Fanomatic, your horrific Dungeon Keeper-esque tale has inspired me to write a short story. I hope everyone likes it.
It was Noon. Not that one would have been able to tell with the dark clouds looming overhead predicting rain. Lovely weather. Fantasy\'s maggots of the dark had made a clean kidnapping. The princess was unharmed, and the causualties of the guards trying to save her were all humerous and creative. She was now held in the top room of his tower. Each floor leading up were dangerous and decidedly differant from the ones below or above.
Suddenly trumpets blared. As Fantasy looked below, he saw a noble tall knight, and his young squire. The Knight was tall, proud, and noble to look at. His squire was clever, respectable, and caring. Their heads would look lovely on my mantle. Fantasy pressed the button opening the front entrance (There were several buttons that set off traps, dropped floors to lava, and opened secret entrancesm, and a few that worked the coffee machine).
The Knight entered surveying the lay of the lair as though he owned it. His Squire went quickly. With a click of a button, he had fallen into a pit of Asps. Fantasy snickers darkly as the good squire suffers from the venom, but sighs sadly thinking that he should have dropped him in the Basalisk pit. Of course, the knight mourns the death and promises to slay me in his honour. Laughable.
The Knight made it past the first floor, which had the rotating blades of death. The second had a golem, which he quickly laid to waste. Fantasy didn\'t mind he still had 13 more floors to go. The third, which held a puzzle, the knight solved (To see puzzle read the bottom). Fourth, was an angry goul, but the knight had holy water. Things get worse from here.
The knight passed from floor to floor. Passing my best traps and beasts. My guillotine missed by a hair, Medusa cast her eyes away at his glory, The rolling boulder fell short. One by one. My attempts were thwarted. Until he was at my Chamber door. This was his final calling.
The Knight burst through looking arrogantly at me. \"Your days are over Fantasy!\". Calmly I sighed and looked at him through blood shot eyes and said \"Yes you win. The Princess is yours. My best traps were all for naught. If only I knew your power\". Then with a click of a button, the door to the princesses cage swung open. The knight rushed in to her aide. Wrong move. With a seecond click the cage door slammed shut. Two birds, one stone. I wonder if the knight would seek a bonus.
So, the princess is still in my clutches. The Knight had long since been thrown to the hell hounds, and their heads hung on my mantle. The King paid the ransom and the princess was escorted back to the castle. I waved benignly to her from my tower. I wasn\'t worried. She would be back soon, and I had the money for betteer traps this time around. Life was sweet.