don\'t know anything! I had to walk through Hydlaa Square today in the Worst traffic I\'ve Ever seen!\" Said the stonebreaker. \"It was horrible!\" Kada and the two warriors laughed heartily at this comment thinking he was kidding. \"surely you jest\" said the Ylian, \"I travel that route every day, its not a big achievement as ours\" \"Hey screw you, Your not 4 feet tall. that may not sound too bad to you, but you people never clean your asses and I have to walk right up to them\"
X\'D I hope you like it, again this is a dirty joke so please be kind Mods I don\'t mean to offend.
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Here is a good one :) :
A Kran that is not from Hydlaa comes there to buisness.
After staying a week he gets back to his town but when he is on his way, at Hydlaa gate there is a merchant selling some sticks that when u pass them on a rock it gets fire.
He was Impressed by that and want to take one box to his wife.
When he gets to his wife he says \"Kshonkemfisku( cool name huh ?) ), look what I get in Hydlaa. Some sticks that make fire!!\", than taking the sticks that make fire from his bag \"Look\" Than he show her the sticks and pass them on to a rock, but nothing happens. Then he say \"What is the problem with those? I tested them all!\"
Funny huh?
Another one :) :
A very rich Kran (I dont know how he got that rich...) was going to Hydlaa when he sees other Krans eating grass.
Then he asks \"Why are you eating grass?\"
Then the guys answer \"Because we dont have anything more to eat...\" and start crying...
\"Dont cry\" says the rich Kran, I will take u to my house.
\"But sire I have wife and children!\"
\"Bring them too\"
\"And my friend?\"
\"U can bring him\"
Then the friend says\"I have wife and children too!\"
\"Bring \'em on!\" says the rich Kran
In the way to his mansion in Hydlaa he says
\"you will love my house. THE GRASS IS THREE FEET HIGH\"
Funny... very funny
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That second one amused me, but talk about joining the Kran trend, I would have made it about Dermorians... Krans would eat dirt and stones first.
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Originally posted by Adeli
That second one amused me, but talk about joining the Kran trend, I would have made it about Dermorians... Krans would eat dirt and stones first.
Yes, I think the only thing Krans will never do is starve, considering that they are literally living inside their food.
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That\'s very true, that should be coded in-game.
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you are right...
(Just that to say...)
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I fund this one from a hammerwielder female...
Why are dwarves sexuality boring ?
-> Did you ever do love with someone who haven\'t taken a bath since two years ?
Another one :
Do you know how to be sure of killing a troll without fighting ?
-> Just ask to the Dwarf who is on your party to let his shoes... the sockets smell will run like a toxic gas... (but you... you have to run away !!!)
still another one ? oh... ok !
Same begin as the first :
Why are fenki sexuality boring ?
-> that\'s well know... cats are quick ;-)
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Hmm... Dwarves don\'t bathe?
OT: I just realised where I knew your signature picture from! The Sorcerer from the Player\'s Handbook.
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really you learn that to me because in fact I fund this one on Google image and I never fund the original picture... everybody seems to take this one...
What\'s \"Player\'s Handbook\" ?
I don\'t want to be off topic so...
a little one :
Why is there not a lot of children in Yliakum ?
-> cause the most female characters are male in boring real life...
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Originally posted by FlippySeal
and as for that Skizzik guy, who Cirque called a \"nasty piece of work\" i couldn\'t agree more Cirque, i couldn\'t agree more!
Aaah, so quick to judge *sigh*. Know what or who you\'re talking about before making such claims.
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WARNING ADULT CONTENT!!!!!!!
FOR MATURE ONLY!!!!!!
CONTAINS A STUPID JOKE-THING!!!!!
Once apon a time there were 3 elves. They went everywhere together and did stuff together. Once they stumbled unto sacred land of the dwarfs. Only two of them went through and only then followed by the third, why?
A sighn said \"NO TRES-PASSING!!!\"
TRES in spanish means 3... no I am not spanish..
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Whats rarer than a Dwarf, who doesn\'t drink beer?
--> A Kran who hates sand
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Community joke:
What happenns if a Double-As and a Tripple-As team up?
Awnser: Foul Play!
