Shadow in the Hills critique

[Baston]

[
@Monk : you just confirm what I was thinking. The game itself is only directed for "good" players, so it's obvious that you can except only victory from them in your RP. Is it a reason for having only parody RPs ? Their is not altar or monument for the Dark Flame religion, but many players choosed it when they create their characters. Just let me remember to everyone that the only point where the Darkness have an official spot is the Dark Crystal room in the Death Realm... And what is the story of this Crystal ? It was only a mere garnishment before Setill came with the Dark Cystal story.
What I proposed to Xillix and others was just to use this RP to makes another place for "Evils" and i'm not willing to destroy Hydlaa because of course it's not possible. I explained you what I was thinking in game.

@Darkshade : the fact you loose your story is not surprising for me. This is what happen when you try to have a directed RP and not telling all the players involved in what will happen. You have wrote a great story but how is this going in game ?

@Both of you : If you have told everyone what was the story you were RPing maybe all Darkness will not have been Vodùl's fact. I have read all the post of this thread and related but personnaly (so maybe others players feels the same) I just don't get your "Shadows" story. Monk told me what he was thinking after I told him that I will quit this RP... A bit late no ? When I say that everyone must have the same informations, it's not to make the RP even in terms of story, it's just to allow everyone to be consistent.
Like I said many times, I don't want to mess the fun or something so I will finish this but, I know that some others players have no longer fun in this RP because of the decisions you made. I like very much roleplaying, not blindly follow orders from other players.

And hum... I agree with Zanaibar about him not reading all things on the forum. And you must not forget one things : it's not possible to every single players of PS to read the whole RP threads. Just because it's very huge ! I read the threads on my playtime and not everyone have 2 or 3 hours to spend reading the stories (I think they miss great stories but this is not the point). So you may have to quickly sum the RP to players or even ask them ooc if they are up to date with the stories. I believe that players who wants to be involved in RP event will read the story on the forum anyway but it's not possible for everyone and we must keep things enjoyable for everyone. Even if it's a pain in the butt to tell other players a story wich is already posted on the forum.

Good day.
]

[Peacer]

And hum... I agree with Zanaibar about him not reading all things on the forum. And you must not forget one things : it's not possible to every single players of PS to read the whole RP threads. Just because it's very huge ! I read the threads on my playtime and not everyone have 2 or 3 hours to spend reading the stories (I think they miss great stories but this is not the point). So you may have to quickly sum the RP to players or even ask them ooc if they are up to date with the stories. I believe that players who wants to be involved in RP event will read the story on the forum anyway but it's not possible for everyone and we must keep things enjoyable for everyone. Even if it's a pain in the butt to tell other players a story wich is already posted on the forum.

[agreed, a summary on about ten lines would be a good idea, although monk suggested this.]

[Monk_]

The game itself is only directed for "good" players, so it's obvious that you can except only victory from them in your RP. Is it a reason for having only parody RPs?

No, this just happens to be one.

What I proposed to Xillix and others was just to use this RP to makes another place for "Evils" and i'm not willing to destroy Hydlaa because of course it's not possible. I explained you what I was thinking in game.

Yes we have established this.

This is what happen when you try to have a directed RP and not telling all the players involved in what will happen. You have wrote a great story but how is this going in game?

Let's just get one thing straight. This is going awesomly in-game, with loads of people have a great time.

The superthread is not directed but co-ordinated. Any issues have been due to under-information, not over-controlling. This superthread cannot be held responsible for any player's management of a related ingame mini-event. It is appropriate to dispute plot developments in the superthread, but please have discussions about RP style or player conduct through other channels (such as this new thread).

Monk told me what he was thinking after I told him that I will quit this RP... A bit late no ? When I say that everyone must have the same informations, it's not to make the RP even in terms of story, it's just to allow everyone to be consistent.

