Author Topic: The Test of The Jedi  (Read 3120 times)

Jedi

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The Test of The Jedi
« on: September 18, 2003, 03:21:37 pm »
This FanFic is in part a celebration of my race change. I am now a human male, for those of you that don\'t know.

Enjoy :D

The Test of the Jedi

?The utter pointlessness of struggle is only accentuated by the lack of meaning in the cause. People will only fight for what they believe in.? ~ Jedi

Chapter 1

 Jedi dodged as the whistling tip of the blade came slashing at him, it?s brutal slice carving the air where he had moments before stood. He whipped his staff around quickly, twirling it through his fingers, and aimed a blow into the opening left by his opponent?s reckless swing. The man turned his head and the end of the staff flew harmlessly by, brushing his hair.

 The man stumbled back out of Jedi?s range, breathing heavily, and took up a defensive stance, left foot forward, arms straight, sword held at waist level. He shook his head to the side, clearing his long blonde bangs from his eyes. Sweat was pouring down the man?s face, leaving winding rivulets of smooth skin among the dirt. His cold, calculating blue eyes watched Jedi?s every move, searching for a weakness in his defence.

  The man wore a tight white undershirt, having doffed his heavier dress shirt for the battle. The undershirt was cut off at the arms and the thin material was soaked through with his sweat, rendering it more brown than white. Underneath, the man?s muscles were clearly visible. The tails of his shirt were tucked neatly into a pair of baggy, white pants. The pants had no pockets, and, too, were stained from his physical exertion. They tapered down and were folded into smart-looking, black leather boots. His biceps bulged from years of practice with his heavy steel blade. His crop of bright blonde hair was parted down the middle and hung low on either side, emphasizing his keen face. All in all, he struck an imposing figure.

  Jedi, on the other hand, was not so large. His thin, wiry frame belied his physical strength and acrobatic expertise. His hazel brown eyes squinted menacingly from under dark eyebrows. His short, spiked, black hair gleamed in the sun, greased by his sweat. He wore a tight black shirt and loose black pants. His polished black leather boots gleamed when they could be seen under his long, black trench coat. The overcoat was always left unbuttoned, often billowing out in little gusts of wind. This was not of arrogance, but more convenience. Summer was in full force and the days could often get very hot. When left open, not only did it provide him with even a minimal breeze, but it also allowed him easy access to the weapons on his belt. There were five darts, each in their own leather slip, a water flask, and an ornate dagger emblazoned with an extravagant gold worked ?J?. Though he was proficient with each weapon in his possession, he rarely used them, preferring to stick with his hardened wooden staff.

 Tipped on both ends with solid steel caps, the staff had served him well for many years. He had a long history with staffs. He had lived most of his life in his small town of Ganemede and soldier patrols had frequently passed through on their rounds of the countryside. Sometimes they stayed the night, a very popular event back then. When they did, the soldiers would often gather in the town square when it was getting late and, much to the delight of everyone in town, tell stories of their adventures. Whenever these events took place there was rarely a person within five miles who didn?t show up. Sometimes, the soldiers would even pull out their weapons and, carefully, let the children see them. After that, they usually waved their weapons around in a little demonstration of how they were used and, on very rare occasions, would perform mock battles for the awestruck audience. This is what Jedi always looked forward to. Ever since he was young, he had always been fascinated by the grace, speed, and skill with which some of the soldiers could wield their wooden staffs. He would sit in thunderstruck silence as the men effortlessly twirled their weapons through intricate patterns. Usually they were moving so fast that all Jedi could see was a blur. He imagined that the damage they dealt must be devastating, especially at that speed. Unfortunately, staffs were not a very popular weapon among the soldiers at the time and so he was also taught a grudging respect for bladed and ranged weapons, most specifically the daggers, long swords, and longbows.

 Along with his darts and dagger, Jedi also carried his long sword. It was a modest weapon; there was nothing overly fancy about it. At first, he had been somewhat unimpressed with it, but after years of use he had come to respect it for its subtle power. The blade, though unremarkable, was strong and true, always kept razor-sharp. He rarely let anyone see it. His opponent wielded it at the moment.

