Dev (a la XilliX):
My castle stands upon the hill.
it shines of whitest bone.
when noobies came here noobies died.
from them I make my home.
Their skulls adorn my throne.
Noob:
dude omfg
wtf?
you just pwnt my ass.
I'm calling a ref.
and where are the mounts?
and why can't I fly?
and which way is south?
and what if I die?
Dev:
once came nooby from nooby town,
the noobiest noob around.
he came and went in ignorance
until his bones I ground.
his cries were not profound.
Noob:
give me a longsword.
please give me some cash.
I don't read a word,
please do a podcast.
and where are the mounts?
and why can't I fly?
and which way is south?
and what if I die?
Dev:
the waypost here has warning:
"Dear noobies, Stay Away!"
and yet they tread on my dark path
a nooby game they play
I make them rue the day!
Noob:
Hey wanna cyber?
where do I sell hides?
hey, where do I mine?
I hate reading guides.
and where are the mounts?
and why can't I fly?
and which way is south?
and what if I die?
Dev:
Then hundreds upon thousands came
far too many to kill,
I dug a pit to catch the lame.
My sign read "Blood will spill."
Alas the noobs came still .
Noob:
Make me your buddy
hey, check out my site.
what is your email
now where do i fight?
and where are the mounts?
and why can't I fly?
and which way is south?
and what if I die?
Dev:
As time wore on I wanted peace
millions and millions dead.
the flow of noobs would never cease
many a forum thread
where useless noobies said:
Noob:
Hey wanna cyber?
where do I sell hides?
hey, where do I mine?
I hate reading guides.
and where are the mounts?
and why can't I fly?
and which way is south?
and what if I die?
Dev:
My noobskin coat it serves me well.
as I make noobies cold.
They are no aid to man or gods
I waste no time to scold
complaints make game devs old.
[Bridge then Primary speaker becomes secondary]
Dev:
I hate noobs too much
I pull out my hair.
This chorus won't end.
I start to despair.
No there are no mounts,
Jump this cliff to fly
and that way is south
and I'll help you die
Noob:
A pop-up came! I hit the X.
I have no one to blame.
now i'm lost. What do I do next?
this game is so hard
but i won't read a guide
I fell off a mountain
slipped and I died.
Dev:
When I lost patience for the noobs
I divined what to do.
3 letters newbies never know
placed on the hill below
my sign read FAQ
Dev:
My castle stands upon the hill.
it shines of whitest bone.
when noobies came here noobies died.
from them I make my home.
Their skulls adorn my throne.
http://www.xordan.com/Nooby%20Song.mp3