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LOOOL
here\'s one:
A noob asks: \"What do I do with these Diamonds?\"
Someone answers: \"Give them to me!\"
The noob: \"Why should I do that?\"
Someone: \"I\'m a super NPC that gives money for crystals\"
The noob: \"Ok, how do I transfer them?\"
(Based on real facts)
Another one:
A Kran looks at two maps, one of the whole Yliakum and another of Hydlaa in a book and says to the library-keeper: \"Hey this maps are wrong! It shows that Hydlaa is bigger than Yliakum!\"
(it\'s a bad one, I know)
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Modified from another joke:
A Nolthir, a Ylian, and a Stonebreaker walk into a Kada-El\'s tavern together. They each buy an ale. Just as they are about to enjoy their beverages, a fly lands in each of their drinks and gets stuck in the head.
The Nolthir pushes his ale away in disgust.
The Ylian fishes the fly out and continues drinking as if nothing happened.
The Stonebreaker also picks the fly out of his drink, but then holds it out over the beer and yells, ?Spit it out! Spit it out, you bastard!?
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LOL
Q: What is born when a Diaboly and a God go to bed?
A: Borns an atheist god
_________________
Q: If a Klyro and a Kran cross, what borns?
A: A non-flying kryro
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the worth joke U\'ll never heard... ready ?
I know when will CB released.
November the 31th
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ok ok I apologize with another one :
Do you know how to make if u wanna see a mad kran ?
-> send him to a round piece and tell him there is a crystal in a corner... (hmmm maybe this is only a french expression so maybe it doesnt work in english... so another one).
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In a very far tavern a kran comes from its (him ? her ? i dunno how to tell that so its) room and ask for a glass of water at the reception, then it goes upstair and come back 5 minutes after to ask another time for a glass of water... 5 minutes after it come back to the reception so the man who give it the glass ask :
Why are u doing with this glasses kran ?
and the kran answer : my room is burning...
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/me bows
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Another Community joke:
What\'s the difference between an Moderator and an Super-Moderator
-->Answer: !tnereffid si eman eht
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lol, \"the name is different\".
another one:
A Dwarf goes to a tavern and asks with a feminine voice: \"I want a drink\"
The bartender looks at the dwarf and says: \"I only serve drinks to pretty woman and men with a MALE voice!\"
The Dwarf goes home to practice his voice: \"I want a drink\" ; \"I want a drink\" ; \"I want a drink\" .
The next day he goes to the tavern and says: \"I want a drink\"
The bartender looks at him and answers: Wine or Beer?
The Dwarf looks at the bartender and answers: Damn! I wasn\'t counting on that!
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ROFL! ROFL!
Maybe one of the best jokes I\'ve heard for long:
A dwarf, who passes by a tavern.
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Originally posted by Merdarion
Another Community joke:
What\'s the difference between an Moderator and an Super-Moderator
-->Answer: !tnereffid si eman eht
*looks for a punchline of some kind*
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That was my initial response Moogie.
Are you saying a super-moderator doesn\'t do anything special?
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I\', just saying that there isn\'t a big difference between Mod & Super-Mod
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*takes a feeble attempt at reviving this thread*
An Ylian, an Enkidukai and a Kran walk into a bar.
After realising it?s a gay bar, the Enkidukai and Ylian walk out.
Yeah...
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What\'s the worst thing about CB.
The Answer: ydaer t\'nsi tI.
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Ok here\'s one funny small story/ long joke I made :
A tavern from Hydlaa city which was well know in the whole PS world for it\'s extremely good ale (which btw had a very nice price) was going to open after a week of pause because the innkeeper went in vacation (he would have stayed there more if the population in PS wouldn\'t have revolted).
So one day Litter John, a pretty big Dwarf (he had 1,41 m which for a dwarf is very impressive) goes to the tavern in the morning but surprise ... there was a huge queue at the entrance in the tavern.
First he passed an Ylian who was standing in line, but the Ylian got mad and got him by his hand and kicked him 5 m away.
Poor John was so mad he runes fast and put himself in front of a Dermorian. The Dermorian couldn\'t stand his attitude and made a fireball magic and kicked poor Litter John 15 m away and let him in fire.