    The two men duelled on an open patch of grass atop a short cliff overlooking Ganemede. The area was part of a winding trail that followed the cliff edge and was walled off ten feet in by fledgling foliage. The sun was high and warm, shedding golden light over the small battle arena. The grass had been trampled down in a rough circle where countless steps had written out the flow of the fight.

 It had been going on for hours, an endless dance of energy backed by buckets of salty sweat. It was a drill, a practice session, but both sides knew that if they did not give their full attention to the task, they could easily end up dead.

 Jedi twirled his staff back around, bringing it to a ready position. He had been trained well; He rarely went on the offensive. Better, he thought, to let your adversary tire himself out with the exertion of the attack. That way he could bide his time, waiting for the end, and calmly deliver the final blow to the weakened foe.

    The man, Jarred by name, took a quick, deep breath and lunged again into a full force flurry of stabs and slashes.

  Jedi danced backed, parrying where he could, dodging when the blade would have cleaved his staff in two. He patiently waited throughout the tirade for the right moment. At last it came.

   Jarred lunged, sword thrust far forward, in a last ditch effort to stick Jedi on the tip of his blade. Jedi sidestepped and leaned far out, sliding his hands down the shaft of the staff. With all his might he brought it down hard on the flat of the blade.

 Jarred cried out in pain and fell to his knees, dropping the sword, its blade still ringing. Jedi, too, stumbled back, the violent vibration of his wooden staff chaffing his hands. He was determined not to let his pain show. Now was his chance. His enemy was disarmed. Quickly regaining his footing, Jedi brought the end of the staff whistling around aiming it squarely at the back of Jarred?s neck. At the last second, the steel tip stopped, hovering mere centimetres behind the base of Jarred?s skull.

 Jarred froze and slowly turned. His eyes widened when he saw how close it had been to taking his head off. He looked back into Jedi?s eyes, a ghost of fear etched on his face.

 ?You?re dead.? Jedi said in a low, commanding voice.

    The moment dragged on for several moments then a broad smile split Jarred?s face and he broke out laughing, ?That was good.?

    ?I killed you. How do you figure that?s good?? but Jedi couldn?t help grinning. He lowered the staff and with a fancy twirl, shoved it into its sheath on his back. ?That was good, though. I almost thought you were going to skewer me with that crazy lunge of yours.?

   Jarred chuckled. He picked up the fallen long sword and got to his feet. He went to retrieve its scabbard at the edge of the clearing, giving Jedi?s shoulder a hearty clap, ?Yes, sir. You?ve definitely improved since you came back from your journey.?

  Jedi followed the big man and took the scabbard, sword inserted, when Jarred offered it. He reattached it to his belt while his friend pulled his dress shirt over his head, covering his sweat-drenched undershirt.

    Jedi looked up at the sky, ?It?s kind of early to call it a day. I?d say there?s still four hours left, at least. Want to go again??

    Jarred paused with his arm half poking into of his sleeve. He thought about it for a moment then declined with a shake of his head and pulled his shirt all the way on, ?No, there will be plenty of time tomorrow. Besides, I?m too tired to fight again.?

 Jedi nodded and picked up his pack, swinging it over his shoulder, ?Come on, then. We might as well go home. Besides, Tomas wanted to see me today. I probably shouldn?t have left it this late; He?s going to chew my head off.?

   Jarred smirked his agreement as he shouldered his own pack and followed Jedi down the path along the cliff edge, ?If he doesn?t overburden you with some ridiculous errand, why not come to the pub tonight??

   Jedi frowned over at his friend, ?Don?t be silly, Jarred. You know I don?t drink.?

  Jarred lifted his hands in defence, ?No, no. I didn?t mean you had to actually drink anything. Just come and, you know, chum around with the guys. Come on, you just got back last week after how many years abroad? Ten? All your old pals are dying to hear about it. Please??

