The New Inquisition[Cancelled]

[A_Traveller]

In the woods north of Hydlaa lies a sprawling caravan city, home of the little known mercenary army known as 'The Inquisition'.

(A rare moment... The entire Inquisition stand with their heads hung in sorry. They're general Gabrien is dead. His funeral pyre blazes bright and high as the Inquisitions Military band plays a sad melody. A young Dwarf stands at a distance with a wicked grin on his face. He is draped in fine silks and covered in jewels. He has a false white eye in his left eye socket. The death of Gabrien means he is destined to replace him as general. He smiles a large sinister smirk. A young Dermorian, still fresh and untainted by the inquisitions hard lifestyle stands walks up and stands next to the bulky dwarf.)

Dermorian: So... Olriech... does this mean you'll become a general... your next in line aren't you?

Olreich: Aye... it dew ladde, Oi aam endeed... thees'll mean a neu starrt to the Inkwesition!

(Olreich strides slowly away, a large grin on his face.)

[Raa]

[Lolz, what's with the dwarf's accent?  ]

[Donari Tyndale]

[RL references -> FAIL. Seriously, that isn't really creative. I'm sure you can do better.]

[A_Traveller]

[RL references -> FAIL. Seriously, that isn't really creative. I'm sure you can do better.]

[WTF!?! what RL referance? Wtf? !!! If you mean because of the title Inquisition, that word just means forcible questioning, and because the catholic church had a section called the inquisition doesn't make it specifically RL, it is also used in Warhammer and a few RPG's out there(none of which are set in RL), it isn't the most creative but it's better then something like "The Band Of_____" or "The Knights of_____". I am sorry normally I like criticism because it helps me better my RP but your is the only bad feedback I've had regarding it's creativity... I completely disagree and wanna know why you think it is not creative?]

[Donari Tyndale]

[It is none better then these guilds you mentioned. I don't approve of them as well . By the way, these RPGs took the catholic Inquisition as an idol for theirs. Furthermore, infamous mercenary armies belong into the same category as massacred villages, evil demons and undiscovered kingdoms. It's easy to think up those, and often out of settings. If you choose these, you stumble upon sensitive territory. It's easy to mess up. Good roleplay isn't marked by ultra strong foes and a big conflict, but by the behaviour of the individual characters. What about a band of outlaws? "Infamous" implies other people know about your mercenary army, however, this is not the case. You could slowly introduce your mercenary band to Yliakum, however, you need to be open for any attempts to destroy that band, as the Octarchy isn't exactly a group of thumb sucking hippies. If I were you, I'd tone down your roleplay a bit and start with something small which eventually leads to your mercenary army. People often like that more than "Bam, my mercenary army is here now.".
P.S.
It's easy to come up with big things. The quality however lies in the small details ]

[Farren Kutter]

[[Oh? How do you know this mercenary band is not infamous where it comes from? Besides, my character(s) has/have heard of them, some of them anyways. I have way too many charries for -all- of them to have heard of them . A mercenary 'army' can be anything from a platoon of men to a few battalions. A platoon would not be unrealistic, maybe two or three even, as a platoon is generally not all that much. Most mercenary 'armies' are generally around that size, because it is hard to manage anything much bigger with a band of greedy killers ]]

[Donari Tyndale]

[Then the term army is more then misleading, and I doubt that your definition was A_Wanderer's intention . The mercenary band comes from Yliakum, and there it is hardly known. Forcing knowledge upon other characters is godmodding, btw. But let's stay positive! A_Wanderer, it is good to see you creating a roleplay event for others to take part in. Good job  , however, you can still improve it.]

[Farren Kutter]

[[Yes, and we are on but one level of Yliakum, and supposedly contact with other level is rare if not impossible, as we hardly hear about ANY of that. No one 'knew' of the kran city either until it was added.]]

[Zan]

(That is the difference between claiming something exists and creating it.

Player claims that are not in line with settings have no basis of truth, they are not creations. You can claim them but they'll only work if everyone agrees with your claims. Settings creates and has the authority to do so. What they claim, happens. Players can create too but it takes time to convince the community and gather the in-game power/influence/reputations.

Players should try to create intricate plots, famous characters and all that from scratch ... not just claim they exist and demand that everyone agrees.)

[Farren Kutter]

[[That isn't what I meant >.< I meant that they could be from some other part of yliakum, how're we to say they're not (in)famous there? Or maybe (in)famous within certain circles?]]

[Donari Tyndale]

[Yliakum isn't that big. Well, it is, but not too big. Settings is to decide if there's something alike out there, and not players.]

[Zan]

(You can say all you want, Farren and nobody can deny or confirm .. but it doesn't make them any more real. Why not pick a real group that already exists, or create one and create your infamous reputation?)

[Farren Kutter]

[[If someone says they're infamous, how does it harm you? You can choose whether or not you've heard of them before, that is your choice. Building a reputation in PS can be a pain in the butt (I know, I've been trying to build one for the Rangers for three years and still haven't succeeded beyond certain, rather small circles) so why not proclaim the guild as famous or infamous and allow people to decide whether they've heard of it? Famous doesn't mean EVERYONE knows. I mean, take the war of 1812 for example, an American-British war. Most people (even in America) have never heard of it, however it is the war in which the American national anthem was written by Francis Scott Key, originally a poem. So many people don't know of it, even though it is famous.]]

[Zan]

(It doesn't harm me that there is something famous or infamous .. it harms me that there is an army out there that doesn't exist.

Do you think people will like it if the Dark Empire claims to have a massive army, somewhere on a lower level, waiting to be unleashed on it's enemies? I'll bet you that many will start picking fights with the DE, just to disprove their claims. The same problem will occur here. You can claim to be a big general but with no actual army to back your claims up, nobody will have to treat you like one.

Claims without backing lead to frustration eventually, I've seen it plenty.)

[Farren Kutter]

[[Were you not listening to what I said about mercenary armies? They tend to be -small- And anyways, this is all VERY off topic, criticize the guild in their guild thread, not in an IG RP thread ]]