Many of you have probably seen these questions poping up everywhere.... And it\'s getting quite annoying. So I took the liberty to answer them for all:
Answers to all your questions.
If a deaf person swears, does his mother wash his hands with soap?
A: Probably not.
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If someone with multiple personalities threatens to kill himself, is it considered a hostage situation?
A: No, it is still a mental condition (or multiple mental conditions that lead to one greater outcome).
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Is there another word for synonym?
A: Acording to MS word, no.
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Isn\'t it a bit unnerving that doctors call what they do \"practice?\"
A: If you don\'t like it, don\'t go to a doctor.
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When sign makers go on strike, is anything written on their signs?
A: How does a robot with a spraycan arm go on strike?
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When you open a bag of cotton balls, is the top one meant to be thrown away?
A: What?
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Where do forest rangers go to \"get away from it all?\"
A: To their mommies... Where they cry about what kind of crapy jobs they have.
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Why isn\'t there mouse-flavored cat food?
A: Because it is cheaper to make Grade B cat food that tastes like rotten meat.
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What do you do when you see an endangered animal eating an endangered plant?
A: You take out a rare antique sword, and slay both.
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If a parsley farmer is sued, can they garnish his wages?
A: No.
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Would a fly without wings be called a walk?
A: No. It would be called dead.
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Why do they lock gas station bathrooms? Are they afraid someone will clean them?
A: Gas station bathrooms are locked so no one sets them aflame.
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If a stealth bomber crashes in a forest, will it make a sound?
A: If no one is around, no. \"Sound\" is the interpretation of molecular movement. If you cut out the interpreter, there will be only molecular movement, but no \"sound\".
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If a turtle doesn\'t have a shell, is he homeless or naked?
A: Acording to the discovery chanel, niether. It\'s dead.
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Why don\'t sheep shrink when it rains?
A: Because you touch yourself at night.
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Can vegetarians eat animal crackers?
A: Sure.
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If the police arrest a mime, do they tell him he has the right to remain silent?
A: Yes.
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Why do they put Braille on the drive-through bank machines?
A: Because it\'s too expensive making two different kinds of key-pads/cases for bank machines. So they only make ones with Braille on them.
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How do they get the deer to cross at that yellow road sign?
A: They don\'t. And from what I\'ve seen, they don\'t get the cars to slow down either.
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Why do they sterilize the needles for lethal injections?
A: To make sure that the bacteria on the needle will in no way effect the substance that is being injected.
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Why did kamikaze pilots wear helmets?
A: While flying, the special design of a pilots helmet reduces preasure on the ears.
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Is it true that cannibals don\'t eat clowns because they taste funny?
A: No.
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What was the best thing before sliced bread?
A: Any kind of food. You can only enjoy the convenience of sliced bread if there is no food shortage. Like most people, if I\'m starving, any kind of food is just as good as sliced bread.