The small dwarf (even if he could be considered a big dwarf for his height among the other dwarfs) jumped in a lake to stop the fire and after 5 min he tried again to get in the Inn. Then he claimed in a catapult and lunch himself in front of the line where a big Kran was waiting for the Inn to open. The Kran was so mad he took the dwarf by his head and throwed him 1 km away...
At this moment the poor dwarf got sick with it all and sad \" F**K them, I?m going back in my vacation and they may protest as much as they want ... Jerks \".
:D that\'s my litter story hope you read it even if it\'s a bit big. Sorry for language mistakes, I?m from Romania
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What\'s the difference between a thief and a bell?
One steals from the people and one peals from the steeple.
BTW: I was talking about thieves in Planeshift.
What do you call a Kran with no leg?
A \"Kranputee!\"
Hehe...
What do you sing to a Dwarf on his birthday?
Yo shorty, it\'s your birthday, we\'re gonna party like it\'s your birthday.
Lame, but...
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Originally posted by Dauntless
Ok here\'s one funny small story/ long joke I made :
A tavern from Hydlaa city which was well know in the whole PS world for it\'s extremely good ale (which btw had a very nice price) was going to open after a week of pause because the innkeeper went in vacation (he would have ..
That one was funny :)
Just an idea, what if we make books ingame with stories like these that you can find / trade?
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Originally posted by Androgos
Just an idea, what if we make books ingame with stories like these that you can find / trade?
Go ahead :D Would be cool.
In fact, having lots of \'collectors items\' would be good ingame.
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Lots of planeshifters are in a crowd. Two of them walk upto each other.
They talk to each other then walk away.
Another two walk to each other and talk to each other.
Now you may think what is the point of this story.
The answer is the same answer as to what is the point of life, the answer is to waste your time.
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hehe, keep the jokes commin :D
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Originally posted by karakth
Once there was a huge Kran, who everyone feared. The Kran weilded two large swords, and had a fierce reputation all across Hydlaa.
But one day, a small dwarf went up to the Kran and began making fun of the Kran\'s intelligence, which to be fair was slightly lower than average. The Kran took no notice of him, thinking it best that he ignored the small annoying dwarf.
This went on for several days, until finally the Kran could take it no more. \"That\'s it!!!\" he shouted, \"I\'m going to squish you to the seventh level!!!\"
\"Sorry man,\" the Dwarf was quick to reply, \"...Fighting won\'t be implemented until Crystal Blue.\"
And the dwarf was safe forever :)
the kran can have his revenge now, poor dwarf
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Originally posted by SaintNuclear
Originally posted by Kada-El
Two Kran walk into the bar......... :rolleyes: You\'d think one of them would\'ve seen it!
ROFL :D
Originally posted by Cirque
Nah that was kinda decent. Not sure how the Kran roleplayers will feel about the implication that theyre stupid lol.
I don\'t mind jokes about Krans being stupid (and they\'re not, it\'s a misinterpretation of their page X( ), as long as the joke is good.
ROFL!!!! :D :D :D
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A kran and an enki jump off the tower in hydlaa at the same time
Who hits the ground first and why.................................-
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The enki-
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The kran had to ask for directions :D
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LOL
I thought it would be the Kran because he\'s heavier...
*thinks in a similar joke
A Nolthrir and a Kran were competing to see who would get to the surface of the water in less time.
They start at the same time, who get\'s there first?
The Kran, his brainless head makes him float
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Shut it LB and everyone else, stop the Kran jokes (I laugh with them but...)
Acording to the players guide
They are not one of most intelligent races of Yliakum, but they tend to be loyal and firm in their beliefs.
We aren\'t the most inteligent race in Yliakum but it doesn\'t mean we\'re stupid, there may be races even more stupid than Krans.
thinks in an Enki joke
A darn... can\'t remember one...
makes a stupid and confused face
Me too stupid :( Me have no brain
You have brain to Zagro?
EDIT: Also the Enki was more stupid than the Kran, the Enki jumped, the Kran didn\'t :P
Well, I don\'t mind if Kran jokes, but only if they are good like the \"jumping from the tower\" one. Just thought I had to defend the Krans.