    Jedi considered this as he made his way through the light foliage that covered the ground. Finally, he agreed. Not that it really mattered. If memory served, he doubted he?d get off easy. Especially where Tomas was concerned. People always seemed to be piling their problems on him, wanting him to do their work for them. He didn?t mind. It helped him keep his mind off the past, helped him forget. And anything that made him forget was more than welcome.


Comments are welcome, of course. :D Criticism? That\'s good too.

Chapter 2 in progress.
« Last Edit: September 18, 2003, 03:24:44 pm by Jedi »

Grakrim

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« Reply #1 on: September 18, 2003, 03:40:44 pm »
Race change, eh?  Sounds like a complicated and costly procedure...

Anyway, you\'ve got a good writing style there.  Writing good and easy to follow action sequences is difficult, but you did quite well.

Bah, with all these good storys coming out, makes me want to quit work on my crappy one.

Good luck with future chapters.
\" I think you should just follow Grakrim\'s advice ;)\"

\"A universe is enough for more than one opinion.\" - Maxximus

kyosan

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« Reply #2 on: September 18, 2003, 10:59:45 pm »
Now the story is good :P but i donno wht the topic sound like \"star wars\" :)
Adn grak dont give up or i have to scrach u :P
I\'m alone...
No one cares about me....
I\'m only a tool for other people\'s needs...
I\'m nothing....
But a slave to all....

Jedi

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« Reply #3 on: September 19, 2003, 11:03:20 am »
Lol. Thanks, guys. :D Don\'t give up, Grak. Practice makes perfect. ;)

Hey, Kyosan. Who\'s that in your sig? I have some pictures of her, but I don\'t know who she is.

Chapter 2 is coming along nicely.

Jedi

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« Reply #4 on: September 24, 2003, 09:59:40 pm »
Chapter 2

?To us, reality is based solely on our perception of it.?~ Jedi

Jedi pulled his cloak up around his shoulders and dashed out of his tent into the torrential downpour. The pelting rain came down in a roaring flood, turning the world into a watery grey blur. His cloak was immediately soaked through, becoming a lead weight on his back, but he strode on purposefully, ignoring the drenching shower. Soldiers moved past, going about their duty, inky blots moving among the larger, darker blots that were the wagons and tents.

Jedi made his way through the camp. He kept his head up, despite the rain. He didn?t want his men to think he was so weak as to bow to the elements. He ploughed on through the deluge making his way to the command tents not far away. In the rain he almost feared getting lost, the downpour was so thick. A man appeared out of the grey and, recognizing him, fell into stride beside him.

The man had to yell to be heard over the torrent, ?Sir! The Sixth Legion just got back from the Headway! Captain DeGracy said he needed to see you immediately!?

Jedi nodded in the gloom, ?Tell him I?m at the Command Tent!?

The man bobbed his head in affirmation and turned to leave, but Jedi snagged his shoulder plate and turned him back, ?Also, if you see Mampshire or Kitara, tell them to go there as well!?

The man saluted and vanished into the water fog.

Jedi turned and continued on. Before long he found the tent and entered, gratefully taking off his drenched cloak and throwing it over the metal mesh near the fire pit where it could begin to dry. Running a hand back through his hair he shook his head to get as much water off as he could. Finally he slogged over to the large wooden table in the middle of the room. It was covered in maps of all sizes, detailing many areas of Hamanara.

Several minutes later Captain DeGracy lumbered into the small tent, traipsing mud onto the rough temporary flooring. He took off his oiled cloak, hung it on the stand by the fire, and made his way to the table.

Jedi straightened and smiled, ?Glad to see you?re alive, Captain.?

Captain Martin DeGracy grinned in return and clasped Jedi?s outstretched arm, ?It?s good to be alive, General. I almost didn?t make it. We had a hell of a ride through the Chisel. Damn Tallics put up one nasty resistance column.?

Jedi pointed the man to the bench on one side of the map table and took the opposite one himself, ?Tell me about it.?

