thanks for all the positive feedback, all of you.
Yes, I trust this community pretty well. I\'ve known most of you for quite a while now, and while often opinions are different on these boards, I can say that most of you are nice people on the inside and intelectually worth more in your weight in salt as the saying goes. moral values are strong on these boards.
I\'ve tried chemical means before, Trazodone gives me hallucinations, actually waking dreams, I would dream at night and wake up still dreaming. Zoloft makes me anxious and jittery, the medicine that they gave me for the anxiety weakened my immune system and gave me infections... most of the other things they\'ve tried do nothing at all or have had some kind of bad side effect...
The problem isn\'t that I havent told the councellors about my depression, I just haven\'t told them about suicidal thoughts. they\'ve tried probably a dozen different types of drugs.
Depth, I\'ve never actually tried to commit suicide, just had the urges. but I\'ve studied enough to know a few things about it.
the majority of people who make multiple attempts on their own lives are faking it. they don\'t actually want to kill themselves, but they lavish in the attentions they get from adults who know about the behavior. this doesn\'t make the actions any less destructive. When one makes a public attempt on one\'s own life, it affects everyone who knows them. people around them are torn with emotions. it also affects their future. no one can really trust someone who has tried to kill themselves, if a person doesn\'t feel their own life matters, they might decide to end someone elses as a means of making more of an impact on the world around them.
many people disclaim this saying that it\'s just speculation, yet, if everyone who attempted suicide really meant it, the population of the world would be MUCH lower than it is.
however, every now and then someone comes along who does want to end their lives, yet is either inept or is actually as afraid of death so much that their attempts to kill themselves fail.
either way, yes, your sister needs help. in the first case, she\'s traumatising the people who care about her. in the second, she has already proven that she\'ll make the attempt, and it\'s only a matter of time before she manages to kill herself.
as for myself
I feel that as long as I have family and friends I won\'t be in danger of commiting suicide, I care too much about those around me to make them hurt the way that they would if I were to die.
