Excellent! And for those of you who can't get enough. here's version two of the same event!
Wake Up and Smell the Charmflowers- More Victims of the Puppeteer of Flames.
{The following is an honest to Talad truth of what happened one night not long ago at the Stonehead Tavern. The names have not been changes, since there are no innocents…}
Roled arrives at the Stonehead Tavern, in the hopes of some pie before making the ride back to his homestead with Lattia. He sees a bright red Ywnwnn sitting with the fenki Mariana at one table, and on the other table, a beautiful and lush display of dozens of charmflowers. Roled bows to the fellow, saying “Hello sir”
Gavaro nods, "Evening"
Roled looks around hopefully. "Be there an innkeeper her tonight do ye know?" The red fellow replies, shaking his head slowly, "I do not." The Dermorian elf sees the pile of flowers on the table and takes a deep whiff, smiling. Mariana raises her head from her arms, peering bleary-eyed around the tavern. Her gaze lands on Roled, and her hackles rise slightly before she realizes who the elf is. Politely, she says, "Could you sheath those?"
Roled rubs his nose "Ah! miss Mariana! Of course, sorry!" Roled tries to put his swords away and misses his pack twice.
The fellow (whose name is Gavaro but who has not yet said his name aloud,) says to Mariana, "You look tired." Mariana relaxes slightly, turning to look at Gavaro as he approaches. "I'm afraid that is because I am," she replies. She gives Roled an appreciative, if fleeting, smile. Gavaro nods understandingly, "And why is that?" he says.
Roled smells the flowers again "I h’aint ne’er smelled charmflowers that be so.. so.. enticing!" The elf turns toward Marianna, and comments, smiling “ Lady- ye looks beautiful tonight!” Gavaro raises an eyebrow at the elf, who replies to his eyebrows, saying “And ye sir, master Muscles, may I know yer name?” Roled winks at the man "Feel free to take those tight pants off if they be not comfortable sir..."
Mariana slowly looks at Roled. She blinks at him. "I....uh....thanks," she says, before rubbing at her nose. She glances at Gavaro. "Haven't been sleeping well." The elf starts to sway to some unheard music, and sings “Sleep! ah sleep before one's lover comes home, or after, but not during!”
Gavaro shakes his head and looks back to Mariana, "Interesting... Keeping one eye open at all times?"
Mariana chokes slightly at Roled's implication and then covers her face with her paws to hide the either horrified or embarrassed expression. Words muted, she says to Gavaro, "No, more like unsavory dreams." Roled grins at Mariana "Ye just needs someone to sleep beside ye, make ye too tired to stay awake!" Mariana cringes. "Thanks, but I'll pass. Permanently."
Gavaro frowns, "I wish I could help you." He looks over to the elf, who murmurs, still swaying, “Wish we had us some pie... some meringue - to lick off our fingers!”
Mariana quirks a brow slowly. "Are you feeling quite alright Roled? You seem a bit...off. You know, even for uh...for you." Gavaro chuckles at Mari's comment. The elf looks to the ywnwnn, and says coyly, “What is yer name sir, oh my, look at those biceps!”
Mariana glances back at Gavaro. "Uh," she says, struggling to help the man out. "I don't think that he's...well, that kind of a guy, Roled," she hints, helplessly. Roled responds, “Lady Marianna? A bit what? Hungry? aye I be ...sooo hungry fer ... oh, I don't know..."
Mariana blinks. "I have some dried meat in my travelsack," she offers uncertainly. Gavaro starts, "Its..." he pauses a moment and looks to Mariana, then back to the elf. At this moment a young Dermorian woman comes tentatively into the Stonehead Tavern.
“Hello miss lady Dermorian with the lovely red hair!” Roled says dreamily to her. The lady (whose name is Qorla but we don’t know that yet) sees the flowers on the table, and takes a whiff of the charmflowers. Qorla smiles to those gathered about the table. "Hello!"
Out of nowhere, Roled says “Would ye like to dance, Mariana?” Mariana gulps. "I uh...no, thank you, I really don't dance. Maybe you should ask this newcomer here?" She gestures to Qorla hopefully.
