I hope nobody takes these the wrong way because there not meant to be:
\"God may love you, but I sure as hell don\'t!\"
\"Why should you work if there\'s welfare.\"
\"School is for a couple of things, sleeping, eating, talking, and a couple of other things i can\'t say on this website\"
and finally \"You\'ll have to speak up, I\'m wearing a towel\"
the last one works because towels are the only thing i wear.