*sigh* A few ground rules:
1. I will not be kissed by anyone or anything for any reason, unless they are hot.
2. I do not own, nor will I ever own, a pot, sack or crock of gold, and if I did I would not relinquish it to anyone on the grounds that they 'catch' me.
3. I will not pose for a greeting card, tattoo, sticker, graphic or any other design.
4. The O' in my name does not give me fairy powers. I can not cure your diseases, rashes or infections, so do not stick them in my face.
5. I respond to other greetings besides "Top o' tha morning to ye me lad", and if I ignore said greeting it does not mean I'm too drunk to understand and that you should say it slower and louder.
6. I can not be held responsible for any wishes I grant that do not - after some testing - appear to have come true. This especially applies to wishes of immortality.
7. I do not live in a forest. This means a) I can not be used as an example in an environmentalism campaign, and b) I can't speak to squirrels.
8. The fact that I am not wearing green does not mean I have been exiled from my community for wanton vandalism.
9. The fact that I am not wearing green does not mean I vomited on all my other clothes.
10. Any sentence containing the words 'Lucky Charms' should not be spoken in my vicinity.
That is all.