Qorla blushes. "Dance? Me?"
Roled bows deeply to Mariana and reaches out his hand anyway... then changes direction and holds out a hand to the Dermorian woman. “Lady Miss, would ye care to dance?” Qorla uncertainly looks away. "Oh, I don't know how to dance, I'm afraid..." Roled holds out his hand to her smiling. Qorla hesitates. "Hmmm." She takes his hand.
Mariana smirks faintly and mutters something about asking Gavaro to dance, before inspecting the man carefully, head tilted to the side, trying to figure something out. Gavaro looks to Mariana with an astonished look. Mariana laughs softly. Roled takes the lady elf’s hand and gently turns it over, kissing her palm. Qorla blushes even more. "Oh, don't..." Roled wraps his arms around her waist and pulls her close "Tis easy, just follow me!" he says, and twirls her around. Qorla dances surprisingly well for a beginner.
Gavaro shakes his head quick and almost unnoticeably.
Mariana grunts and slowly slides her head back down into her arms. She covers it with her paws. Roled dips the Dermorian, then kisses her neck, licking up to her ear. Qorla pushes Roled away. "Hey!" Roled stumbles backwards "hey ! hey! ho! ho!"
Gavaro sighs, "So what kinds of dreams are these?" Mariana jumps slightly, her head coming back up again. She narrows her eyes at the couple, trying to discern distress in the woman's voice. "Nightmares," she says. "You know, lovely ones about having my arm ripped off repeatedly." She begins to massage it subconsciously and shakes her head.
Roled dances out of control over to the Ywnwnn. Qorla wipes her neck but does not seem too bothered. To the seated ones, she asks, "Is he alright?" Gavaro looks over his shoulder to Qorla and shakes his head. Roled wavers on his feet about to fall into the ywnwnn."Ye be soooo.... red! sir... um!" He totters about to fall. Mariana shrugs stiffly. "Honestly I don't know Roled all that well...but he's acting weird. You know, even for him. I think he's been drugged somehow, I..." Her eyes fall to the flowers on the table, and narrow sharply.
“Drugged? Nae nae I don't take drugs” the elf sings.
Qorla gives Roled a concerned look. "Hmm... Strange." She follows Mariana's gaze. "Those are quite lovely. My favorite flower."
“But lady Dermorian, ye looks like the most beautiful blossom I have e'er seen!”
Mariana snorts. "Taya was having issues with a charm flower in the Den the other day. Made strange comments about it, wouldn't stop talking about it." She approaches the table, spreads her fingers, and begins burning the petals one by one. Roled sees her beginning to burn the flowers"NO!!!!!!" he shrieks.
Qorla steps back, away from the flowers. "Settle down, sir."
“Lady Mariana What are ye DOING!!!!” The greasy elfboy tries to block her fire. Mariana plants her feet stubbornly on the floor, though she flinches instinctively as Roled gets closer to her. Focusing on the flaming charm flowers, she continues sending heat into the petals, until they all shimmer with the blaze.
“No! not the lovely lovely flowers!” Roled sobs uncontrollably.
Just at this moment, the Stonehammer Ardoin steps into the Tavern, "Right then Zalya, I'll have a-" The dwarf blinks, then looks at Mariana, then Roled. He looks back to Mariana as Roled talks about flowers. Roled grabs for the flowers and jumps back his hands burning "OWWWWWW!"
Mariana dusts her paws and looks over at the weeping elf. "Sit," she says sharply. She advances towards the elf, meaning to grab him around the waist and pull him forcibly away from the table. To elude her, Roled falls to the floor and crawls towards Ardoin. “Help! help! Sir Ardoin! Help! SAVE THE FLOWERS”
The dwarf jumps back and cries out, “Roled! What th' bloody death realm are ya doin'!?”
Qorla watches with apparent surprise, her mouth open. Ardoin offers Roled a hand. The elf grabs Ardoin’s hand and cries into it, "The flowers! The flowers! SAVE THEM Ardoin! Take them and run! Keep them from this KILLER!” Roled glares at Mariana, his eyes overflowing with tears.