That's what that thread is for. I thought you had read that thread when you first joined the RP, but you had not.

it's not possible to every single players of PS to read the whole RP threads. Just because it's very huge ! I read the threads on my playtime and not everyone have 2 or 3 hours to spend reading the stories (I think they miss great stories but this is not the point). So you may have to quickly sum the RP to players

That thread is for reporting and summarising this theme's RP events and co-ordinating them. Please only use the thread for that from now on and it will be a lot shorter for everyone to read.

[zorbels]

[ooc] - Again I will say this, most of what is posted here has already gone on in game. I think it is good that way, then if people decide to join the roleplay they can read what has already occured and find away to fit themselves in. It is also logged history for ps players to take a look at years down the road and see what went on in the land of Yliakum. There are summaries for those to lazy to read the posted logs and quite frankly it took alot of work to put together what I have posted here for others to read. It bothers me that there are compliants about this thread and "Having to read it on the forums". If you have an issue with it then why do you keep coming back to read it? Really is it that big of a deal? 

[Baston]

[ this is my last post ooc in this thread.
And this is just to say that I think you misunderstood me : I have read the whole thread more than once, and also the related ones... Monk, you get the idea I haven't read those because of what I was thinking of those Darkness. I explain you igame what was my thoughs about that.
And Zorbels how could I have compliment you on your writting style without reading you ?

However, i agree with Monk about letting this place free of ooc post.
My apologies to have bothered you all with all this OOC chat.
]

[zorbels]

And Zorbels how could I have compliment you on your writting style without reading you ?

  I think we have a misunderstanding Baston. My last post was not directed at you spacifically. What I have quoted (your statement) implies that you feel it was. I am ecstatic that you like my writing style and I hope you feel the same way about my complimenting you on your english. That unfortantly does not have anything to do with the topic I was discussing. Complaining about "Having to read it on the forums" or "This should be done in game" was what I was focused on in my last post. I was trying to make a point, and the point was that these ooc and ic postings are good for the community to read and learn from.  They do no damage as far a I can tell, and they help the ps community to communicate with each other. It shouldn't matter so much ...... though there are a few who try and make it an issue. I was expressing my thoughts on the matter and showing my distaste for negitive out looks on the topic.  

[narita]

Sorry Zorbels, but the super thread is super long and super hard to read, specialy for people like me who are not fluent in english. It's mostly a lot of huge blocks of text without context except an article few page before.

For reading ease, please writters, do the following things:

 - Write an introduction. Describe where and when it's happen, who act. You can even do a short description of the character involved. That's what people expect to read at start.
 
 - Do paragraphs, for pity's sake. Let the text and reader breathe. Do it regulary,  even when the text don't have a logical break. I think ten lines of text is enough of a paragraph, sometime more like in conversation where lines are short, but never for any reason send a hundred lines long paragraph. If you publish logs, you can use acting (someone come in or leave, someone do something with /me) as separation.

- Write a conclusion, to describe how people involved in the scene are after that. It would help people who haven't have the time to read all to understand, and if the conclusion is still open, it will give to everyone the desire to read the next part.

If you want a example on how to do, please take a look on last Monk's article
http://hydlaa.com/smf/index.php?topic=23345.msg255936#msg255936

About your articles and the forum, Zorbels, You probably noticed the defaut style of the forum is terrible. Maybe that's why you're using other colors and font weight. But the only way I found to fix the forum uglyness is to use the Karyu's theme who has a brown background. Unfortunately, the colors you choose don't fit with, specialy when you write red or blue :-/

[zanzibar]

I think another problem is the fact that some characters decide to ignore anyone who isn't in their immediate circle of friends 'during an RP'.  The whole idea of a specific period of time being 'an RP' is bogus because you're supposed to be in RP mode whenever you're in game, but the way some people make it so exclusive is bogus too.  You're in a community, and others are around you.  You have to react to them in character when they're reacting to you in character, otherwise the suspension of disbelief is challenged.

