Think NPCs are dumb? Click here!

[Jeraphon]

She doesn't understand how anyone could not want to buy fish.

One that was bugging me earlier was that I needed to get ink and paper from Jayose for a quest. So I ask for the paper, and he says it will cost 50 tiras. I hand him an octa and I get an error saying that Jayose does not want this. I guess he doesn't want to do business with me.

not that this is related to this thread at all, but there is a bug that jayose will only take 50 TRIAS not an octa or anything else for this transaction.

Until that matter is fixed, please use the free moneychanger. And I'll try to look into that. (I haven't been around much lately. I know.)

[Parallo]

Terea Lohdren asks you if you would mind doing something for her. If you answer yes, as in yes I would mind doing something for you, she gives you the quest. Tiny, matter but would help make the quests seem more unique rather than typing the same thing at the beginning of every one.

[LigH]

I believe this "Do you mind?" - "Yes" issue was even a bug report (maybe wish) already... at least I raised this topic elsewhere before.

[khoridor]

Hi. I use (U) for unanswered questions, (A) for answered questions, (I) for improperly answered questions.

This is a bit of Levrus' chat. I hope more than 10 is ok.

Being polite:
U   are you Levrus?
U   are you all right?
A   how do you do?
U   how is your wife?
A   are you married?
U   do you have children?
U   who is your father?
U   about your family?

Magic:
U   are you a wizard?
U   are you a mage?
U   about wizards
U   about mages
U   about mana
U   can you enchant rings?
I   can you enchant weapons? (A weapon is the best way to defend yourself ... blah blah)
U   about formulas / spell formulas
I   about combining glyphs (Have glyphs?  Yes...)

Familiars:
I   do you have a pet? (Give you what? You'll have to be more specific.)
I   do you have a familiar? (Give you what? ...)

Alchemy:
U   are you an alchemist?
A   about alchemy
U   about healing
A   I need healing
U   I need healing potions
U   I need potions / a potion
U   about ingredients

Things:
U   about sacks
U   about glyph sacks
U   about crystals
I   about the crystal (Crystals are normally food for Krans....)
U   about rings

Training:
A   do you teach?
U   can you teach?
A   can you teach me?
U   do you teach magic?
U   do you teach alchemy?
U   do you know other teachers/trainers?
U   who teaches/trains magic?

Things seen in his tower:
U   about your shop/tower
U   about [your] statue
U   about [the] [giant] snake(s)
U   about Raithen
U   who is Raithen?
U   do you know Raithen?
U   what is a groffel / yulbar?
U   about groffel / yulbar
U   about barrel(s)
U   about mixing / mixing station
U   about [the] oven

[Rizin]

Terea Lohdren asks you if you would mind doing something for her. If you answer yes, as in yes I would mind doing something for you, she gives you the quest. Tiny, matter but would help make the quests seem more unique rather than typing the same thing at the beginning of every one.

There are a few of these that exist (RE: Do you mind?). We have fixed them as they are pointed out, so if you see one please submit a bug report and we'll take care of it. Thanks!

On the other topic, you can ask them a few different things to start a quest, not just the standard line.

Hi. I use (U) for unanswered questions, (A) for answered questions, (I) for improperly answered questions.

This is a bit of Levrus' chat. I hope more than 10 is ok.

Being polite:
U   are you Levrus?
U   are you all right?

[...cut for length...]

Thank you for the organized list. We will take a look through it and see what we can add in.

[khoridor]

A few more, then, with Boralis, while they are fresh. Still (U) for unanswered, (A) for answered and (I) for improperly.

Family:
A   who is Rinna? (Ahh, Rinna, my beautiful mate....)
I   are you married? (That's my own business, thank you).
A   how are you?
A   how is Rinna?
U   how is your wife?
U   do you have children/kids?
U   your wife is pretty
U   Rinna is pretty

Things around him:
U   what's in the chest?
U   about the chest
U   is this chest yours?
U   about large chest
U   about crates
U   about wooden crates

[Rizin]

A few more, then, with Boralis, while they are fresh. Still (U) for unanswered, (A) for answered and (I) for improperly.

...

*Rizin adds them to the list and realizes she needs more post-its.

[Caarrie]

* Caarrie hands Rizin some 8 1/2 x 11 sheets of paper

[Rizin]

*Rizin stares blankly at the paper, "What's this....?" She flips the paper over and looks confused. "No stick?"

*Rizin, armed with scissors and that paste-glue, sits diligently cutting the paper into small squares and applying glue to the back upper edge. "Now...what was that about the NPC's being dumb?"

*Rizin smiles triumphantly and adds her new post-its to the wall, "Thanks Caarrie!"

[khoridor]

This is Taulim, lost in his childhood memories.

U   what are you doing?
I   what do you do? (He then tells his name and past life)
I   what is your job? (same answer as above)
U   where do you come from?
U   where is homestead / your village?
A   about homestead

Guarding
U   what is your duty?
U   why are you here?
U   who is your boss?
U   who do you obey to?
U   who is in charge here?
U   what is your rank?
U   is this area safe?
U   I have a crime to report
U   I need help

Buildings:
U   about / what is / where is the court hall?
I   about barracks (he talks about other barracks, not the ones behind him)
U   where is the prison / jail?
U   about prison / jail

[Rizin]

*Rizin wonders if Khoridor is old enough to apply to settings.

Edit: To fix typo.

[khoridor]

Khoridor is very old, and considering (as contributor).

Taria Prestis is very, very hard to reach (and even to notice, for a dwarf)

A   who are you?
I   are you married? (she just said she was)
A   about your husband (My husband Barl...)
U   about Barl
I   what do you do?
I   what is your job?
U   what's your name?
A   about you
A   who / where is your husband?
A   how are you?
I   how is your husband?

Expnading what she said:
U   what are you looking at?
U   what do you see?
U   what are you doing?
U   about labyrinths / stone labyrinths / stone labyrinth
A   about labyrinth (same as everybody here: they always mention it on plural, but expect questions without the 's')
A   about bronze doors
U   about gardens / garden
U   about balcony
U   about [the] view
A   about temple
A   about tower
A   about Plaza
U   about fountain
U   about statue
U   about this house

Just for fun:
U   can/do you cook?

[Volund]

How about if If I bribe a hydlaa guard to kick some guys rear end around, that would be RP, entertaining and rather easy to understand for the NPC? "If I pay you money will you beat that guy up?"

Of course this is simply a joke...then again you could put it into action 

[LigH]

Even our Octarch, Iragdun Medio Salikarios, tells me about the dungeon:

A dungeon, eh?  I don't think you'll find anything like that around here.  The city officials have denied the existence of any such structure underneath our streets.  Why would they lie?

Well, I believe as the leader of "the city officials", he should know best, eh? -- I think he deserves a slightly different reply. Not one random out of the usual pool.

Someone must remember Crosh Dunehammer...

[Prolix]

I am not certain that the hole beneath the temple really qualifies as a dungeon myself.

A close, dark prison, commonly, under ground, as if the lower apartments of the donjon or keep of a castle, these being used as prisons.

There are no cells present there. If there is a dungeon it hasn't been implemented yet. Perhaps it is under the courthouse or guardroom or even beneath the Octarch's offices. The closest thing I have seen is the lower level of the Arena.