Mariana sighs tiredly. She glances over at the ashy remains and then instantly makes sure that the remaining embers die as well. "He's drugged," she says. "He'll need to recover...Roled, let me see your hand." The fenki moves closer and stoops to one knee.
Roled screams “NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!” Mariana reaches up with a paw, and tries to slap Roled across the face. Roled tries to crawl into Ardoin's arms, who reacts with disgust, saying “Bloody death realm, yer worse then those treehuggers I met th' other d-“
Qorla stares at the flowers' ashes. "How... how is he drugged? Did he eat a flower?" The Ywnwnn answers her, “Sniffed them.” Roled starts licking the ashes on the floor.
Qorla clasps a hand to her mouth. Her eyes wide, she exclaims, "I sniffed them! I couldn't... I couldn't help it!"
The Stonehammer looks at Roled with a look of "What the heck are you doing there!?" He holds Roled in his arms much like he would a child, trying to pull him away from the ashes on the ground, "Er, bad Roled, no!"
Mariana jerks her paw back in disgust. "Damn," she says. "He's worse than Taya was, way way worse." She moves to grab a fistful of Roled's hair and tries to yank his head up with it. "Don't worry," she says to Qorla, "It doesn't seem to last long." Roled gets dragged away from Ardoin by Mariana holding his hair in her fist. Roled pleads, "Save me! Ardoin! Kiss me before I die!" The happily married elf (but they don’t know that) puckers up trying to kiss the Stonehammer.
“Roled, I'm not interested in a relationship like that. You of all folks should know I like lassies ta kiss, no-“ Mariana rolls her eyes. "Here," she says. "Kiss this." She balls her paw into a fist and swings. Ardoin is kissed while trying to speak. He barely lets it last as he pushes Roled away.
Qorla , frightened by Roled's reaction to the flowers, gradually makes her way to the Stonehead's entrance. "..I... I should go." Ardoin, realizes his chances of making a good first impression with the cute Dermorian lassie, says, “Nay, lassy!” He wipes his mouth, muttering “Brave it. I feel violated, very much so violated. But I'm tryin' ta hide my fear...”
Roled cries “Ardoin! Save the Dermorian lady before she gets away!” Mariana continues pulling rather meanly on Roled's hair, her blow missing. She moves to yank him up onto a stone bench. "She's not in danger, you dunderhead," she snaps.
Ardoin says, “Gods, I've faced th' undead afore', but this is th' scariest day of ma life...”
From the end of Mariana’s fist, the elf implores his friend, “Quick kiss her Ardoin!”
Ardoin says: “Roled, Roled... Shut up.”
Qorla stands still with fright, her hands over her mouth. Mariana fumblingly loses her grip and swears vehemently. Roled twists his head as far as he can and tries to bite Mariana. Ardoin covers his face with his right hand for a moment, "Bloody..." Mariana jerks her paw away from the crazy elf's jaw, glares, and then aims a kick at his chest. Roled catches her kick in his chest and reels backwards right toward the Dermorian lady at the doorway. Ardoin cries out “I feel so violated. Worse then th' time Eso tried ta make azure women come after me. An' that was bad.” Qorla cannot seem to be able to stand the violence, and so begins to run away. However, Roled tumbles right into her. She falls to the ground with a shriek. Roled throws his arms out to catch his fall, right toward the Dermorian. Mariana plants her foot back on the ground and continues to glare. "Fine," she says. "Come down out of your stupor on your own. Just try to avoid your animalistic urges." The fenki turns in a huff and reclaims her seat on the stone bench. Roled falls on top of the Dermorian, and goes to kiss her, pinning her shoulders to the floor
Ardoin ejaculates in amazement, “P-public affection?”
Qorla squirms spastically. "Gods, no!"
Roled says: “Goddess YES! YES YES!!!!”
Ardoin's hands ball up into fists, and he tries to punch Roled in the back of the head. Mariana narrows her eyes sharply. She growls furiously at Roled, something utterly gutteral about the sound. Qorla is kissed, and she really does not like it. Roled catches Ardoin's punch on his cheek as he turns. It sends him reeling towards the Ywnwnn again. Mariana returns her attention to Gavaro. "Kill me now."
