PARODY THREAD:
http://planeshift3d.com/wbboard/thread.php?threadid=22618&boardid=13&styleid=4Perhaps I could interest you in a wonderful business opportunity, sure to benefit you (the common adventurer) and ultimately bring wealth and opulence to the great city of Hydlaa. What? What do you mean it sounds fishy? Oh, come off it. The system is quite ingenious actually and simple to understand... Here we go.
Now you, the common adventurer, are sure to notice that your coffers may be on the... let\'s just say, empty side. Well after this new system, you\'ll not only be able to hold that nifty claymore, you can use it too! Harniquist may be a mean old coot when you\'re low on cash, but after this new program you\'ll have the adorably tightfisted sonava... err kran, bowing at your feet!
How does it work? It\'s easy! The keyword is interest. It\'s a wonderful use of vernacular really, seeing as you are now using it to listen at this very moment. I can tell by the lack of jingle in your pockets you must be very interested to make money with this exploit- I mean ethical new program.
But interest has a different definition! You see, if a friend asked for a few extra tria, you should be expected to run a SMALL fee for the service, correct? I mean, handing out money is nice and all but it doesn\'t exactly pay the bills, right? Right? Ok ok, just bear with me, please sir.
Say you need 300 tria. Well now you can! We can give it to you in no time, after we calculate the interest of course. Now perhaps I didn\'t explain what interest was, but I\'ll tell you what it is. It\'s wonderful! It\'s new! It helps the community and it\'s just darned dandy! By trying this service you have to ensure me that I will see fruits for the wonderful service. And the prices are great!
The concept is based off the wonderful idea that after a set period of time, you will slowly become ensla.... I mean debted to me in SMALL increments. But don\'t fret! After you earn your money, you\'ll soon make much more! Money makes money! You can\'t get anywhere without it! Don\'t leave! Just sit down, darnit! Hold on!
Say you recieve 2000 tria, and you\'re able to get all the equipment you need to start your small business of rat infestation. You could have your debts paid off in less than 5 hours*! Here! I\'m sure this will interest you. With this simple equation you can figure out how long it will take you to pay off the service, and how much happiness you will have after you get all that cool nifty stuff!
Now here is the reference. U= Final Amount R= Money in YOUR pocket M=Magical number for compounded interest. Don\'t worry about it. Y= Decay factor (a simple adition of 1+ the rate) S= Rate per months L= Months paid through A= Fee added per 500 tria V= Tax Paid to Hydlaa Octarchs E= Needed fees for Cabali thu- You know what, let\'s just not ask questions about this one
The SIMPLE equation is here. U= R*M(Y+S)^L+A*V+E
So let\'s see that small fee after you insert your amount! Ok, devide... find the square root.... Um... ok... 400*302..... Um ok! So if you want 2000 tria, you will only owe.... 932,141,412 tria in 4 months! Um wait. Ok I think I messed up. Don\'t worry though! You\'ll have it paid off in- Please! Just sit down!
Drats. That\'s the 4th one I\'ve lost this week...
*Results may vary
**This Thread Has Been A Kixie Presentation
*** Karyuu Approved
