[[I am not going to apologize for not posting in a long time. As some of you know already, Xillix snagged me up right after my vacation for one of his Settings sweatshops, and as such, I have been busy writing events, things, and secret stuff you will find out about soon™. I still intend on finishing this, but it may take a bit more time than intended. Have fun, and play the game while you wait.]]
EXTERIOR: OJAVEDA IN FRONT OF THE BROKEN DOOR.
The camera pans sideways as it follows our heroes…
Farren: See! I AM a hero.
…
I’ll try not to do that again. The camera follows our companions as they walk down the nearly empty streets. In twenty years, I will come back to write in a bunch of poorly made and unnecessary NPCs to ‘fill’ the scene. Anyways, three PL-troopers stop them.
PL-trooper: We are looking for some guys with bots to pawn. How long have you had these?
Farren: I just got them yesterday. They are taking me on a quest to defeat the…
steuben kicks Farren in the leg to stop him: forgive the boy. he is a bit of a simpleton. WoW player. we have had these bots since MB. you can get a quest from them if you like.
PL-trooper: No thank you. I like my sanity. Identify yourself.
Farren: I am F…
Jayose smacks Farren across the back of the head.
Farren: Would you knock it off! Shesh. I am not going to lie to the man.
stueben raises an eyebrow with a thoughtful expression: very well. tell him your story.
Farren: Finaly! Some respect. This is how it goes. *strikes his best storytelling pose* I, the simple nephew of a carrot farmer, am actually the son of a great and powerful warrior! I was chosen by destiny and the gods to rise from the ashes of my destroyed home and rest swift vengeance upon the Dark Empire and all it stands for! These two bots will guide myself and my powerful mentor to… what are you laughing about?
The three PL-troopers are rolling on the ground LOLing by now. One stops long enough to wave them past: Go ahead ‘hero’ LOL! You are not the noobs we are looking for. xD
Farren: But…
PL-trooper: Dude, get out of here before I PK you.
stueben motions everyone forward and they continue on.
EXTERIOR: OJA… A LITTLE CLOSER TO THE TAVERN
The Broken Door looms before our fellows. Farren has the oddest look on his face, and does not even have a pose for it.
Jayose: Well, if I may say it, dumbfounded confusion is very hard to make into a heroic pose. Even for sir Farren.
Farren: I don’t understand it. Those were the DE’s best troops. They should have just jumped on us, and then we could have had an awesome fight scene where I would win, of course. We did they let us go.
steuben: one never knows the ways of the weak minded, just how to manipulate them. come, we have to find a swashbucking main character here to lead us to hydlaa.
Farren: Weak minded? What is that supposed to mean?
steuben waves his hand in front of Farren: you do not need to know that.
iKtomi beeps and whistles.
Jayose: I must agree with the twerp. We don’t really have time for this.
Farren: I guess you are right. Are you sure we will find who we need here?
stueben: you always find main characters in taverns, did you not know this? strider in lord of the rings, trinity in the matrix, han solo in starwars. that is just the way it is, young one. watch yourself. the roleplaying can get pretty rough in these taverns.
Farren: I can handle myself in a roleplay.
Farren strides into the tavern without a worry in his eye as wind blows his hair back from his determined face.
Jayose: Come on runt. Even you won’t want to miss this.
iKtomy: *beep* *beep* off-on-on-on-off-off.
INTERIOR: THE BROKEN DOOR
Farren and the bots follow steuben in the doorway. It is filled with every sort of villainous scoundrels, cutthroats, dirty rats, and rogues. There are a few NPCs with the players as well. Farren sidles up to the bar in his best sidling up to the bar pose.
Jayose: They have those?
Farren: Page 392, drawing B3. ‘How to heroically sidle up to a bar in a tavern filled with sort of villainous scoundrels, cutthroats, dirty rats, and rogues.’ Right here.
Farren points to the page in his book.
iKtomi:
http://qdb.ps-mc.com/?671Brado: Sorry sirs. No Links in here. They are banned.
steuben: ah. you have to love inside jokes.
Jayose: Fine, we will go outside. We don’t need any ‘real’ people to have fun anyways. Come one iKtomi, let’s show them how bots have fun.
iKtome follows Jayose out the door, looking worried. Farren shrugs and turns back to the bar to fine steuben missing. The old man seems to have wandered off to talk with a tall, hairy, disheveled character in the far corner of unrecognizable race or even gender. stueben nods to the beast as they talk. Ferran turns to join him, but is stopped by two ugly rogue-ish characters.
Pkerrulez: ipawnzu anUrma2!
Farren: I didn’t understand. Could you please rephrase it? …Did I just say that?
Farren turns back to the bar in shock, but the other player grabs his arm.
Lorddume Thegreat: He said… I don’t actually know what he said. But we don’t like roleplayers.
Farren: How do you know I am a roleplayer?
Lorddume: Your description is longer than the last book I read, and it says I can easily defeat you. You better watch out. We’ve been banned from ten other games for kicking wimps like you all over the place.
Farren: Fine. I’ll just stay out of your way.
Pkerrulez: nO1one!! urWl bE loOtz!
Farren: What?
Lorddume: Um…again I don’t know. He was a Chinese gold farmer in WoW before we got banned. Never did understand him. But we are just going to kill you anyways.
Pkerrulez challenges Farren to a dual. steuben accepts.
Pkerrulez: wut?
With astounding speed, steuben slashes out with a Cylsaber that is suddenly in his hands.
Cylsaber: Whoosh, whoosh, fizzle zap, slice.
Pkerrulez has been killed by steuben. Lorddume takes one look at steuben and runs out the door. stueben makes the Cylsaber vanish back into its tube.
Muffled Cylsaber: I hate you.
steuben points to the tall hairy creature: This is Dreybacca. He is the supporting and sometimes amusing character who will lead us to our main supporting handsome and dashing character who is intended to draw in the female 18 to 24 demographic, and will take us mostly safely to Kada-El‘s.
Farren: Say again?
steuben: he is going to help you be a hero.
Farren strikes a pose: That is all I needed to know.