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A kran theif walks into a house at night and hears a voice. \"Talad is watching you\"
the kran shouts \"WHAT?!?!?!? where are you!\"
Talad is watching you
The kran turns on a light and says \"Your only a parrot!\"
the parrot replies \"Im only a parrot but Talad is a doberman\"
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Originally posted by Lordbug
LOL
I thought it would be the Kran because he\'s heavier...
Hate to ruin your fun, but objects fall faster because of shape, not weight. :P
Edit: Is not mass weight?
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nope, not acording to my phisics book...
tell me, if something with the same shape, mass but diferent weight and are pushed with the same strength what is the one that falls faster?
It\'s not shape either, it\'s gravity :P anyway, gravity pushes heavier stuff easier than light ones... My mom called me to take the trash out and I forgot what I was saying... :( I had pretty good arguments...
Well this is a joke thread, let\'s try to keep on topic.
There was a Kran in a vilage that ppl had the habit to make fun of him, every day someone put a in a table a circle and an octa to see what what he would choose. The Kran looked at the coins and picked the octa and walked away very happy while the ones that did that laughed very hard at what he always did.
One day a friend asked him \"Why do you choose the octa instead of the circle?\"
The Kran answered \"Are you joking? If I choose the circle how am I suposed to get money?\"
Happy New Year!!!
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Mass is not weight. Weight depends upon what you\'re standing on. You\'d weigh less on an asteroid. However, mass is how much matter is within you, and is independent of the setting.
However, once you get into relativistic speeds, you can gain mass, so really you want to talk of inertia, not mass, for certain things.
Now then, Lordbug, if something has the same mass, it has the same weight on a given surface, say a planet. Falling has nothing to do with mass. However, lifting depends on inertia (an object\'s tendency to stay at a constant velocity until a force is acted upon it). It takes more energy to move objects with more inertia because they resist change much more than ones with less inertia, but that has absolutely nothing to do with how quickly something will hit the ground.
I hope to have cleared this up.
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*check his physics book
I never said that mass and weight is the same thing
Mass has nothing to do with weight (as I said) mass is invariable, but weight is.
I only said that 2 things with the same shape and mass and DIFERENT weight blabla... so if I said that there\'s no way that I could thought that mass and weight are the same thing.
Also I know the law of inertia, a body has the tendency to be like it is, if it\'s moving it keeps moving if there\'s no force stopping it, if it\'s in rest it stais in rest. That\'s why we need to have a seatbelt when we are in a car.
A heavier thing will fall faster.
We should keep on topic ppl (have no joke)
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this one sucks
how many dwarves does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
none since their are none!
8o it sucked here is a real one....
why did the dwarf die???????
he is dumb as all hell and forgot to breathe....
dwarves suck!!!!!!!!!!
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Mass poisoning occurred last Sunday in Ojaveda after the arrival of new toys to the city market.
Apparently all the victims were Enkidukai.
As it has been determined later, all the suffered had accidently swallowed plastic toys of a Micky Mouse.
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Originally posted by Lordbug
*check his physics book
I never said that mass and weight is the same thing
Mass has nothing to do with weight (as I said) mass is invariable, but weight is.
I only said that 2 things with the same shape and mass and DIFERENT weight blabla... so if I said that there\'s no way that I could thought that mass and weight are the same thing.
Also I know the law of inertia, a body has the tendency to be like it is, if it\'s moving it keeps moving if there\'s no force stopping it, if it\'s in rest it stais in rest. That\'s why we need to have a seatbelt when we are in a car.
A heavier thing will fall faster.
We should keep on topic ppl (have no joke)
I\'m sorry but that is wrong. Have you never dropped a flat piece of paper and a balled up one? They weigh the same, yet the balled up one hits the ground first. Shape does have an effect on things falling. If you take two pieces of paper, tape them together (leaving them still flat) and take one balled up piece, the balled up piece will still hit first, even though the other object weighs twice as much!
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galileo is not wrong but his laws have to do with airodynamics
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Lordbug, you\'re still missing the point; you cannot change something\'s weight without changing the gravity that\'s affecting it. To have two objects with the same shape and mass, and a different weight, would require, say, a planet and an asteroid.
And yes, gravity does affect lighter mass objects easier than heavy mass objects, when it comes to lifting them up anyway. Why? Because the gravity is caused by a massive object in the first place (well, it\'s really caused by gravity well formed in the fabric of space-time, but let\'s not get into that).