[ou8i8uo]

Wow, Underthemoon, I got a buzz from reading your story there, then I got to Zanzibar's post and it went away.

[Anfa]

frustrating having comments in what should be the storywriting section..

Anfa looks up at her own words and goes DoH!!!

Anfa goes back to the storywriting...

Cheers!!

Edit:  yeah Karyuu

[zorbels]

  Sorry narita, I have no idea what people see on their PC's. I use the bold font to make my writings bigger and the  purple color that the forums provide for color. I try and keep my postings short, but sometimes it is hard to do when there are parties invovled and I want to make sure I mention everyone and not leave out details that maybe important. I can't please everyone, and I do not have control over how the forums display themselves. I don't feel my posts are super long compared to others I have seen. I am not sure what I can do for my post that would make it easier for the people who are not fluent in english. The suggestions you listed above I feel I have already done, I am not sure as to what else can be done?

[ou8i8uo]

Maybe a child board would apply here no?

[Karyuu]

Child board? For what? :}

Please keep your comments about the story or thread in this Critique, and leave the other for the roleplay/summaries. It keeps things organized.

[zorbels]

I think another problem is the fact that some characters decide to ignore anyone who isn't in their immediate circle of friends 'during an RP'.  The whole idea of a specific period of time being 'an RP' is bogus because you're supposed to be in RP mode whenever you're in game, but the way some people make it so exclusive is bogus too.  You're in a community, and others are around you.  You have to react to them in character when they're reacting to you in character, otherwise the suspension of disbelief is challenged.

[OOC] I shouldn't be humoring this and probably let it be but.....

Zanzibar the people invovled in the roleplay are from different "circles" and have come together to join their stories. They are all very friendly and have made it a point to say, "Hey come join in!" If you are waiting for someone to hand you a part well that just isn't going to happen. I involved myself in this story and did the work myself. If you want in, then start thinking of ways to develop a story to bring yourself in. Forgive me if I am a little annoyed with you, but you interupted a roleplay of mine that involved this story and you didn't seem to give a rats behind at the time about roleplay as you were to busy trying to bully someone in to a duel with you. Also as a long standing member of the community you should know such questions as "Whats going on?" and "why?" or "That isn't possible." (Questioning everything instead of going with the flow) in the middle of a roleplay can be quite distracting. If I walk in on a story being roleplayed out, I stand back and listen first before asking questions. You also purposely ignored some facts about a roleplay I was having and pretended that the roof of the tavern was still there, yet everyone around you was playing like it was not  ... as it was a huge hole blown though the roof from the demon being exercised from Zorbels. Basically you make it hard to roleplay with you, and it is trying at times. You say everyone is apart of the community then act like it and quit picking everything apart all the time. We are here to have fun. Period.

By the way this is  and needs to go into the thread karyuu so kindly moved so that this super story thread wasn't full of OOC comments. Sorry for posting here karyuu and you may delete or move my post if it is inappropriate. I just had to get my two cents in this one time. 

[narita]

Please Zorbels, don't change your writting style for me. It's nice.

I was only speaking about staging the writting. Keep the content and the writting style yours. I never wanted someone to use other words than his.

For exemple, when you, or someone else, publish a log, the reader who was not present at the event don't have any idea at start who is here, where it has happened and why people meet. Just tell it. It can be short or a part of the writting as you want.

Also, paragraphs help to read. Just skip lines here and there.

A ending part as conclusion, if none is already is the log, confirms the reader he has well understand what have changed and give him the desire to know what will happen after.

Of course, this is not absolute rules, different authors may have different points of view and some may even derogate to give a special effect.

About the colours, I know everyone tries to make his best to make this forum pretty, but sometime, the result is not as expected. Here is a snapshot to show how I see your post, using Karyuu's theme:


*edit*

Maybe a child board would apply here no?

A board for children would be perfect for me 

Please avoid posting two or more successive posts before others have replied. Just edit your last post to add new information. Thanks! --Karyuu