The Captain nodded his thanks and stepped into the seat. He slid his gloves off and set them on the edge of the table away from the maps. Finally, he pointed to a spot on the large map. The area showed a shallow plain bisecting a large mountain range that stretched back to both sides of the map, looking like nothing so much as a huge arrow. ?Headway? was printed neatly on the plain.

?The Sixth Legion fought their way through the Headway up to Drun.? He moved his finger up to rest beneath a small dot representing the little town. ?We fortified there and managed to send our detachment into the Westhead Swamp. The Seventh Legion that was supposed to be covering our flank on the east,? DeGracy looked up to make sure Jedi was paying attention, ?never showed up.?

Jedi frowned, ?What do you mean they never showed up? Didn?t you meet them at Cook??

?Yes, sir. We rendezvoused when we were supposed to, but that was the last time we saw of them.?

?Hmmm, that?s definitely a bad sign.?

The Captain nodded, ?Knowing Commander Cohen, I?d say so.?

Jedi flexed his jaw muscles. Commander Cohen was on of his best men. He and Lieutenant Shafer were supposed to have led the Seventh Legion Up the east side of the Planara River to provide cover for DeGracy. The whole thing was staged to look like just another frontal attack, but this time both the Sixth and Seventh Legion had been tasked with the responsibility of covertly sneaking a special attack division into the swamps on their respective sides. They were then to feign defeat and withdraw. Somewhere along the line, though, something had gone terribly wrong. It was not like Cohen to be late, let alone when lives are at stake. This was frightening news indeed.

Jedi pushed those concerns to the side, ?So, you had no cover from the east and you were attacked. Am I right??

The Captain sighed, ?Yes, that?s about the size of it.?

Jedi ran a hand back through his hair. This was bad, ?How many men did we lose??

DeGracy had to have known the question was coming, but he still looked decidedly uncomfortable. Finally, he rested an arm on the table, ?About thirty thousand.?

Jedi was stunned. The staggering number of dead was almost unheard of. The entire Legion was only fifty thousand strong. That was a crippling blow.

Anger started to seep into Jedi?s voice, ?How did that happen, Captain? By our last reports the Tallic siege fort only had seventy thousand men.?

DeGracy grimaced at the inflection on his title, but he seemed to have expected this reaction, ?Those reports were wrong.?

?Oh, really? And how many Tallics did you really encounter??

The Captain looked away, ?By my count, approximately three hundred thousand.?

Jedi sat back shocked, ?But, the last report was less than a week ago??

?I know, sir.?

?Then where the hell did they come from? Last time I checked, two hundred and thirty thousand units appearing out of nowhere was considered an impossibility! The things are 5 meters tall, for grace sake! How the hell did we miss them??

The Captain wouldn?t meet Jedi?s eyes, ?I don?t know, sir.?

Jedi stood and let out an exasperated sigh. He walked to the hearth and ran a hand through his hair again. Today was definitely not his day. Outside the incessant rain drummed it?s depressing concurrence. It wasn?t the Captain?s fault, Jedi had to remember that. It would serve no purpose to blame him for it. Jedi turned back to the table.

?Sorry, Martin. It?s just that this war has been going on for such a long time and for something like this to happen right when we were approaching the end?? Jedi shook his head sadly, ?It?s disheartening.?

The Captain nodded, ?I understand, sir. I feel the same way.?

Jedi strode back to the table, ?I just need to know where they?re coming from. If I can figure that out, I can probably work up something to stop it.?

At that moment The tent flap lifted aside and young
Wizard Mampshire sauntered in, closely followed by the ever-attractive Kitara.

The flamboyant wizard made a deep bow and flourished his cloak like a diplomat at a county ball, ?May I introduce, Master Mampshire and the lovely Lady Kitara.? His  accent was audibly exaggerated and certainly entertaining.

Despite the circumstances, Jedi couldn?t help grinning, ?Oh, get off it, Mamp.? Jedi shouldered past the flustered wizard and put his arm around Kitara, ?And what about you, my love??

Kitara smirked, ?My, getting a little frisky, are we??