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Exactly, I mean why do you think somethings just stop accellerating at a certain speed and cannot go any further? It\'s due to their mass and their aerodynamics. For instance, raindrops stop accelerating about 40% of their path to the earth. Why don\'t you think they keep getting faster and faster and faster untill they just shoot through us like bullets?
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there are many factors affecting speed at which something falls: aerodynanics is one, weight ISN\'T one, mass is one and force... if you throw something down it falls faster than something just dropped..
basic physics come on people and lets move right along...
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a kran, a dwarf and a diaboli must go infront of a mirror and say something about themselves but they cant lie because if they lie the mirror will swallow them!
so the diaboli goes infront of a mirror and says: \"i think that i am the prettiest in cristal blue!\" and the mirror swallows the diaboli
the dwarf goes infront of the mirror and says: \"I think that i am the smartest one in cristalblue\" and the mirror swallows him too.
a krat goes infront of the mirror and says: \"I think ...\" and the mirror swallosws the kran!
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Well, it has not much to do with shape or aerodynamic, The heavier object is affected stronger by gravity but also affected stronger by the idleness of mass, which means that they are harder to get to move, while the lighter object isnt affected so much by idleness and gravity. Both fall at same speed. (here is where shape and aerodinamic comes into play, they make the minor difference)
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Two Krans went fishing, and found an excellent spot. One kran has a bright idea and marks the spot by painting an X on the bottom of the boat. The other kran says, \"You\'re stupid. What if we come back and don\'t get the same boat?\"
When Kran\'s first started sending up astronauts into space, they quickly discovered that ballpoint pens would not work in zero gravity. To combat the problem, Kran scientists spent a decade and $12 billion to develop a pen that writes in zero gravity, upside down, underwater, on almost any surface including glass and at temperatures ranging from below freezing to 300o C. The Enkidukai\'s used a pencil.
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You all aware that Enkidukai\'s starting intelligence is lower than Kran\'s, right?
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everyone bashes krans..... from the begining of time
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Y DID DA KID DEI?????!!?!!?!??????! LOL CAUSE HE DID NOT HAEV 3NOUGH HP!!!
used a translater to make myself look nerdier, sorry but this game needs help and i am starting to work with 3d models soon, man it will be great!!!!!!! it was a dis :)
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Did you know that in the players guild it stands that Krans is made of silicon.. We could make boobies of them :P.. No im just kidding :)
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ok when do you no you have to much time on your hands....
when your thinking of jokes for PS
lol
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You might want to read this (http://www.planeshift3d.com/wbboard/thread.php?threadid=11371&boardid=13&sid=925c11a057f169035ffaef17b7fb6c48), GideoN.
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Interesting idea.. But i wasnt serious :P . Just said that so i could bully my brother
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Dwarfs do not cook well.
This is why you never eat them:
(http://zeraph.ps-mc.com/DrawfzMakeBadFood.jpg)
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Originally posted by Skizzik
Originally posted by Zeraph
When is one of the only times Enkidukai jump into the water?
When there fur is on fire!
That reminds me of that joke \"When are you allowed to spit at a Turkish woman?\" \"When her mustache is on fire\". The difference is that that one was actually half-funny, since it was implying that Turkish woman have mustaches. Implying that Enkidukais have fur is not even nearly funny, since they do have fur.
p.s. TYPO ALERT!!! \"their fur\", not \"there fur\"
*edit*
And no I don\'t know any PS Jokes, so don\'t ask.
I don\'t know how global jokes are but in this case you must be dutch ;) :biggrin:
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1.why has every Enkiduka accused of a crime been convicted
because everyone so far\'s been caught red handed.
2.how do you get rid of a rival kran?
you challenge him to a swimming contest.
3.Why\'d the magic hat that the novice klyros was performing with have a big dent in the side of it?
The klyros had been told to wing it.
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two Krans walking in the desert one to the other, Okay now i want to walk in the middle
a enkidukai comes into the tavern makes a triple salto lands on the bar and orders a beer.
a second enkidukai enters makes a quadruppeled salto lands on the bar and orders a drink like nothing happened
finally a tirth enkidukai enters makes a triple salto followed by a single backflip lands on the bar and orders a beer like nothing happened.
