List of anoying Sci-fi/Horror movie Cliches

[Gimlich]

Hey I was watching a bunch of old cheesy sci-fi shows with my buddies a few days ago and we started coming up with this list of movie cliche rules that seem to appear in every popular sci-fi or horror show.

1. Seize them!

Its against the law for an authoritarian figure to capture, pick up or grab something. It must always be Seized!

2. Doors

Its against the law for someone above the height of 5ft9 to open doors using the traditional knob turning method. They must always be kicked down or blown to pieces.

3. Hello?

When one of the characters in a horror movie hears a mysterious noise, regardless of what that noise is, they must always shout out "Hello?" expecting someone to reply.

4. Splitting up

"Lets split up!" nuff said

5. No breaks?

When the protagonist is driving down the road it is against the law of movie cliches for him to use the breaks to avoid anything on the road. If something jumps out in front of him the standard procedure is to grab the wheel and twirl it around continuously until the car rolls of into the ditch and crashes.

6. Finding the cat

If there is a murderer, alien or demon lurking in your general area, the first thing you must do is travel into the basement and find the cat using a match to guide your way.

Thats all I can think of now without actually finding our list. If you have any others feel free to contribute

[LigH]

Well...

Watch "Shriek" or the "Scary Movie" series, and you get all the clichees presented.

And: Don't think you are the first one collecting such a list. Others have been far more complete...

http://www.findcliches.com/horrormovie.htm

[Phinehas]

That's right Ligh, crush his insignificant attempt at creativity beneath the superiority of your links! That's what I like to see.

[LigH]

Phinehas: Your superior intellect revealed even more destructive purpose in my reply than I put in.

 

Gimlich: You tell me if my reply hurt you.

[Lolitra, Celorrim Purrty Twins]

hmm

Mwhaha ha ha mwhaha haaaa haaa....

Enough said...

[bilbous]

The cutest critters are always the deadliest??

[steuben]

though this tends to be a cliche of fantasy as well...

the uber hot villianess.

[Under the moon]

10. Fire in the hold!

All baddies must be killed by fire or explosives in the end of the movie.

11. Two left feet.

All victims must trip while running away. Under no circumstances shall the evildoer trip on the same roots.

12. No enter.

The first door you check when running away must always be locked. If it opens, please close and lock it and pretend it was locked.

13. Hide and seek.

The closet is always the best place to hide. It is far easier for the monster to find you.

14. Here’s your chance.

Evildoers must always pause just long enough for the good guy to kill them in the end (see method in #10). It is the least they can do in exchange for all the victims making themselves easy to find in closets.

15. Don’t hate me because I’m beautiful.

Monsters shall only go after groups of ‘pretty’ people. Ugly people have enough problems without monsters being after them.

16. I knew we should have gone to Disneyland.

If you are on vacation, it is mandatory that monsters or bad guys eat the poorest actors first.

16b. Who needs tents?

Under International law, all cabins must be equipped with at least one monster or homicidal maniac.

16c. Where’s the map?

The best way to avoid cabin fees is to get lost and attacked before you get there. That’s being thrifty.

16d. Wing and a prayer.

If flying, make sure you crash where there will only be two members of your party left by the time rescue workers find you. A good ratio is 6 hours for every 1 member. The pilot does not count, as he has to die in the crash.

[Knarls]

Black guy always dies
As utm implied, the pretty ones always die
The drunk/stoner always dies
The average chick, and the nerd, will live - or in some cases just the nerd.


The killer in all horror movies uses blades. Despite a gun being much more efficient... A knife is just scarier.

[Rizin]

When being chased and presented with stairs as an option, the stairs must always be taken...even if running out the front door, or any other option really, would guarantee survival.

[ThomPhoenix]

The black guy in that genetically-manipulated shark movie doesn't die

[SerqFeht]

You are a good looking girl in the woods. It is night. Suddenly, you hear a twig snap. You call out "Hellooooo?" But no one answers. then the slasher jumps out. He is big, maybe deformed, and holding a large axe (or chainsaw, or knife, or cleaver). You run, screaming for help. You run faster than the big muscular slasher, and trip a few times, but manage to keep just ahead of him. You see an abondoned farm house. You run in and hide on the 2nd floor bedroom closet. You see the slasher's shadow move by, then leave the room into the hall. You ponder on running while you have the chance. But you hesitate. Then the slasher comes back to the door, and starts chopping it down. WHACK! WHACK! WHACK! And he's big, and strong, and swinging the axe!





So you take the gun from your purse and shoot him. Credits roll.


After credits stop rolling, 3 more slashers run into the farm house while you scream shrillly.

[Knarls]

The black guy in that genetically-manipulated shark movie doesn't die

Deep blue sea?... Well I guess somebody had to be different.

He dies in the second one 

[ThomPhoenix]

If terrorists or criminals take hostages in a restaurant, someone on the kitchen staff always happens to be an ex-Navy SEAL.

[LigH]

Aliens have body fluids which can dissolve all available materials on earth. Only the alien itself is resistant.

Your best friends form your childhood are your worst nightmare in horror movies (pets, dolls).

The technician opens the locked door right after the last trapped victim died. But he finally does.

The budget for the special effects is inverse proportional to the budget for cast and plot.

Evil creatures don't feel pain - on the contrary, they even love to self-mutilate.

A scientific explanation of the reason for dead people walking is too hillarious to even listen to it.

The easiest way to destroy an artifical intelligence is a logic conflict. No matter how flimsy it sounds to the audience.

-----

And regarding the most current movie, "Cloverfield":

The core of horror is the fear, not the enemy.