Jedi?s cheeks went red and he began stammering, ?I didn?t mean?uh, I only meant?uh, well, it-?

Kitara cut him off with a firm kiss, wrapping her arms around his neck. When she finally allowed him to part he was smirking too.

?Now, who?s getting frisky?? He asked.

She chuckled and licked his nose, ?Wait ?till tonight and we?ll see.?

Jedi turned to see both other men watching intently, ?What??

Mampshire?s expression turned to mock impatience, ?Are you quite done yet?? The wizard doffed his cloak, which seemed for all the world to be completely dry despite the fact that it was not even oiled, and hung it beside captain DeGracy?s. He then seated himself in Jedi?s spot on the bench.

Jedi shook his head and returned to the table. He pushed Mampshire out of the way, ?Sure, Mamp. You know you liked it. Now move aside.?

Mampshire harrumphed indignantly, but didn?t argue. He instead moved around to the other side of the table and put his foot up on the bench beside Captain DeGracy, leaning his arm on it and focusing his attention on the map, ?So, what ?ave we ?ere??

Jedi slid over as Kitara sat down beside him, ?Big trouble, that?s what.? He leaned forward, resting his elbows on the table, ?Apparently, the Tallics have managed to dig up a ? how shall I say it? ? ?small? reinforcement division numbering, oh, I don?t know, almost a quarter million, maybe more.?

Kitara gasped and Mampshire?s booted foot thumped to the floor, ?A bloody quarter million? You?re out of your bloody mind! Where in bloody grace name did they get that many soldiers? Just picked up their jolly spades and pulled them out of the bloody ground, I suppose.?

Jedi grimaced, ?I don?t know where they came from, but we need to find out.?

?I?d bloody well say so, aye.?

Jedi shot the wizard a look that told him to shut up. Mampshire took a deep breath and muttered something about ?bloody inbred Tallics?, but said nothing more.

Jedi nodded, ?Good. We have two problems. The first, as I was saying, we need to know where these buggers are coming from and how. We have to somehow put a stop to it. Now, we know the scouts returned five das ago and reported only seventy thousand. Yesterday Captain DeGracy was engaged by a horde from the east numbering approximately three hundred thousand.?

Kitara frowned, ?From the East? Cohen?s supposed to have been covering that.?

Jedi nodded grimly, ?I know. That?s the other problem. We need to know what happened to the Seventh Legion. It?s possible that they may have been wiped out by the horde before they turned on the Captain here, but let us pray that such is not the case. Although, it is undoubted that they were engaged by the Tallic force, there is a good chance that some of the men may have escaped into the Braxton Wood or perhaps even The Easthead Swamp. We?ll need a search party sent out there to investigate; remember, Tallics don?t like trees so they most likely would have left any fleeing units alone.?

Captain DeGracy spoke up, ?I?ll volunteer to lead the search and rescue, if that?s open.?

Jedi gave a quick nod of approval. ?I was hoping you would.?

Mampshire spoke out as well, ?I?ll go with him. It?ll be easier to find the men if I?m there. I can sense them. Not to mention acting as a healer. Some are sure to be injured.?

Jedi shook his head, ?Sorry, Mamp. I need you for the scout unit. We need to know exactly where they are getting their reinforcements from. I want you to go and help. If they are using magic of some kind, you?d be the only one who?d know about it. If we don?t find out, then all the healing in the world won?t do those men any good.?

?Oh?well, cheerio then.?

Kitara interjected, ?And where am I going??

Jedi looked over, ?That?s what we have to decide. Both of us are going on a separate mission. It just depends which one you want to go with.?

Kitara looked decidedly disappointed at the prospect of being separated, but didn?t say anything. She instead looked from the Captain to Mampshire and back. The young wizard winked. She smiled and said, ?I think I?ll go with the good wizard for this one.?

?Fine. It?s settled. Captain, I?ll leave gathering a reasonably sized force to you. Mampshire, same. We?ll meet here one more time tomorrow morning and then join our divisions and go.?

Mampshire and the Captain saluted and began to leave.