Woooow the bartender says, you guys are good what do you do for a living. well we are circus performers one of the enkidukai says. We are here with the circus that has just hit town this morning.
After a while a dwarf enters makes a triple salto followed by a double backflip lands on the bar and orders a big mug off beer like nothing happened.
WOOOOOOOOWWWWWWWWWWWWWW the bartender says, you are really good are you with the circus too?
No says the dwarf you better get that carpet fixed at the entrance it\'s loose, before someone breaks his neck
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Why are Krans very stupid, but still appreciated?
Because they rock!
(argh! very bad :P)
Why do Kran pray when they are walking?
Because faith moves mountains...
(no comments...)
How do we call a Dwarf between 4 Krans?
Noise.
(yeah you have to have some physical notions to understand it, but it still be bad...)
What name do we give to the Parkinson\'s disease when a Kran has it?
An earthquake...
(okay im stopping here :P)
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Awesome thread! More, PLEASE !!!
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(17:26:47) Barandai says: does anyone know something about food?
(17:27:27) Clover says: Don\'t eat rotten meat, it\'s made of dwarves :)
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*two dwarfs are in the bar*
(17:29:53) Kaseijin says: this bar wasn\'t made with dwarf in mind
(17:31:54) Clover says: Maybe they could stand on each others shoulders *braces for the barrage of mugs*
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A Kran, out in the wilderness, decides he needs to \"go\". He squats down, and begins to do his business.
A bold young Enkidukai, who\'s hoping to be known as a great explorer some day, happens by and notices the Mighty Kran. \"Wow!\" he thinks, and realizing that he needs to \"go\" himself, decides to take this opportunity to commune with this great beast. He parks alongside the Kran, and waits expectantly.
And for awhile, nothing happens... the two go about their business without a word.
Then suddenly, the Mighty Kran speaks. \"Pardon me, but when you... go... does it stick to your fur?\"
The Enkidukai is awestruck! His opinion is being sought on the most important of topics! \"Yes, yes it does! A lot!\" he exclaims.
The Mighty Kran reaches over, and grabs him by the neck. \"Good,\" he says, and proceeds to wipe.
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What comes out if you push a Kran down a ledge?
Rock \'n\' Roll
How can you keep a Kran busy for an unlimited amount of time?
Take a sheet of paper and write on both sides \"Please Turn!\"
Three Dermorians go into a wood,
none comes out,
why?
they all forgot the time while hugging the trees (Well if there are so many)
Two newts wander through Hydlaa, all of a sudden a Klyros flies over them,
One newt to the other When I am big i am also going to be a pilot
And last but not least:
Two insane stonebreakers broke out of the \'sanctuary\',
They get by an Stonebreaker girl, who is desperatly trying to smith a sword.
One asks why she is so desperate,
on what she replies that it broke and now she cant hunt down gobbles to get the precious Rotten Meat.
So one of the two decides to resmith the sword and the other says that he will walk on slowly so that the other one can catch up.
After a short time of wandering the other mad dwarf catches up a wonderful forged sword in his hands.
Where did you get that sword? the dwarf asks
Well after I smithed the sword the girl said that I should come with her,
She led me behind a house, pulled of her shirt, pulled of her pants and said that i should take what i want,
wll I took the sword He replied.
Right, right, I think that her pants wouldnt have fit you anyways
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Why did Krans always learn magic ways in a group of 3 ?
One to read, one other to write, and the last to watch over this 2 dangerous intellectuals.
Mmmm, well it was a try...
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don\'t tell a joke to a kran...it might crack him up
ok... how about some jokes about humans?...
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A man walked up to a dwarf, pulled down his beard and tried to reach into his mouth. The dwarf stepped back and swatted the man\'s hand away and said, \"What the hell did you do that for?\" The man replied, \"Oh, I\'m sorry. I thought you were a sack.\"
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Why did the chicken cross the road?
To get to the claymore.
Yeah....I\'m not much of a comedian.
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These two sprang to my mind when seeing the Klyros models:
(not strictly jokes but more statements)
1) There\'s something fishy about these people.
2) Will you be my wingman? (This one really has the potential of becoming extremely annoying :P)
Yeah, maybe not too funny but still. ;)