Ardoin pleads, “ Lassy, go git some rope.”
Gavaro laughs, "Easier said than done"
Qorla is lying on the ground in a fetal position. She cracks an eye open. With Roled far away, she makes a break for it, holding onto her bag for dear life.
Roled jumps up on the table in front of the Red Muscled Savage, saying, “Mariana if ye weren’t so BEAUTIFUL right now, I would kill ye meself” Suddenly out of nowhere, the Dermorian elf, such a nice guy usually, takes off his armor. "Is it hot in here?" he asks innocently.
Mariana slowly brings her eyes up to look at Roled. Her expression is not lovey dovey. It's feral. "Touch me," she says gratingly, "And I'll set your heart on fire in the most unpleasant way you could possibly imagine." To illustrate her point, flames dance along her forearms.
Ardoin climbs onto the table ever so slowly, trying not to alert Roled. He goes to his right side, not caring if he sees him now. He jumps at Roled. Roled seems distracted by the flames and starts to slowly take his pants off. Mariana stops caring at this point. Coming to her feet, she aims a very hard punch right at the elf's exposed groin.
Roled says: (OW!)
Ardoin sees Roled's groin, and begins to back away, "Bloody..."The Stonehammer curses, “Alright, alright. E's forced my hand. I'll be back in a few minutes.” Ardoin jumps from the table, heading outside of the Stonehead, "When I'm back, I'll ave' supplies ta deal with this."
The demented Dermorian falls off the table right toward the Ywnwn’s lap. Gavaro doesnt move as his body gives way to the elf. Mariana retracts her paw and waves it as though it's been infected by the plague. "Eh," she says disgustedly, and then sets it on fire too, as though hoping that doing so will kill any unsavory hangers-on. Roled balances precariously about to fall into the Ywnwnn and then falls plop toward his lap.
{But apparently Gavaro is not physical, he’s incorporeal. Roled quickly finds this out}
Roled falls to the floor
Mariana mutters, "I'm about ready to toss a bucket of ice water on you, Roled. Drugged or no."
The little elf hits the floor, feet in the air, pants around his ankles, like a turtle on his back. He kicks into the air, stuck. Gavaro sighs. Mariana cranes her neck to watch the Roled-turtle with a small sense of satisfaction.
Ardoin comes back in with a club. "Where is e'?"
Roled writhes on the floor. Mariana points at the floor where the half-naked Roled has landed.
Mariana says: "I think he's been effectively incapacitated."
Roled kicks trying unsuccessfully to get his pants on or off.
Mariana says: "If need be I can repeat the example and make sure he never procreates."
Ardoin gasps, “Cuttin' off is'?
Gavaro nods in the elf direction as if to say, "Hit him any way"
Mariana says: "Of course not, he would bleed to death. That would be unfortunate."
Roled seems to come to his senses for half a second
Ardoin shakes his head, "Right, right..."
Roled looks upside down at Ardoin "Ah! my friend! Ye looks so handsome with yer beard and all!"
Mariana says: "Yyyup. Hit im."
“I wonder what kissing all that beard hair would be like?”
Ardoin says: “Roled. Ye kissed me an'-“
“Oh? Did ye like it Ardoin?” Roled puckers again.
Ardoin aims a whack at Roled's head with the club. Roled catches the blow on the side of his head and he is out cold, his legs dangling in the air, still on his back.
Ardoin says, “ Well. Really, that felt good. I aven't punched someone fer ages! This feels -so- much better.”
Mariana takes a seat. "Good," she says. "Drag him over to the pillows and let him recover his senses then." Ardoin nods at Mariana, and drags Roled to the pillows. "Lady Peckerly, shield yer eyes." The elf is out cold and scrapes along the floor. Mariana rolls her shoulders. "And with that," the fenki says. "I believe I will try to get myself some sleep. Somewhere far, far, far away from..." She looks at Roled disgustedly and points a finger at him. "That. Take care, everyone."
Roled grinds to a stop on the pillows, his butt toward the table. Ardoin grabs for a rolled up rug in the corner, and throws it over Roled.
Sarras walks in and watches everyone for a while with a puzzled expression. "Uh, what? What's going on?"