Jedi called out to them, ?One more thing, If either of you see Commander Dalton tell him to meet us here tomorrow.?

The men acknowledged and, grabbing their garments, dove out into the heavy downpour.

Jedi got up and folded the maps, returning them to their proper bin.

Kitara turned to face him, ?Why do we have to go in separate units??

Jedi

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« Reply #5 on: September 24, 2003, 10:01:01 pm »
Jedi went to check on his cloak on the grill and found it dry. He straightened and swung it over his shoulders, ?Because both DeGracy and Mampshire are needed on their separate missions and neither are the greatest at hand-to-hand combat. That?s why we need to go. I?m especially worried about Mamp. He may be a wizard, but he?s careless at best. You?re a better fighter than I so I?m glad you?re with him. Plus, there?s something I want to look into in the Braxton Wood anyway. So it all works out.? Jedi smiled.

Kitara smiled too. She got up and went over to check her own cloak. It, too, was dry. She put it on and stepped close to Jedi. She reached up and twined one of his cloak strings around her finger, ?Well, we have one more night together. I think we should celebrate. Do you think it?s night yet??

?Oh, grace. I hope so.? Jedi gave her a small smile

Kitara?s lilting laughed filled the tent, making Jedi smile wider still. She stuck her tongue between her teeth, ?Then again, does it really matter??

?I suppose not.? Jedi leaned down and drowned himself in her luscious lips.



AFter I wrote it, I realized that you guys wouldn\'t know what\'s going on so here\'s a very rough sketch of the map they were looking at. I might make an official world map later, but this is the part they\'re focusing on.

Mogley the Bear

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« Reply #6 on: September 25, 2003, 12:42:06 pm »
Hello Jedi...

I loved ur story so informative.

WRITE MORE

Nice cardboard box too:p

kyosan

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« Reply #7 on: September 25, 2003, 09:03:32 pm »
well its going good :P all is kinda nice :) but that map... cant get a thing from it :P
And heck why u allways put ppl in that i know? :P
Jedi.. to my sig... its... Himistu (secret in jap ;) )
I\'m alone...
No one cares about me....
I\'m only a tool for other people\'s needs...
I\'m nothing....
But a slave to all....

Jedi

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« Reply #8 on: September 26, 2003, 11:49:32 am »
:D Hai, wakarimasu. ;)

Davis

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« Reply #9 on: October 06, 2003, 12:01:11 am »
Seems like it would make a great movie, too much focus on detail and dialogue for a book. Definately movieish. You should finish that, get an editor, and make a lot of money off of it. That\'s my suggestion.

shadowmancer

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« Reply #10 on: October 06, 2003, 09:20:43 pm »
Nice intro.
« Last Edit: October 06, 2003, 09:20:59 pm by shadowmancer »
Quote
Originally posted by Evanchild
hes a really talented squirrel.

Moogie

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« Reply #11 on: October 07, 2003, 04:30:08 am »
Wow... it\'s rare, but I actually find myself wanting to read more of this story. Hope to see more chapters soon James, you have a beautiful writing talent and an excellent story unfolding here. :)

shadowmancer

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« Reply #12 on: October 08, 2003, 06:47:54 pm »
So... Is it gonna be a movie?
Quote
Originally posted by Evanchild
hes a really talented squirrel.

Monketh

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« Reply #13 on: October 11, 2003, 10:57:45 am »
Lol Shadowmancer.
This is excellent!  Very few things can get lazy Monk to visit this section, and this is one of them. :)
The key to manipulative bargaining is to ask for something twice as big as what you want, then smile and nod when you are talked down to your original wish. You are still young, my apprentice, and have much to learn in the ways of the force. -UtM

Jedi

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« Reply #14 on: November 04, 2003, 08:18:14 am »
Wow...you actually like it? 80 And here I thought I was just a hoe-down loser. Maybe I still am. 8(

I stopped writing because I thought nobody cared. I\'ll continue it then. :D

Lol, a movie. Good idea, but...well...I\'m just too darn Canadian to get the interest of american producers. :rolleyes: